I'm about to give up on God

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Walterross

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Hi everyone. I’m asking/writing this because I’ve just about lost all my faith in God. I suffer from serious depression and anxiety (social anxiety to be specific). It has gotten very hard. I’m a college student and I don’t know what I want to do with my life. I’ve tried and failed to like two majors already and can’t see anything that I would be good at/like. I don’t have a ton of money so I can’t live on campus and make friends. I also tend to separate myself from most social situations like parties or get togethers because of the sinful nature of it: (ie. having sex, drinking underage, cursing) Obviously these things are attractive because it seems like everyone who does these things are happy and are having great social lives. Me, on the other hand, who is separating myself from these because of GOD, am stuck with depression and anxiety. I’ve tried so long to avoid sin and don’t get any sort of recognition or pat on the back like a good parent from God. I’m actually given suicidal thoughts that I have no future so why go on? I’m very frustrated with God because he allows me to suffer so much but continuously tells me not to do what everyone else is doing. If I did, who knows? Maybe I’d be happy if I partied or drank underage and had premarital sex. God isn’t in my life when I’m not so what difference does it make? It makes me question what kind of God he is or if he even exists at all.
 
I’ve been here and it started when I was just 13

I know it seems unfair now and I still lose it at times with these seemly stupid and harsh demands of a faithful life
But God did not promise us happiness all throughout this earthly life

I can guarantee you the temptation to do what they do will get boring and not last
Sure right now it seems that you’re missing out and intentionally depriving yourself of good things
But they aren’t good things

And God will never forget this pain
And his not happy you feel this way but he will allow it if it brings you back to him so He can repay you this pain with happiness times infinity that you can’t fathom

So sure I feel you
It seems like life was perfectly designed to specifically screw you over
And I’m only 17 now and I was and still am at times
Afraid to continue living because I don’t see much in it

But I do want heaven no matter what it is
Because it’s not hell and I do want to be happy

God blessed me with a couple hobbies and tiny miracles in my friendships recently
Maybe he’ll act for you when you expect it least

Don’t give up yet man or ever
 
Don’t ever give up on God, no matter what things look like right now. I watched this YouTube video about a Jewish professor who became Catholic because of his experience with the Blessed Mother and Jesus. I think it might help you understand that Jesus is always always with us. Good luck honey. I’ve sort of been where you are many many years ago. The Blessed Mother brought me back to Jesus a long time ago and though it seems like I took baby steps forever, everyday I submit my will to Him. I am an old lady now. I cannot wait to see Him. God bless you Walterross.

 
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First off, I’m so sorry you’re feeling the way you are. Depression and anxiety are both hell. If you’re having suicidal thoughts, I would recommend professional counseling. It helps. It can also help to view these afflictions as crosses for you to bear. Often the most holy people in scripture were the ones who suffered the most. Offer up your sorrows to the Lord, even when you don’t want to think about Him, and He will grant you abundant graces. You might not feel like He is, but He is. Everything will fall in place for you, if you persevere.

Second, think about why these people might seem happy. They get drunk, and they do drugs. They use their bodies in all sorts of impure ways, and they blaspheme without a care in the world. They’re running after the carrot Satan wants them to chase, and most of them are probably going to fall for his trap. Don’t fall for it. Such a lifestyle isn’t good for studies, and you run the risk of losing God forever. He IS in your life, even when the trials are at their most severe.

The path to salvation is long and arduous, the gate is narrow, and the rewards are greater than you can possibly imagine. Remember, God loves you. I’ll be praying for you.
 
Definitely don’t give up on God, He will never give up on you! I know it can feel alienating to not go with the culture. I was, unfortunately in the middle in college. I was always a believer but did loosen a bit on my morals. I regret that. I think that most of those who do that will regret it also. When I got into my thirties I saw so many people who were depressed because they did give up. The atheist mentality was so empty for them, they were striving for more. Do try and get out and have some healthy fun, maybe find a Newman center and try to make some friends there? Join a recreational sports team? There may be quite a few like minded people around you! Don’t forget to keep praying!
“The fruit of silence is prayer;
The fruit of prayer is faith;
The fruit of faith is love;
The fruit of love is service;
The fruit of service is peace.”
Mother Theresa
 
Good advice upthread.
I’ll remember you in my prayers 🙂:pray:t2:
 
You’ve received some wonderful advice already, so I’ll just jump into a more practical question. Is there a Catholic student center, (e.g. Newman), on your campus? The trick to navigating college life is surrounding yourself with the right people. I understand that your social anxiety is an impediment, but just attending Mass around other Catholic students, having a sane place to hang out and study, etc. can be really comforting. I have fond memories of my own home-away-from-home Catholic student center!

Another thought is that while you’re going through your vocational crisis is to consider a leave of absence. Doing so is a lot better than winding up with too much debt and/or a career you regret. You could go work, intern, or volunteer somewhere while you get your head back on!

The great part of being a student is that the on-campus counseling should be free or cheap. Make good use of it if you’re not already. Or, barring that, ask a priest for a recommendation.

Praying for you!
 
Ps as someone who also struggled with social anxiety a lot in college I would recommend as the above person said you could always try counseling. I heard a great thing once,
If your regretful your in the past,
If your anxious your in the future,
If your at peace your in the moment.

While I can’t agree completely, sometimes guilt or regret can highlight a lesson, anxiety can show us something sometimes…etc. Generally I think it’s reasonable.
 
Hi Wateross, are you able to share with us how you got to this place?
 
Surprised no one has suggested this, but OP: what about counseling for your depression and anxiety? When you’re depressed, it clouds your perception of everything, including God.

Does your college have mental health resources you can take advantage of?
 
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I am a little taken aback by how you are blaming everything negative in your life on God, OP.
Do you also credit him with the good things in your life?
 
God will never give up on you. This may be his test to see how faithful you truly are (spiritual dryness, perhaps). Oh, and you are very smart to avoid those sinful parties! Good call, stick with it 👍
 
Hang in there.
Begin to pray, for others, not for yourself.
Ask God to give you ideas and desires to help others, quietly, mainly those people that God has placed near to you (family, friends, co-workers, fellow students).
The goal is replace self-focus with a focus on pleasing God, serving Him and others.
It’s in this effort to go against the grain of self, to quietly, hiddenly almost serve others, that will lead to a quiet joy.

We don’t serve others FOR joy…we serve others because it’s an imitation of Jesus Christ, it’s drawing closer to Him in our love for others. The closer we get to Him, the more sure our joy will become. It’s always hard to go against the grain of selfishness, takes pratice, takes the Sacraments (Eucharist, regular Sacramental Confession) and it takes lots of smiling and beginning again with God.

I will offer up some tedious work for you today, know that we’re praying for you.
 
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Hello.

I’m so sorry you’re feeling like this. I think the college years are very difficult and that you should round up all the support you can get. I’ve suffered from anxiety & depression all my life, but getting help has made a large difference. God puts people, trials, and things before us that sometime appear as obstacles in our plans, but are sometimes something else → it could be God is trying to get your attention for something, I don’t know.
We don’t always know the reason for something except in hindsight.

Please, please find a therapist and go to the sessions.

Also, go to confession and tell the priest how you’re feeling - make sure the priest is good and holy, and who you admire & trust. Make it a habit to go to confession with this priest. Get yourself to Mass at least every Sunday and receive communion. Have you tried going to Adoration? It can help to go and tell God you feel like giving up and ask for His help. It may help too to pray to the Blessed Virgin Mary for help. God will answer your prayers, perhaps not in the way you’ve asked Him to, but He will answer. Do you say the rosary? Could you pray for me to start saying the rosary? I don’t say it often like I used to.

Also, read the lives of the Saints.

From what I’ve read of your post, you are doing admirably, trying to live a moral life in a difficult culture that doesn’t always respect morality. You are in my prayers.

Of course, this is just my opinion and please take or leave what isn’t useful.

Please don’t give up fighting the good fight. We already know that we win.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
1-800-273-8255
 
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