I'm deeply troubled...the devil is laughing

[cardenio]

Paris Blues:

Well, just to be SUPER SAFE, I’m going to sleep in tomorrow.

YIKES! Is being scrupulous a sin too? (see, here goes again!:banghead: )

Yes, because it is doubting God’s mercy. Tell satan to shut up and go to hell. He’s enjoying keeping you from the Sacraments. Don’t let him.

 

[Magicsilence]

Paris Blues:

Well, just to be SUPER SAFE, I’m going to sleep in tomorrow.

YIKES! Is being scrupulous a sin too? (see, here goes again!:banghead: )

Far from Paris doubting God, it seems to me that out of sincere respect for Him she is refraining from recieving the Eucharist in order to not commit a sacrilege (though i dont believe it would be in this case).

Being a little bit scrupulous is NO BAD THING when you have just converted. Speaking as a lapsed Catholic, scrupulosity will set in heavily just before your first communion, and will gradually subside in 2-3 weeks. Do not worry, but trust in the Lord.

In Christ.

Andre.

 

[Paris_Blues]

I realized that I wasn’t trusting our Lord good enough and I felt bad about it so I told our Lord that I would take the forum people’s word for it (you guys!!) that my sins were forgiven that I forgot to confess and would go ahead and trust and go to Mass on Thanksgiving.

I did go. Sitting in the pews, I felt that scrupulous garbage bitting at me again but quickly prayed to our Lord and our Lady for trust and then I felt peace, knowing that you guys were right. I recieved the Eucharist.

That’s when I knew I need to trust MORE in our Lord!

 

[puzzleannie]

don’t begin your new-found peace in the sacrament of penance and reconciliation with these unhealthy anxieties. Every sin on your soul, including the ones you forgot, were forgiven at your first confession. Every sin since then was forgiven at your next confession, and so forth. Form the habit of a daily examination of conscience (about 5 minutes to review the events of the day) as part of your night prayer, ending with a good act of contrition and Our Father every night befor bed. Confess regularly, and you will never again worry about “forgetting” any sins.

 

[puzzleannie]

Paris Blues:

I realized that I wasn’t trusting our Lord good enough and I felt bad about it so I told our Lord that I would take the forum people’s word for it (you guys!!) that my sins were forgiven that I forgot to confess and would go ahead and trust and go to Mass on Thanksgiving.

take your direction from the priest in confession, not us. we are just giving advice based on our own experience. If the priest gave you absolution you are absolved. He is the one to guide you on what is a mortal and venial sin because only he is privy to what you tell him. Do not get in the bad habit of making confession to outsiders, save it for the confessional.

 

[hurst]

All these posts are merely focusing on whether God has forgiven someone who goes to confession, and that “being scrupulous” is something to simply turn off.

I don’t think it does anyone who is being scrupulous a service to scold them for being so. Doesn’t it only aggravate the problem of someone who is trying to reverse the habit of being careless? Someone who is being scrupulous should rather first be commended for caring, but gently guided into the proper priorties.

The fact of the matter is that if we did forget a mortal sin, we must mention it in our next confession, which should be as soon as possible. It is good to add at the end of our confession “and for any other sin I may have forgotten”.

Also, a scrupulous person is not necessarily sure that they are in fact being honest with themselves about their sins. They fear self-deceit for a good reason. Underneath all of this is likely a hidden vein of sins from their past that is influencing their current thought process. Something is nagging them because something is there that needs to be dealt with. This should be acknowledged. But a scrupulous person should be advised that they are called to realize they can’t save themselves from this, that it requires trust in Jesus, that God will reveal these hidden sins to them as they draw closer to Him, and that they should be ready to confess and renounce them as they are made conscious of them.

When we sin, we make ourselves a slave to sin. Being forgiven does not automatically cause us to stop sinning. We must “go and sin no more”. The sacrament of penance makes us stronger against repeating the sin, and makes us more aware of it when we get near to sinning again. We must work at overcoming the interior workings of our deceptive heart which recalls sin and repeats it as a reflex in our thoughts and then in our words and actions. It is perfectly acceptable to confess to a sin already confessed if we still sense a sorrow for it, because the grace of the sacrament will again be applied to that and strengthen us more.

The sacrament is not only for forgiving sins, but for obtaining the grace to overcome them.

I recommend the book “Frequent Confession” by Benedict Baur, who covers this topic.

hurst

 

[javelin]

Paris,

Remember that to commit mortal sin is to commit a grave sin, with full consent, knowing that it is gravely sinful.

So, if later on you realize that something you did before was gravely wrong, it is still not mortally sinful because you did not know it was gravely wrong when you did it. If you went and did it again, though, it would be a mortal sin, because now you recognize the sinful nature of the act.

Basically, if you have any doubt whether something you did earlier is mortal, it is not.

HOWEVER, you should still confess these things, as they are still sinful (though not mortally sinful), and sacramental confession will help you overcome them and strengthen you against committing them in the future. Even so, we are forgiven the debt we owe for our sins every time we ask for it, and that debt is totally forgiven.

It helps me to think about it in monetary terms:

Say I owe God a large sum of money in payment for choices I’ve made. Although I’m not sure of the exact amount I owe, I know it’s big because I know of the major things I’ve done to incur the debt. When I go to God to ask Him to forgive the debt, I don’t just say “Forgive me this part, and that part, and this part”. Rather, I ask the whole debt to be forgiven, citing as much of the debt as I know so that God sees I understand how I incurred the debt to begin with. God honors that and forgives my whole debt. When I leave the confessional, my debt has been completely forgiven – paid back, as it were, by Christ Jesus Himself. At that point, I “owe” God nothing. When I again sin against Him, though, my debt begins again, and it is through seeking forgiveness that it is again repaid by Jesus.

Does this help?

Also, as so many others have said, our debt to God is forgiven whenever we ask Him, even ouside the confessional, provided the sin is not mortal. As I pointed out earlier, if you have committed mortal sin, you would know it because you must know it in order for it to be mortal. So seek His forgiveness regularly and humbly, and receive the Eucharist whenever you can so it can strengthen you against the enemy.

Peace,
javelin

 

[Paris_Blues]

hurst:

All these posts are merely focusing on whether God has forgiven someone who goes to confession, and that “being scrupulous” is something to simply turn off.

I don’t think it does anyone who is being scrupulous a service to scold them for being so. Doesn’t it only aggravate the problem of someone who is trying to reverse the habit of being careless? Someone who is being scrupulous should rather first be commended for caring, but gently guided into the proper priorties.

The fact of the matter is that if we did forget a mortal sin, we must mention it in our next confession, which should be as soon as possible. It is good to add at the end of our confession “and for any other sin I may have forgotten”.

Also, a scrupulous person is not necessarily sure that they are in fact being honest with themselves about their sins. They fear self-deceit for a good reason. Underneath all of this is likely a hidden vein of sins from their past that is influencing their current thought process. Something is nagging them because something is there that needs to be dealt with. This should be acknowledged. But a scrupulous person should be advised that they are called to realize they can’t save themselves from this, that it requires trust in Jesus, that God will reveal these hidden sins to them as they draw closer to Him, and that they should be ready to confess and renounce them as they are made conscious of them.

When we sin, we make ourselves a slave to sin. Being forgiven does not automatically cause us to stop sinning. We must “go and sin no more”. The sacrament of penance makes us stronger against repeating the sin, and makes us more aware of it when we get near to sinning again. We must work at overcoming the interior workings of our deceptive heart which recalls sin and repeats it as a reflex in our thoughts and then in our words and actions. It is perfectly acceptable to confess to a sin already confessed if we still sense a sorrow for it, because the grace of the sacrament will again be applied to that and strengthen us more.

The sacrament is not only for forgiving sins, but for obtaining the grace to overcome them.

I recommend the book “Frequent Confession” by Benedict Baur, who covers this topic.

hurst

Oh for crying out loud! The scrupulous garbage is creeping up again on moi! This is a pain in the butt!

Now Hurst, you’re contradicting what the rest of the posters put! No doubt the devil loves doing this. See, you can’t find truth with contradictions.

Look, I told all the sins I did to the priest for my 1st Confession and was absolved. Then I remembered some more sins and went Saturday to my 2nd Confession and was absolved. I was unaware of any other sins the day I was confirmed.

Then I remembered a sin I forgot to mention on either Monday or Tuesday but was unaware of it at that time of the two Confessions(though I would’ve said it if I remembered it at that time).

I was planning to go to Mass on Thanksgiving but told myself no, because I still needed to confess that first so would wait until Saturday. I wasn’t sure so that’s why I got on this forum and asked.

It was the unknown that I didn’t know but was the reality.

Therefore, people told me that all my sins were forgiven even the ones that I forgot unintentionally and really want to turn away from them. So trusting that what they said were true (because I didn’t know!), I prayed about it then trusted our Lord and went to Mass on Thanksgiving.

Now you’re saying the opposite of what they said and now it’s making me start to be troubled again. Sensitive person I am no doubt.

And worse, now it seems to me like I couldn’t take the words from the people here (your sins were forgiven even the ones you forgot unintentionally) and trust that they were true in the CC and what! Did I just commit a sacrilege because I didn’t know and from trusting in our Lord?

 

[Mijoy2]

I think it is natural to do what you are doing Paris. It is also unnecassary. Next time you go to confession tell the priest you keep remembering mortal sins of your past, that at this moment you wish to ask forgiveness for all future remembered sins of your past.

I went 35 years between confessions. I was assured in the confessional that I was absolved of all sins. I half-jokingly stated that I would need to write a book, and a longer one at that, then Saint Augustine wrote in order to truly attempt to address all of my past sins. This got a chuckle out of the priest and an assurance it was unnecassary. Relax Paris.

 

[spiritblows]

Dear Paris,
There is an excellent Catholic organisation called ‘Scrupuous Anonymous’ to help you. Here is an article by it’s founder.

Scrupulosity And How To Overcome It

By:
Fr. Thomas M. Santa, a Redemptorist priest, holds masters degrees in religious education and divinity. He is director of Scrupulous Anonymous and president and publisher of St. Louis-based Liguori Publications. His book Understanding Scrupulosity is available from Catholic Answers (1-800-291-8000).

 

[Paris_Blues]

javelin:

Paris,

Remember that to commit mortal sin is to commit a grave sin, with full consent, knowing that it is gravely sinful.

So, if later on you realize that something you did before was gravely wrong, it is still not mortally sinful because you did not know it was gravely wrong when you did it. If you went and did it again, though, it would be a mortal sin, because now you recognize the sinful nature of the act.

Basically, if you have any doubt whether something you did earlier is mortal, it is not.

HOWEVER, you should still confess these things, as they are still sinful (though not mortally sinful), and sacramental confession will help you overcome them and strengthen you against committing them in the future. Even so, we are forgiven the debt we owe for our sins every time we ask for it, and that debt is totally forgiven.

It helps me to think about it in monetary terms:

Say I owe God a large sum of money in payment for choices I’ve made. Although I’m not sure of the exact amount I owe, I know it’s big because I know of the major things I’ve done to incur the debt. When I go to God to ask Him to forgive the debt, I don’t just say “Forgive me this part, and that part, and this part”. Rather, I ask the whole debt to be forgiven, citing as much of the debt as I know so that God sees I understand how I incurred the debt to begin with. God honors that and forgives my whole debt. When I leave the confessional, my debt has been completely forgiven – paid back, as it were, by Christ Jesus Himself. At that point, I “owe” God nothing. When I again sin against Him, though, my debt begins again, and it is through seeking forgiveness that it is again repaid by Jesus.

Does this help?

Also, as so many others have said, our debt to God is forgiven whenever we ask Him, even ouside the confessional, provided the sin is not mortal. As I pointed out earlier, if you have committed mortal sin, you would know it because you must know it in order for it to be mortal. So seek His forgiveness regularly and humbly, and receive the Eucharist whenever you can so it can strengthen you against the enemy.

Peace,
javelin

Does this help? Yes and no.

First of all, I want to point out that I only remember ONLY ONE sin I forgot, okay? I am working on it. However, I was told that I was forgiven that one even though I unaware of it at the two times of Confession. So I believed the people here so went to Mass and went to Confession for my third time this past Saturday and didn’t mention it because (1) I forgot about it and (2) I trusted that I was absolved from it due to the fact I was unaware of it.

I shouldn’t be making this harder than it is though I’m famous for that in a way.

 

[javelin]

Paris Blues:

Now you’re saying the opposite of what they said and now it’s making me start to be troubled again. Sensitive person I am no doubt.

Read hurst’s post again; I don’t think he contradicted anyone.

I think his main point was that it is OK for you to be a bit scrupulous – it helps you identify sin in your life for the purpose of avoiding that sin in the future. He did not say past, unremembered sins were not forgiven.

They are. The priest does not cofer “partial” absolution. You are always given complete absolution.

Peace,
javelin

 

[Paris_Blues]

javelin:

The priest does not cofer “partial” absolution. You are always given complete absolution.

Peace,
javelin

Then if I know I’m given complete absolution, then why the heck do some people here keep telling me to “oh, go back and tell the priest the sins you forgot to confess”?

This is what is getting more confused (and no doubt leading me to scrupulous.

Maybe I should change my user name to Miss Scrupulous instead of Paris Blues.

 

[Paris_Blues]

I think the main reason why I can get so darn scrupulous is because I’m recieving the MOST SACRED Eucharist and taking the Eucharist with sin on my soul is the LAST THING I want to do.

I’d rather burn in Hell than to recieve the Eucharist with sin on my soul.

THAT’S WHY!!!

 

[Sandtigress]

Poor thing, you’re really worked up about this, aren’t you? There aren’t any hug smilies, or I would give you one.

The general rule is that if you have forgotten to confess a sin, you are still absolved from it, but you should make a commitment to mention it the next time you go to confession. But you are given absolution for it. As others have said, if you purposefully hid the fact that you sinned, out of shame or pride for instance, you would not be granted absolution for that, but that’s not what you did.

You are forgiven, sweetie, don’t let it worry you any more! You haven’t done anything wrong by going to Mass and receiving the Eucharist.

 

[javelin]

Paris Blues:

Does this help? Yes and no.

Good, at least some of it was useful!
Paris Blues:

First of all, I want to point out that I only remember ONLY ONE sin I forgot, okay? I am working on it.

Good, as this is what God asks of us – that we work on it
Paris Blues:

However, I was told that I was forgiven that one even though I unaware of it at the two times of Confession.

Take heart, for you were told correctly.
Paris Blues:

So I believed the people here so went to Mass and went to Confession for my third time this past Saturday and didn’t mention it because (1) I forgot about it and (2) I trusted that I was absolved from it due to the fact I was unaware of it.

Going to Mass and receiving were both good. No sacrilege.

You do not need to mention that sin in sacramental confession in order to receive forgiveness. The forgiveness has already been granted, as others have said.

It is good for you, however, to confess the sin to receive spiritual guidance from your confessor and spiritual fortitude to avoid that sin in the future. You may need neither to stay away from it, in which case you are fine to completely forget about it. God already has – it is as far away as “the East is from the West”.

Peace,
javelin

 

[javelin]

Paris Blues:

Then if I know I’m given complete absolution, then why the heck do some people here keep telling me to “oh, go back and tell the priest the sins you forgot to confess”?

Telling them after the fact is not for forgiveness, but to obtain spiritual guidance from the confessor and to ask God’s strength to help you avoid the sin in the future.

Maybe it will help to know that people go to confession all the time with little or no need for actual forgiveness. They obtain forgiveness from venial sins whenever they sincerely ask God to forgive them. Sacramental confession is good for many other things, though, as it is an avenue for God’s Grace to transform and strengthen us. Even though we are forgiven our debt to God, we at times still require extra Grace to put our sins behind us. For example, some people don’t forgive themselves long after God has already forgiven them. Confession can help people move beyond their sinful human nature to look with hope to a future as a holy child of God.

Take heart that you have been adopted by God and will be in His family as long as your heart desires.

Peace,
javelin

 

[Philthy]

Paris Blues:

You’re right, I am torturing myself - not on purpose though.

But seriously, I REALLY don’t want to recieve the Eucharist with mortal sins in me!

You will never feel worthy to receive the body and blood soul and divinity of our Lord. This is not a problem - it means you “get it”. It is a gift of which we are not worthy EXCEPT that He wills that we ACCEPT it…and we do with fear and awe.
Paris Blues:

…but hey, I’ve never heard the parish I go to say the “I confess to Almight God and to you my brothers and sisters that I have sinned through my own fault…” except only two times (and I’ve been attending there for a year now) and I ain’t gonna take a risk!

Yes, but they ask you to call to mind your sins, no? Which is followed by “Lord have mercy, Christ have Mercy, Lord have Mercy” Is that not asking forgiveness? In addition, after the consecration I think, we all say,“Lord I am not worthy to recieve you but only say the word and I shall be healed” Is that not a confession and request for forgiveness? You are covered.
Now, as I am quite certain your confessor has told you, stop dwelling on your failures, accept the forgiveness granted you by the death and resurrection of our Lord and give thanks to God for being so merciful. And by all means, relax and smile

Phil

 

[hurst]

Paris Blues:

…
Therefore, people told me that all my sins were forgiven even the ones that I forgot unintentionally and really want to turn away from them. So trusting that what they said were true (because I didn’t know!), I prayed about it then trusted our Lord and went to Mass on Thanksgiving.

Now you’re saying the opposite of what they said and now it’s making me start to be troubled again. Sensitive person I am no doubt.

They were correct in that since you intended to confess everything, and tried, that even what you forgot was also forgiven.

But what they did not say clearly, I pointed out: that for the forgotten mortal sins to stay forgiven, you must confess them at the earliest opportunity after you later remember them, to make good your intention to confess all your mortal sins. It is a requirement. But this doesn’t mean you suddenly lose forgiveness for the few days until you do confess. You would lose forgiveness as soon as you decide to hide them and hold sins against others:

Matt 18:32 Then his lord called him; and said to him: Thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all the debt, because thou besoughtest me: 33 Shouldst not thou then have had compassion also on thy fellow servant, even as I had compassion on thee? 34 And his lord being angry, delivered him to the torturers until he paid all the debt. 35 So also shall my heavenly Father do to you, if you forgive not every one his brother from your hearts.
Paris Blues:

Did I just commit a sacrilege because I didn’t know and from trusting in our Lord?

No. Sacrilege involves knowledge, and is opposed to trust. You acting out of trust is commendable, and is precisely what will help you overcome scrupulosity. But you must also do your part as you are able, to gain trust in your own ability to comply with God.
Thus, simply confess what you forgot in your next confession, being grateful for Jesus picking up the slack for you

hurst

 

[hurst]

javelin:

Paris Blues:

Then if I know I’m given complete absolution, then why the heck do some people here keep telling me to “oh, go back and tell the priest the sins you forgot to confess”?

Telling them after the fact is not for forgiveness, but to obtain spiritual guidance from the confessor and to ask God’s strength to help you avoid the sin in the future.

If it is a mortal sin that was forgotten, it must be confessed after it is remembered. And it is not only for spiritual guidance.

Q. Is our Confession worthy if, without our fault, we forget to confess a mortal sin?

A. If without our fault we forget to confess a mortal sin, our Confession is worthy, and the sin is forgiven; but it must be told in Confession if it again comes to our mind.

Q. May a person who has forgotten to tell a mortal sin in confession go to Holy Communion before going again to confession?

A. A person who has forgotten to tell a mortal sin in confession may go to communion before again going to confession, because the forgotten sin was forgiven with those confessed, and the confession was good and worthy.

Baltimore Catechism
ourladyswarriors.org/faith/bc3-19.htm

Further information on the effect of confession on forgotten mortal sins are here:
newadvent.org/summa/501005.htm

In sacramental confession, not only is absolution required, but also the judgment of the priest who imposes satisfaction is awaited. Wherefore although the latter has given absolution, nevertheless the penitent is bound to confess in order to supply what was wanting to the sacramental confession.

Conclusion: we must confess forgotten mortal sins if we later remember them.

hurst