I'm bisexual and becoming Catholic next week HELP

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chasingcars

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Okay so first of all, I’ll be received into the Church next week and I’m really happy and nervous at the same time. The issue I need a lot of help with is same-sex attraction which is causing damage to my spiritual life. I think I was about 11 or 12 when I realized that I’m bisexual 😦 I’m now 18. What makes this even worse is that I’m more into women than men and I’m a woman myself…
I have absolutely no problem with the Church’s teachings about this issue and I fully believe that homosexual acts are gravely immoral.
However, it feels terrible that I can’t ever be in a romantic relationship or have sex with a woman and that I’m gonna have to live the rest of my life quelling my sexuality. Can I be good enough as a Catholic though I’m not straight? I’m so scared how I can deal with ssa in the future and if it will affect my Catholic faith.
It hurts me that I can’t be normal and I feel like a “second-class Christian” because of this. I’m so ashamed. Can anyone please help?
 
It hurts me that I can’t be normal and I feel like a “second-class Christian” because of this. I’m so ashamed. Can anyone please help
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You actually are a “first class” Christian who had been entrusted to carry a first class Cross… and crosses are what is needed to save the world!
 
I am a married heterosexual, so I honestly can’t say I understand how you feel or what you’re going through. But I am sorry for your struggles. 😦

That said, I don’t know anyone who really feels “normal” all the time. We all generally do struggle with particular temptations and sins, and at the time, we tend to feel that we’re alone in that struggle, surrounded by holy people, and it feels like, “I am the only one who can’t seem to overcome this kind of temptation.” But remember that it’s not a competition with others, or among Christians. It’s a battle with ourselves, our own temptations, and each of us fights our own interior battles (though we can certainly help and support each other along the way).

You are not alone. Ask God for help to love, serve, and obey Him more each day. Tell Him your struggles. Silently offer up your heart and life, your joys and sorrows, your accomplishments and disappointments, with the Offerings at Mass.

I’m sure you’re aware that sexual temptations are common today, regardless of sexual orientation. We all have our crosses, and rarely are they easy to carry. But in Christ, there is hope! You might want to read the stories of the saints; many of them struggled with various sins; they were not perfect, either (except for the Blessed Virgin Mary). They repented, they confessed, and with God’s help, they persevered. 🙂

Remember too, that when we fall, we don’t necessarily fail, thanks be to God! We only fail if we give up and decide that our sin is bigger than God’s Mercy. When/if you stumble and/or fall, go to Confession and make things right with God.

You are not the sum of your desires or your sins; you are a person, equal in dignity to anyone else and part of the Body of Christ by virtue of your baptism. You are not “second-class,” and are no less Christian or Catholic because of your ssa than anyone else is for their struggles with temptation. You CAN be “good enough” as a Catholic.

I’d suggest, though, that you shoot for more than just “good enough.” With God’s grace, you can be a saint. We should all strive for that. 👍

I will pray for you! :gopray2:
 
chasingcars said:
Okay so first of all, I’ll be received into the Church next week and I’m really happy and nervous at the same time. The issue I need a lot of help with is same-sex attraction which is causing damage to my spiritual life. I think I was about 11 or 12 when I realized that I’m bisexual 😦 I’m now 18. What makes this even worse is that I’m more into women than men and I’m a woman myself…
I have absolutely no problem with the Church’s teachings about this issue and I fully believe that homosexual acts are gravely immoral.
However, it feels terrible that I can’t ever be in a romantic relationship or have sex with a woman and that I’m gonna have to live the rest of my life quelling my sexuality. Can I be good enough as a Catholic though I’m not straight? I’m so scared how I can deal with ssa in the future and if it will affect my Catholic faith.
It hurts me that I can’t be normal and I feel like a “second-class Christian” because of this. I’m so ashamed. Can anyone please help?
Click to expand...
Hello!

Maybe this video can help you.

I’m not sure what kind of a cross that would be like, but God must really love you a lot if He wants you all for Himself, is what I think. 😃
 
Actually, far from being a “terrible” thing, remaining chaste is an absolutely wonderful thing. What would really be terrible is allowing temptation to poison your soul and separate you from God. If you’re coming at it from the perspective that, oh, how terrible it would be to never be able to engage in homosexual relations, then, yes, you might not enjoy your life in Christ as you should. But if your perspective is, you know, through the grace of God I am able to grow closer to Him every day in purity and faith and do not need my disorders and weaknesses and temptations to define me, then I think you’re going to find life a lot more joyful as a Catholic.

I’m married and I really love my wife, but I assure you that I do find other women attractive. If I spent the rest of my marriage groaning about how “terrible” it would be to be “stuck” with my wife, then I am certain that my marriage would not be a very good one. I see very clearly that there are other attractive women, and sometimes I’m even tempted by them, but my heart is fixed firmly on my wife and, even more than that, our Lord, and that makes my vocation to marriage much less “terrible,” in fact, it makes it holy.

Who cares if you find other women attractive? It is a cross, a temptation, and you know that. Be grateful that at least you also find men attractive, which means that you stand a good possibility of getting married and having a normal family life. Instead of fretting over your temptations, spend your time being in awe of a God who gives you the strength to resist them and serve Him.
 
You are not alone. A lot of Christians struggle with chastity.
 
Have been chaste for more than 5 years now. It only gets easier. Don’t listen to those who tell you to define yourself by your sexual pleasures. In the end is just you and God.
 
You are normal,there are no “classes of christian” dont allow anyone to impose this on you
 
Phew,
First God is rejoicing that a child of His is coming home. The angels in choir that day will be singing the Hallelujah chorus. Seek ye first, the Kingdom of God and everything else will be added unto you.
Now, You do have a dilemma. I believe I understand that you are a female w mostly and attraction for females. But men excite you as well. at 67yo and female and living near ft.Bragg. Let me tell you there is fine picking out there. I am married 48years in Aug. Fell in love at first sight. Cute story. He still looks good. Still calls me beautiful w 90# that need to go somewhere else. He never changes weight. Once he did, and all I could do was laugh at him when he would raid the fridge at 0200hrs in his BVD’s It’s just how the fat made his stomach stick out. Anyway w his metabolism it fell off.I digress.
You need to go to counseling and find a counselor that will align w what I feel(I am going to get hung here by the readers) God would want. Reasoning. You are a female. You look like a female. You like men. You are tempted w females. All of us females can look at a woman and envy her boobs, her legs, her style. I never feel like I want to go to bed w her.If I could be a body snatcher and keep my head and give her my body eh! I digress again. A counselor can desensitize your inclination to desire woman. Maybe you can do it yourself as you only have body envy, like me. I would say when you find the guy find one who gears for a 6 pack of his abs and likes to go out doing outdoor things w you. Mind set a pic of your family. Husband, wife and children. I will say a child that grew up w 2 fathers and loves them made a public statement that she would have preferred a Dad and a Mom and feels it was wrong for 2 Dad’s The fashion gay couple (I can’t recall their names) Coupla and Gabana?? Anyway, spoke out against same sex marriage The gay community is not buying their brand right now. Funny, though huh. The question for all of us is are we going to do what we want to do what feels good for us no matter what. OR are we going to follow God’s rules and follow the map the Bible gives us. The clergy, as we found out, is not perfect but the lives they ruined are innumerable. As a nurse, I asked approx… 50 of my pts dying w aids if they had been molested as children and they were. My brother was molested at the age of 11 and he was bisexual. There are other reasons now and it is getting all new names. gender identity crisis, etc.
We can go from birth to death without sex and be happy. Our purpose that God gives us is the most important thing to find out and accomplish.
So, God loves you and is happy you are in His church. We will love you. Your problem you should talk to your confessor and work w him during your spiritual growth. Jesus is your best friend. Always ask WHAT WOULD JESUS DO. Find that counselor to work on desensitizing your pull toward women. Don’t commit to anyone till your soul is safe w Jesus and the confusion is gone. What Joy there will be when you will be unencumbered. HE WHO THE SUN SETS FREE IS FREE INDEED.
The homosexual community has every right for a civil ceremony which can be made as beautiful as a church ceremony. They should have insurance rights, living will rights, death will rights. rights to visit in hospitals. A civil service does all that. Sodom and Gomorrah is a pretty strong statement. It is curious that you can trace gay behavior in the Sumarian, Greek, and Roman culture.I find it still gross. There is feces up there. Your anal sphincter gets loose. One of my pts was leaving brown spots on the stretcher. God put holes for certain things and that one has a nasty job. Woman have to buy assist devices. It is too complicated.
End on good note here. God lovesyou, We love you. You have an exciting journey w Jesus your best friend. What would Jesus do? Good thermometer on all our behaviors.
TADA.
IN Christ’s love 🙂
tweedlealice God be with me w the flack :confused:
 
A prayer for purity from St.Aloysius,

Dear St. Aloysius ,the church honors you as the angelic youth because you lived purely before God on earth. i come to you w my whole heart and mind. Oh, dear Saint, I really need you! I fell the strong temptation of the world, the flesh and the devil. I am very weak and inconstant. I run to you St. Aloysius, and beg you to intercede that I might surrender my lust to God and that I might receive from HIm the peace of His presence and the victory of His cross. I pray for others who suffer from this addiction, that God would give them His joy and peace. Amen

Glorious St. Anthony,I salute you a good servant of Christ, and a special friend of God. You were once favored to hold the Christ Child in your arms as you cherished His word in your heart.Today I place all my cares, temptations, and anxieties in your hands.I resolve ever to honor you by imitating your example.
Powerful Patron, model of purity and victor over fleshly impulses, please win for me, and for all devoted to you,perfect purity of body, mind and heart. I promise by my example and counsel to help others grow in the knowledge, love and service of God. Amen

People, including our priests of the recent past, have forgotten purity. This is of mind=no pornography or watching Xrated movies. It is celibacy for all non-married individuals. Homosexuals would be celibate their entire lives. Their lover is Jesus. St. John of the Cross wrote in Spanish and it bothered me at first… His wording started out that my"lover" comes to me in the night and awakens me. But, I can’t catch him. I follow him through the door. Something like that. Then, the Holy Spirit reveled to me St.John could not find the word in Spanish to express his love for His God except to use the Passionate form. Because you see, when you ask God into your heart, to guide your life and submit to His rules, you are Passionately in love w God as you would be a worldly lover. One cannot put the Bible down. He seals the words in your heart. You look at humans and the effect isn’t quite the same. You are on the mountain top.Eventually, I came down enough to love my husband as that is the will of God. But all I have is a gift from God. I rejoice in God my Savior. I am a sinner saved by His grace.
IN Christ’s Love
tweedlealice. copy those prayers. we all need them
 
Praying to the Holy Spirit to give you guidance, direction, strength, fortitude & wisdom in your time of need.
 
Of COURSE you are “good enough.” There are countless priests who are heterosexual, but must forego sexual relationships with women. You sound like a good person. Welcome to the Church! By the way, you ARE normal. 🙂
 
Try to fall in love with Jesus and read the Song of Songs. It is between the soul and Christ. Make Jesus your only love and divine spouse.
 
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