I'm addicted

  • Thread starter Thread starter thestudentAD
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
thestudentAD said:
I go to confession whenever I can now, about at least once a week or twice in one week. I still struggle with masturbation. I have started praying the divine mercy and the Holy rosary, striving not to procastinate. And yet… half an hour ago after doing the fourth day of Divine Mercy: It happened again.
Click to expand...
Confession is key.

The Catholic Church makes an enormously important point that we can consciously and intentionally PUT ourselves in situations and ALLOW OURSELVES to sin. So avoid putting yourself in proximity. Shyt, why not cancel your internet for six months?!?!

You’re not gay. You’ve just seen nasty stuff and any nasty stuff makes you curious.

Masturbation is unfulfilling; that’s a two-sided secret. On one side, this unfulfillment keeps drawing you back to the illusion of fulfillment that it gives; on the OTHER side, you DO consciously KNOW that this just don’t work. So why make things worse?

Give up the porn and you’ll find dealing with women easier. And heck, DO something, get out of the house, join a club or group, meet people, do things with people.
 
  1. You need to talk with a (as in ONE) priest to find out when and if these kinds of things are mortal sins for you.
  2. It’s time to start praying the rosary and getting to Daily Mass when you can
  3. It’s good that you haven’t had sex when you are not in a valid marriage.
 
thestudentAD said:
I go to confession whenever I can now, about at least once a week or twice in one week. I still struggle with masturbation. I have started praying the divine mercy and the Holy rosary, striving not to procastinate. And yet… half an hour ago after doing the fourth day of Divine Mercy: It happened again.
Click to expand...
I don’t think this is something that will go away right away, especially if you are addicted. Just keep at it.
 
Here is my practical advice.

Tell yourself you are going to immediately go to confession every time you fall. Convince yourself that your soul is in serious jeopardy every time you fall.

When you go a day without it, congratulate yourself on the victory of one day. After a week, don’t think (as many do) that you’ve been so good, you can’t be expected to continue for more than a week (or however long you’ve gone before) or deserve a “break” or the like. Tell yourself that you have come this far, you don’t want to break your streak of purity. Think about how the very hands that you can hold Christ during communion are the same hands you use. Read The Screwtape Letters and picture the demon that is tempting you into sin at every moment. Then take satisfaction in ruining that demon’s day.

Don’t allow yourself to doubt Catholic doctrine on this issue. “What if the Church is wrong?” But you know she is not. The devil will convince you the Church is overly harsh just long enough for you to fall.

Then take a bunch of practical steps. Move your computer to somewhere that it is not private. Get rid of anything you use when you do. Put crucifixes and pictures of Mary everywhere. Make a cross your mouse pointer, so that you will not dare use that cross to click on smut. Get this software x3watch.com/. Using it, it will automatically alert your accountability partner when you visit bad websites (if you don’t know of anyone to be your accountability partner, PM me, I would be happy to do so). Wear a long rosary at all times, so that you notice it if you take off any clothes. Play gospel or choir music at all times at home. Wear purity rings on each hand, and find ones that would make the act uncomfortable. Wear a rosary bracelet on the hand you use. If you do it in the shower, sing Church music in the shower from the moment you enter to the moment you leave, or watch a music video on youtube for some Christian song right before you get in (I like “Three Wooden Crosses”).

Also, become an activist against this smut. Browse these forums daily and pray constantly for those who struggle against it. Post the strategies you find to work. You will find that when you declare this sin to be an enemy, and you publicly work against it, thoughts of it will raise disgust, not temptation.

You have to remember that the battle is largely a practical one, and small steps (in addition to God’s abundant grace) can be enough to tip the balance in your favor.

Finally, know that it is NOT impossible. Many people who are guilty of this daily sin for many, many years break its hold over them. Imagine how good it will feel not to have to confess this particular sin–and with sufficient openness to God’s grace, YOU WILL MAKE IT.
 
My story is almost identical to yours, thestudentAD. I found freedom through the intercession of Our Blessed Mother - I asked the Association of the Miraculous Medal to pray for me, for freedom, and on December 8, 2012, that freedom was granted, the chains were loosed. Of course, it wasn’t just magically fixed - I began going to confession every other week, praying the rosary every day, as well as installing rigorous blockers on my computer, and really diving into Catholic faith. I can’t say I haven’t fallen since then, but there’s a certain freedom. It’s not easy, and it’s something I struggle with every day, but I think that’s the key, is to actually struggle. When many people say they struggle with something, they mean they give up. You need to fight, like the good soldier of Christ that you are. In the military, if you get injured, you get a medal - you only lose when you give up or desert. So, keep fighting, use the weapons at your disposal (sacraments and sacramentals) and soldier on.

Also, many suggestions from others have been fantastic (well, except the ‘stop it’ one, I’ve tried, it doesn’t really work well.) I really like Matt Fradd, Jason Evert is good, and so is Christopher West. I highly recommend listening or watching their talks. My prayers are with you.
 
ON a sidenote Biff, there’s a restaurant that’s owned by a Major from WWII (A MARINE). He has all this military patches, photos, and whatnot on the wall. In fact, he himself is a writer, just as i want to be a writer myself. usually, I do military science fiction, but often I find myself doing scifi adventures with a bit of military (Grew up military, wanted to join, but my anxiety disorder came on during parent’s divorce… did go into Naval JROTC, though, that was nice.)
 
TK421 said:
Install software to block pornographic sites. Change the password for the software to a random combination of numbers and letters, and discard the password. Do this on all devices you use.

Begin saying the Rosary daily. Combine the Rosary while going on a walk if helpful.

Begin exercising 2-4 times per week.

Pray to God for his graces, for charity, strength ,for courage, for perseverance. Accept your dependency on him and acknowledge your inferior station; of your own meager willpower being pitted against a world of eroticism that is being directed by our enemy, who is immensely more powerful than you are.

Confess. If you fail, confess again. If you fail, confess again. For the sake of uncomfortable edification, I recommend face-to-face Confession, though obviously either is fine for receiving absolution. 2nd: Confess all daily venial sins in your life. Do not let the sole topic of your Confession be your acts of impurity. Confess these sins and intentionally work on them with the same pro-active assertiveness as you are giving to cease impurity. Sins are not islands. All sin begets all other sin. All acts of charity beget all other acts of charity. The stronger, the higher, the further you go in all areas, the stronger you will be in all areas. God is not interested in your mastery over your sex organ. What good is a sex organ independent from the body? He is not interested in your mastery over your head. What good is your head severed from your body? He is not interested in your mastery over your stomach. What good is your stomach removed from your body? He wants everything: so focus on everything.

Corporal works of charity and self-improvement. This is more important than any other piece of advice (other than Confession). Research ways to involve yourself in your parish, in your community, in your school, in your family, in your neighborhood. When this habit is broken, it is going to be because of the advancement of charity, not because of the repression of violent urges. Involve yourself. Use your hands, your tongue, your heart, your mind, and serve. Do not deem a service to be beneath you. If you have a schedule where you come home and sit around doing whatever, then you will lose. There is not enough willpower within your small person to overcome this age of eroticism by itself. You can either appeal for aid through works of charity, through positive socialization that strengthens you rather than serves as a near occasion of sin, and through activities of self-improvement, or you can lose. Confession is the sacrament that absolves you from sin if you have fallen, but works of mercy are what keep you up.

Finally: you must never give up giving up. This isn’t an evil that is going to go away without struggle. When you first commit to giving up, it’s going to be like the first 20 minutes of Saving Private Ryan and the last 20 minutes of Rocky II put together, figuratively speaking. It’s not going to be pretty. Through the repetition of your sins, you have made them fortified within you.
Click to expand...
Will I be heard even if I’m in mortal sin?
 
I’ve fallen hard again. My brothers shouldn’t go through what I went through. I don’t want them to see my bad habits. I’ve been trying to be a better brother, instead, I’m a Jimmy Swaggart and Ted Haggard.
Can you all pray for me, please?
 
Though not addicted, I have battled porn use in my past. I was using it a few times a month as a stress reliever when I was working two jobs plus finishing school. Then I began to really enjoy it and used it whenever stress hit.

I believe I can help. How I got away from it was to do a slow weaning. I gave up all porn sites except one, then I gave up all on that site except one video, and then I gave that up too. Once you break the porn cycle it becomes easier to stop masturbating as well. Do a step down process and pray, pray. pray.

Another point most people never mention; you are going to fail a couple of times. There will be so much temptation, and you will give in at some point. That does not make YOU a failure. Just start the process over again with a firm determination to get better.

You will beat this.
 
thestudentAD said:
Hey everyone…
I’ll admit it. I’m addicted to porn. I started seeing video game sex vids when I was twelve, started masturbating at that time when I started reading erotic scenes and watching them. I first saw my first live action porn vid before my eighteenth or seventeenth birthday. I also watched it under the excuse that it would keep me heterosexual when my OCD came along and I had homosexual thoughts.
I’ve told my Dad… I haven’t told my stepmother. My pastor knows it, along with the other priests. My brothers, thank Heaven, don’t know it. And I don’t want them to see what I see.
I’ve wasted my graduate money on sex chats and sex sites, but it’s not fulfilling. I’ve never had sex… only masturbated.😦
Dear gosh, I want to get into a good relationship with a woman with an emotional and passionate aspect… and yes, I’m a Catholic. And I know I shouldn’t be doing this stuff. It’s just… so hard to let go, y’know? Sometimes, I’ve thought about writing my own erotic scenes. 😊
What should I do?
Click to expand...
Hi!

I have been in your shoes for years until one day when I wholeheartedly repented of all my sexual addictions and decided to loyally follow Jesus Christ and his teachings forever.

The only way for you to get to the point where you’ll be able to completely abandon the bad habits of watching porn and masturbating is to develop a live, interactive everyday relationship with Jesus, because you won’t be able to quit porn and masturbation all by yourself.

There were only 2 things that helped me develop my own live, interactive daily relationship with Jesus and that can also help you do the same:
  1. After being stuck in my sexual addictions as well as being absent from the church for over 15 years, I finally returned to God by attending a Mass and got to listen to the following Gospel (Matthew 7:21, 24-27), that’s the Parable of the Wise and Foolish Builders (also known as the House on the Rock):
*Follow Jesus’ teaching, like a wise man who built his house on rock.

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father in heaven. . .

“Everyone then who hears these words of mine and acts on them will be like a wise man who built his house on rock. The rain fell, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not act on them will be like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell — and great was its fall!”*

As I was carefully listening to this parable, I was almost shivering with fear, and my tears, one by one, started slowly dropping down my cheeks.

I could feel my entire soul hurt and slowly heal as I was sincerely repenting of all my sins piled up over the years.

Jesus’ words in this Gospel renewed my fear of God because I could immediately recognize myself as that foolish builder and knew that if I didn’t decide to change and be the wise man, I could easily have God furiously punish me by letting me end up in hell forever.

This was the day when I not only gave up the evil and the foolishness of all my sexual compulsive behaviors around meeting women but also I firmly decided to follow Jesus’ teaching for the rest of my life.

Hence until you’re able to identify yourself with the character of the foolish builder while indulging in porn and masturbation and decide to wholeheartedly repent of all your sins, you won’t be able to completely abandon your current sexual addictions.
  1. Once you take step 1., I suggest that you take some time and efforts to identify your top passion in life and then fully commit to fulfilling it.
The reason I suggest that you do so is because dedicating yourself to fulfilling your top passion will not only distract you from your past bad habits but also most likely motivate you to enter such a strong, live, interactive daily relationship with Jesus where you’ll be constantly praying for both His blessings and His overall leadership throughout your journey to achieving your dream, passion-filled life.

God bless you!

Bruno
 
Jay417 said:
Though not addicted, I have battled porn use in my past. I was using it a few times a month as a stress reliever when I was working two jobs plus finishing school. Then I began to really enjoy it and used it whenever stress hit.

I believe I can help. How I got away from it was to do a slow weaning. I gave up all porn sites except one, then I gave up all on that site except one video, and then I gave that up too. Once you break the porn cycle it becomes easier to stop masturbating as well. Do a step down process and pray, pray. pray.

Another point most people never mention; you are going to fail a couple of times. There will be so much temptation, and you will give in at some point. That does not make YOU a failure. Just start the process over again with a firm determination to get better.

You will beat this.
Click to expand...
👍 Very good advice! God bless you for helping out someone in need.
 
thestudentAD said:
Will I be heard even if I’m in mortal sin?
Click to expand...
God hears all prayers from everyone even before they know they’re going to pray them. Are you repentant, contrite, and sincere? He knows that as well. Don’t worry about God not having enough mercy or love. He has more love and mercy that you have sins but you have to fight this addiction. God can’t help you if you don’t do what you need to do. Ask the Blessed Mother for help and strength; she brings all to her Son. God bless! 👍
 
Hey, Everyone!
Going to confession tomorrow. I have started a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Haven’t prayed the rosary everyday. But, I have been reading my Bible. I do talk to Jesus. Not at night though, but that’ll change.
 
thestudentAD said:
Hey, Everyone!
Going to confession tomorrow. I have started a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Haven’t prayed the rosary everyday. But, I have been reading my Bible. I do talk to Jesus. Not at night though, but that’ll change.
Click to expand...
Remember that God has more mercy than all our sins put together! He loves you and forgives you so be glad! God bless you and have a sincere confession. 👍
 
thestudentAD said:
Hey, Everyone!
Going to confession tomorrow. I have started a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Haven’t prayed the rosary everyday. But, I have been reading my Bible. I do talk to Jesus. Not at night though, but that’ll change.
Click to expand...
I’m immensely happy for you because you have built a personal relationship with Jesus and decided to go to confession.

God bless you!

Bruno
 
Originally Posted by thestudentAD View Post
Hey everyone…
I’ll admit it. I’m addicted to porn. I started seeing video game sex vids when I was twelve, started masturbating at that time when I started reading erotic scenes and watching them. I first saw my first live action porn vid before my eighteenth or seventeenth birthday. I also watched it under the excuse that it would keep me heterosexual when my OCD came along and I had homosexual thoughts.
I’ve told my Dad… I haven’t told my stepmother. My pastor knows it, along with the other priests. My brothers, thank Heaven, don’t know it. And I don’t want them to see what I see.
I’ve wasted my graduate money on sex chats and sex sites, but it’s not fulfilling. I’ve never had sex… only masturbated.
Dear gosh, I want to get into a good relationship with a woman with an emotional and passionate aspect… and yes, I’m a Catholic. And I know I shouldn’t be doing this stuff. It’s just… so hard to let go, y’know? Sometimes, I’ve thought about writing my own erotic scenes.
What should I do?
Click to expand...
Although I never watched straight up porn I was at one point watching Game Of Thrones which is pretty much the same thing, and what I did is I asked about it on a different forum than this. Yes some of the answers were kind of harsh I guess but it woke me up to confessing all of the episodes that I had watched. To this day I have not watched a single episode more of Game Of Thrones and I would like to keep it that way.
Also as far as Catholics we are so blessed to have the sacrament of reconciliation that no other religion has. So that that through the priest God can shower his divine graces on people and forgive us of our transgretions against him.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top