I'm at Franciscan!

[Madaglan]

Hey everybody. Sorry I haven’t posted in almost a week. I just moved into Franciscan Univeristy of Steubenville last Thursday. I really like the campus, most everyone is friendly, I think that I will enjoy my classes and will learn much from them, and I went to a Divine Liturgy at a Byzantine Catholic church nearby and absolutely fell in love with it. So, there are many good things happening here.

I was just wondering, however, if people here could pray for me on a few things. For one, I am very very shy, and since most Catholics (and most people in general) tend to be extroverted, I have run into several situations which I wish were otherwise. Being shy (indeed, socially anxious) isn’t good for a guy, and I have suffered much loneliness and deep pain these past few days, and I do hope that I meet someone who can be my soul mate. For example, there was this huge dance where all the incoming freshman and graduate students partied. Being quite shy (and having my back locked up because of back problems) I couldn’t dance, although I really wanted to. I nearly ran out of the dance hall because of the pain and went to pray before the Eucharist. I wish I didn’t have to do that.

So, I just ask for your prayers in finding friends on campus who think like me and who are holy. That’s all. I hope that everyone else here online is doing well. I haven’t had a chance to check the posts here since my internet back in the room has yet to be hooked up.

I’m going for my M.A. in Theology, and I look forward to learning Latin theology; and I equally look forward to learning Eastern theology from the Eastern Catholic people on campus with whom I went to Divine Liturgy yesterday.

In any case, pretty soon and I can answer questions in the “Ask the Apologist” section

Later.

 

[ncjohn]

Madaglan:

So, I just ask for your prayers in finding friends on campus who think like me and who are holy.
I’m going for my M.A. in Theology, and I look forward to learning Latin theology; and I equally look forward to learning Eastern theology from the Eastern Catholic people on campus with whom I went to Divine Liturgy yesterday.

In any case, pretty soon and I can answer questions in the “Ask the Apologist” section

Later.

Consider me praying!

Don’t pray for them to think too much like you though. It’s really in being challenged by those who don’t think exactly like you that you come to examine what you think you believe and find out what you really believe. When it comes to faith, ownership is everything. You can’t live out of anyone else’s faith.

Good luck finding your soulmate. Don’t spend too much time looking though. As my son found through his own experience, when he stopped looking, God sent him the one he didn’t know he was looking for. They’ll celebrate their 5th anniversary in January. :clapping:

 

[KCT]

Are you in the dorms? If so, which one? My husband lived in the basement of St. Francis before he moved off campus. —KCT (class of '84)

 

[Madaglan]

Actually, I’m living off campus in a dorm called Trinity East. It’s attached to the Trinity East medical center and is located south of campus.

Please everyone keep on praying for me, especially in finding the friends and comfort that I need, since I tend to be quite shy, and it really hurts. THanks!

 

[Princess_Abby]

It takes a little while to truly make friends. Be at peace and try to relax. Remind yourself that God called you there for a reason, and He will not be outdone in His generosity toward you.

Be open and willing to try new things. Graduate school is an adjustment, just as undergrad is too. Concentrate on studying, praying and having a healthy attitude. As time go on, you will get to know people both in your dorm and classes. Invite a group out for coffee or ice cream if you feel comfortable. Remember to initiate and be confident; don’t wait for your best friend to suddenly just “find” you and know that you’re meant to be best friends forevermore. To have a friend you must be a friend.

Most of all, just be patient both with the experience and with yourself.

I’m praying for you!

 

[puzzleannie]

I am so very glad for you, I could not wish better for you. I am a little surprised by your self-characterization as I would consider you anything but shy. I know a feature of campus life is the voluntary “house” associations where the young men live, pray, work and study together in sodality-fraternity type arrangements. I hope you find a place in such a community, the kids I have talked to find this the key to difference in life at Steubenville from other colleges. Everytime I go there I marvel at the quality of the students and the atmosphere on that campus, and you will fit right in, and find the answers, I hope, to a lot of your questions. check out the latest issue of Newsweek on spirituality, as Franciscan U is featured in one segment with several pictures.

by the way the kids I have talked to also say it is the best place to be to look for members of the opposite sex to become friends with, date and consider as potential spouses sharing the same values and goals. Hey, guy, I think you are in like flynn.

 

[Gwyn]

All the best!
That is a beautiful University. Visited it 13 years ago and was amazed - very nice place. The friend I visited was renting a private home off campus while doing her MBA.

 

[Madaglan]

Originally Quoted by puzzleannie:

I am so very glad for you, I could not wish better for you. I am a little surprised by your self-characterization as I would consider you anything but shy.

Yeah, but if you met me you would think otherwise

Actually, I have no problem talking with people online. I’m actually having much less of a problem in talking with people 1-on-1. What is really hard for me is feeling comfortable in groups. I can talk with people of the opposite gender now, which is big advance from before when I couldn’t even do that, but I still feel that I am saying the wrong things and that the other person is thinking certain things about what I say. It’s a bad habit, and I’m trying to stop it.

by the way the kids I have talked to also say it is the best place to be to look for members of the opposite sex to become friends with, date and consider as potential spouses sharing the same values and goals. Hey, guy, I think you are in like flynn.

Could you maybe pray that this is true for my case? Pleeeez Thanks!

 

[Brenda_V]

Madaglan,

Woo, hoo! Franciscan U. of Steubenville is a wonderful school.

Besides the all important prayer - which has already been suggested and I frimly agree, try going to the Caf during the busier times - look for a table full of people that has one or two chairs left and just ask if you can join them. Generally speaking the answer will be “yes”.

Check out the TV lounge in your dorm - another place to get to know others, yes, they will be men but they might help you in sitting with and talking to the women on campus in other situations.

Now on a semi-joking, semi-serious note. I have a 25 yo daughter who is shy and graduated from Franciscan Spring of 2003 with her BS in Early Childhood Education. Being as the population of “available” males to females is extremely small at Franciscan (a lot of pre-Theology, heading for Seminary as well as a higher woman to man student population).

We are Latin (Roman) Catholic and somewhat versed in our Faith.

I also can see how you can be very out going on a list or forum than in person. I am more like that although I can be very outspoken in person too. I am shy but not painfully shy.

Prayers for you and your new experiences at Franciscan!

Brenda V.

 

[kristacecilia]

Hi!! FUS Alumna here. Class of '04- so fairly recently. Tommy More Girl, even. My two younger sisters both still attend, one of them is in Austria this semester.

Go to the JC, top floor by the door to the Pub. There is a board on the wall there (unless they have moved it) that says “Grad/Non-Trad”. It lists all the activites that are only for grad and non-traditional students. If the board is not there, ask at the desk (right next to where the board should be) and they can tell you where it got moved to. They did a ton of renovations in there recently.

Second, attend Mass on campus during the week if you can, you’ll meet lots of people there. Eat in the Caf, meet more people. Being in Trinity East will be a bit hard, but you just have to spend more time on campus to meet people.

Go Barons!

If you take the shuttle, look for a girl with lots of red, curly hair (although, sometimes it isn’t always curly). Her name is Cheryl, and she’s my sister’s housemate. She is supernice and loves to talk, but is also shy herself. She is very holy, too!! Say hi to her, and tell her you heard about her from Krista (Kelly’s sister).

Go to campus activities, there are always a ton at the beginning of the year. You’ll meet tons of people in your classes and such, and you’ll make lots of friends like you. I promise!!

If you ever just want to talk FUS or need more advice or need to know something about the campus, feel free to PM me!

 

[Mom_of_one]

I am shy as well, and I understand how hard it can be to make friends. I was able to make friends quite easily at Franciscan because so many people love the Lord and that extends to loving others. Whatever you love to do, do it! If you want to do pro-life work, join a group or two. If there are study groups for your classes, join them. Just get yourself out there. Starting out with small groups may be the best way to go, though.

But most of all, relax. It may take some time to make friends, but it’ll be easier if you are not tense about making some. And it will not help your back at all if you are tense.

I was considering going back to visit my alma mater this fall. Maybe you can be my tour guide and show me all the new stuff that has been built.

 

[Mom_of_one]

Wow, it sounds like you’ve got a couple of in’s with women already!

 

[Madaglan]

Hey. I am back! I just am coming back from lunch. I couldn’t find anybody I know, so I asked some people if I could sit next to them. They said yes. I tried talking with them, introducing myself and so forth, and they answered where they were from, etc., but then they turned back away from me and started talking with one another. It really hurt.

I wonder if there are other people on campus who are hurt because of this. I wish I could find them.

In any case, I have my first class tonight. Maybe I’ll meet some smart people there.

Right now though my heart hurts a lot, and my stomach feels queasy.

 

[kristacecilia]

Aww… I am sorry.

Just because it’s Franciscan doesn’t mean everyone is nice, unfortunately.

Keep trying! You will make friends, I promise!

 

[proud2bcatholic]

Hello,

I was at Trinity East last fall. Let me guess you went to Divine Liturgy with Todd and the others, be careful he’ll try to convert you to the Byzantine Rite .

What room are you in? I was in room 109.

Anyways tell everybody that Brian says hi, and he’s sorry he couldn’t make it back there.

Make friends with people at Trinity East. If you would like to eat dinner with them at the caf, they usually eat on the bottom floor next to the windows.

Anyways, just take your time, you will befriend some people.

God bless.

 

[Brenda_V]

Hey, you did good. Introducing yourself and getting a little bit of information is pretty good. Don’t be afraid to try this trick at several other tables - include asking what their majors are in your questions and then ask about that - people often like to talk about themselves .

Any way, my daughter, the Franciscan graduate said that another place to meet people is in the JCWilliams center especially in the Pub where you are more likely to find Graduate/Non-Trad students who are more in the same place you are - they may be new to Franciscan and looking for friends too, not returning students which I will guess is what happened today. You sat down with some students who hadn’t seen each other all summer and they did talk to you but wanted to find out about each others summers so they seemed to be ignoring you. Don’t give up on this one though, you might be surprised.

Another place is Heavenly Grounds the coffee house. Down by John Vianney Hall.

Try some of these other places as you are more likely to meet up with Graduate students who are more your age and more in the same place in many other aspects of your life.

My daughter also suggested that you go to all the Graduate/Non-Trad student events.

Give it a little bit of time, Pray about it. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you over your anxieties and to help you with the right words to say when you meet people.

(sorry the below is kind of long)
If it helps you at all, I will tell you how my husband and I had met. I was a Freshman and he was a Senior in College - although I already had some college credits under my belt I was not considered the normal freshman.

We both ended up taking this class that neither of us needed for our degrees and since it was right after lunch many of us would arrive a bit early and sit and talk. There were a group of us (me being the youngest) who would sit in the desks near the door and he would come in (he was the oldest) and sit one aisle over about three chairs back from where I was sitting.

It took him almost the entire semester before he got up the courage to actually talk to me personally, he would talk to the group in general but what happened was he started by moving up until he was sitting in the chair one aisle over and one seat back from me, introduced himself with his full name (first and last) and wanted to know what my name was. I gave him my first name only - I was such a tease as I figured out he wanted my full name- he had to ask for my last name. I went home that day, told my older sister that this cute guy in class asked for my full name and he was probably going to call me and sure enough, he had screwed up the courage to call me that night to ask me out on a date which of course I accepted. We have known each other now close to 29 years and have been married almost 27.

Brenda V.

 

[Bobby_A.Greene]

Madaglan:

Hey everybody. Sorry I haven’t posted in almost a week. I just moved into Franciscan Univeristy of Steubenville last Thursday.

Oooooooh, I am green with envy! Good For You!

I went to the University of Massachusetts at Boston when I got out of the Navy . I would have loved to have gone to Franciscan University and will probably purchase one of their fleece jackets over the internet I am such a fan of that school. Again, good for you!

 

[montanaman]

Hey Mag,

I went to Franciscan for about a year back in 1994-95. I can totally relate to you. If not for an odd friendship I forged with a guy about fifteen years older than me, it truly would have been the most brutal year of my life. I was painfully shy, too. I wasn’t exactly sure why I was there, and my lack of faith and conviction made 10 hours a day of studying theology pure misery.

Eventually I made friends, but most of the time I was in the Port yelling at God or writing really angry journal entries about Adam and Eve and Original Sin. I turned 21 that year, too, so I spent some time in the student union building playing lots of ping-pong and drinking those horrible Heinekins…

Anyway, don’t worry. If you’re true to God and yourself you won’t be able to help making friends. In fact, if you’re anything like me, you’ll spend an extraordinary amount of time trying to get time ALONE!

 

[montanaman]

Oh, and is Dr. Regis Martin still there? My girlfriend and I have been talking about taking a trip up to Franciscan U. to “stalk some brains.” She’s thinking of converting, and I’ve been wanting to go back to the scene of the crime for a long time. (I pretty much fell away from the Church for a decade after going to FUS). I’d love to go pray in the Port again–it was one of the few places I ever felt at peace in this walk…

 

[JMJ_Pinoy]

Madaglan:

Hey everybody. Sorry I haven’t posted in almost a week. I just moved into Franciscan Univeristy of Steubenville last Thursday. I really like the campus, most everyone is friendly, I think that I will enjoy my classes and will learn much from them, and I went to a Divine Liturgy at a Byzantine Catholic church nearby and absolutely fell in love with it. So, there are many good things happening here.

I was just wondering, however, if people here could pray for me on a few things. For one, I am very very shy, and since most Catholics (and most people in general) tend to be extroverted, I have run into several situations which I wish were otherwise. Being shy (indeed, socially anxious) isn’t good for a guy, and I have suffered much loneliness and deep pain these past few days, and I do hope that I meet someone who can be my soul mate. For example, there was this huge dance where all the incoming freshman and graduate students partied. Being quite shy (and having my back locked up because of back problems) I couldn’t dance, although I really wanted to. I nearly ran out of the dance hall because of the pain and went to pray before the Eucharist. I wish I didn’t have to do that.

So, I just ask for your prayers in finding friends on campus who think like me and who are holy. That’s all. I hope that everyone else here online is doing well. I haven’t had a chance to check the posts here since my internet back in the room has yet to be hooked up.

I’m going for my M.A. in Theology, and I look forward to learning Latin theology; and I equally look forward to learning Eastern theology from the Eastern Catholic people on campus with whom I went to Divine Liturgy yesterday.

In any case, pretty soon and I can answer questions in the “Ask the Apologist” section

Later.

Congratulations! I’m sure you’ll enjoy your college experience at FUS! I’ve heard nothing but positive comments regarding the university. I’ve been keeping contact with some of FUS’s current students, alumni, and an admissions counselor because I’d really like to attend FUS. You may want to try their “households” or clubs/activities to meet new friends. If you have a Myspace, you may want to join one of the FUS groups there. I’m in an FUS group on Myspace and they’re really friendly and welcoming. They’ve given me so much great advice and answered so many of my questions. If you’d like a link to my FUS group, just let me know.

God Bless!