I'm having an abortion...

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I know a woman that was expecting for the first time; twin boys. Because of complications she was having, the doctor wanted to abort the smaller baby. She refused saying she wanted both her babies. She gave birth to two healthy baby boys and eventually gave birth to 4 other children.

7 years ago, the smaller twin, the one the doctor wanted to abort, was ordained to the priesthood!
 
Behold me, my beloved Jesus,
weighed down under the burden of my trials and sufferings,
I cast myself at Your feet,
that You may renew my strength and my courage,
while I rest here in Your Presence.
Permit me to lay down my cross in Your Sacred Heart,
for only Your infinite goodness can sustain me;
only Your love can help me bear my cross;
only Your powerful hand can lighten its weight.
O Divine King, Jesus,
whose heart is so compassionate to the afflicted,
I wish to live in You;
suffer and die in You.
During my life be to me my model and my support;
At the hour of my death,
be my hope and my refuge.

Amen.

Please, please reconsider. I will be praying for you, for strength and courage during this very difficult time. I will pray for your baby.

There Goes My Life - by Kenny Chesney

All he could think about was I’m too young for this.
Got my whole life ahead.
Hell I’m just a kid myself.
How’m I gonna raise one.

All he could see were his dreams goin’ up in smoke.
So much for ditchin’ this town and hangin’ out on the coast.
Oh well, those plans are long gone.

And he said,
There goes my life.
There goes my future, my everything.
Might as well kiss it all good-bye.
There goes my life…

A couple years of up all night and a few thousand diapers later.
That mistake he thought he made covers up the refrigerator.
Oh yeah…he loves that little girl.

Momma’s waiting to tuck her in,
As she fumbles up those stairs.
She smiles back at him dragging that teddy bear.
Sleep tight, blue eyes and bouncin’ curls.

He smiles…
There goes my life.
There goes my future, my everything.
I love you, daddy good-night.
There goes my life.

She had that Honda loaded down.
With Abercrombie clothes and 15 pairs of shoes and his American Express.
He checked the oil and slammed the hood, said you’re good to go.
She hugged them both and headed off to the West Coast.

And he cried,
There goes my life.
There goes my future, my everything.
I love you.
Baby good-bye.

There goes my life.
There goes my life.
Baby good-bye.
 
PatsWife922 said:
There are several reasons:
  1. We are just not ready yet.
  2. I have an eating disorder - I am not in the emotional, mental, and physical health to have a baby right now
  3. I am currently on ST disability from my employer because I am getting treatment for my eating disorder - and I can only take so much time in a 12 month period.
  4. We are in a pile of debt - and financially it would be impossible.
  5. I would be due early April - and with my work schedule - that is the worst time possible. My husband and I always talked about him finding a new job when we decided to have kids - as we need something more flexible and he is just not ready to leave his job yet.
Numbers 2-4 are our main reasons. This is a very scary situation for me - my husband is scared to death about how this is all going to effect me and my trying to recover.

This is why we cannot go through with this. It is just not possible.
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Yes, it is possible, and you should go through with this pregnancy. You are more than capable. The problems you listed could have been listed by anyone.

You got married I assume by a priest and you vowed to have children. Well, here he is. He’s a blessing. He could be your only child. Think about that.

I don’t know what kind of eating disorder you have but maybe thinking that you must now eat correctly so your baby will survive will help you too.

Your husband will have to move his date of finding a better job up. Most men will take on an extra job. Mine worked one during the week, another on weekends and went to college nights carrying 16 hours. And I worked too. It isn’t easy but we did it with two babies.

None of us are really in charge of our lives. Life happens when you aren’t ready or think you aren’t ready. You just do it.

Please go for counseling. Call the numbers you’ve been given and get help.
 
Please don’t.

You will regret this decsion for the rest of your life.
 
Only God gives life. We have no right to kill that which He created in His image.

On a personal note, my wife and I have been trying for a baby for over 5 years. 3 miscarriages later and we still try. You have no idea how precious is the gift inside you.

If you do go through with this, may God have mercy on your soul.
 
PatsWife922 said:
There are several reasons:
  1. We are just not ready yet.
  2. I have an eating disorder - I am not in the emotional, mental, and physical health to have a baby right now
  3. I am currently on ST disability from my employer because I am getting treatment for my eating disorder - and I can only take so much time in a 12 month period.
  4. We are in a pile of debt - and financially it would be impossible.
  5. I would be due early April - and with my work schedule - that is the worst time possible. My husband and I always talked about him finding a new job when we decided to have kids - as we need something more flexible and he is just not ready to leave his job yet.
Numbers 2-4 are our main reasons. This is a very scary situation for me - my husband is scared to death about how this is all going to effect me and my trying to recover.

This is why we cannot go through with this. It is just not possible.
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  1. Put the baby up for adoption.
  2. You will be under the guidance of healthcare professionals during your pregnancy. Find a pregnancy crisis center - you can find ways to have all of the OB visits covered - ESPECIALLY if you are putting the child up for adoption.
  3. Having a baby doesn’t require ST disability payments. You are allowed, BY LAW, to take off up to 12 weeks to recover after the birth of your child.
  4. You would be compensated if you decide to give the child up for adoption.
  5. You are weighing the death of a human being against a job. This child may be a dream come true for an infertile couple in your area (or anywhere in the country). Find an adoption center.
It IS possible. The reasons you listed do NOT justify killing a human being. You do realize that this is already a human being growing inside you, don’t you? The baby’s DNA is unique - you can never “recreate” a new baby exactly like this one. You will look at ALL of your future children and wonder what this baby was going to look like. You will be haunted every day for the rest of your life - wondering what this child would be doing in life, wondering what wonderful things she’ll discover and what wonderful adventures she will experience. If you decide to give this baby up for adoption then this child will never be denied those wonderful gifts.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with you. Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now, and at the hour of our death. Amen.
 
Please, please don’t go through with this. The reasons you list now seem to make a pregnancy appear too difficult right now, but they really are blinding you to this precious gift you now have inside of you. You are a mommy, someone’s mommy. . .please don’t let this happen. You may not feel it now, but you will have this instinct kick it where all you want to do is protect your baby. Please go to a Catholic Church near you and see what help they have for you. You don’t have to do this; it’s really not your choice to make. Please reconsider, and I’m praying for you,too.
 
Planning to commit a mortal sin for which you believe you will just get forgiveness later is known as “presumption” - your chance at having adequate contrition is severely lessened, and therefore your chance of actually obtaining forgiveness is much less.
I recommend you give up the baby for adoption. You won’t have to keep it, you may not have to see it, and parents who want a baby will benefit. I am amazed that people really think this is not an option.
 
I read your other posts in which you stated that you do go to confession often. Please try to go and talk with your priest about this. And please go to the priests for life website. A baby is an incredible blessing, one that none of us are worthy to receive. If you truly feel that you could not raise a child, there are many that would be willing to stand up and take your place if you give them the chance.

May Our Lady of Guadalupe pray for you!
 
PatsWife922 said:
There are several reasons:
  1. We are just not ready yet.
  2. I have an eating disorder - I am not in the emotional, mental, and physical health to have a baby right now
  3. I am currently on ST disability from my employer because I am getting treatment for my eating disorder - and I can only take so much time in a 12 month period.
  4. We are in a pile of debt - and financially it would be impossible.
  5. I would be due early April - and with my work schedule - that is the worst time possible. My husband and I always talked about him finding a new job when we decided to have kids - as we need something more flexible and he is just not ready to leave his job yet.
Numbers 2-4 are our main reasons. This is a very scary situation for me - my husband is scared to death about how this is all going to effect me and my trying to recover.

This is why we cannot go through with this. It is just not possible.
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Hello Pats wife,
Please listen to these dear people who have asked you not to abort (take to die) your son or daughter. Please, these difficulties which you have written about are only “time limited” indeed your eating disorder with careful management during pregnancy will result in much improvement of this. Everything you have enumerated can be overcome with help of others like pregnancy centres. Please contact them. You are reacting in a panic situation and in this kind of situation it is difficult to see past the difficulties but the difficulties will have passed in one year, 5 years, 10 years etc, but the death of your son or daughter remains and the fact that you had a hand in this will lead to life long pain of an unimagined kind. Take it from someone who has been there over 40 years ago and has wept over this decision every day since. I think of the son and daughter I could have had, the grand children by them I could have had. The gnerations which will never be born. The gifts I returned to God unopened because at the time I felt that there was no other “choice”
I took what I thought was the easy way out and it turned out to be a horror way out.
Another poster has said that God will forgive you but can you forgive yourself? I can tell you from experience, the memory remains…always. I have many achievements (degrees etc) but I would have traded them in if I could have had my children back. And yes I do have other children and as I look at their lives and achievments and their love for me, it pains me further.
GraceAngel.
Please, please dont take your beautiful little baby to be cruelly killed, you will overcome all the difficulties and God WILL give you many graces and ways to manage.
 
At 20 weeks babies can feel pain. Therefore it is incredibly painful when the foreceps are inserted and their head and spine crushed and then their limbs dismembered.
 
Thanks to everyone’s responses…

Yes - this is a serious post. I am truly sorry.

You are right to say that I am looking for help - looking for someone to talk me out of it and give me a viable option. I do not want to give this baby for adoption - I could not handle that kind of embarassment or shame.

It is a terrible situation - one in which we hoped we would never face. We do not want to do this - it is killing us - but feel it is the best thing to do.

I just want this to be over…
 
PatsWife922 said:
Thanks to everyone’s responses…

Yes - this is a serious post. I am truly sorry.

You are right to say that I am looking for help - looking for someone to talk me out of it and give me a viable option. I do not want to give this baby for adoption - I could not handle that kind of embarassment or shame.

It is a terrible situation - one in which we hoped we would never face. We do not want to do this - it is killing us - but feel it is the best thing to do.

I just want this to be over…
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You can’t handle the embarassment of giving a child to a loving family, but you can kill it!!
I’m sorry, I need to walk away now for I have nothing left to say that won’t get my kicked off this site!
 
Talk to your dr. about possibilities to help with feelings of embarrassment. Since you are in counseling, I am positive they could counsel you about those feelings as well.
Btw, I had an eating disorder when i was 11, and instead of saying i can’t or it’s not possible, i said i can and recovered. Lots of things are possible with God, and you even have mental health resources. Lucky you!
 
:)HI Sweetie, I am told not to condem or judge but, you should go through with you did not think of before you made love. Or was it like? You see what you two do reflects your love for each other, it is what comes out of your love making. If you do not welcome this life inside you I’ll take it! And may be someone else here would want to have a beautiful child, why dont you ask? your not afraid of having it are you? Now if your situation was differnt you would want it right?. Let me tell you and all here some thing. I felt the same once in my life and didn’t want to be stuck with a child that was forced on me. but i knew it was wrong and I was sooooo pooooor. When this child grew up and found out how he came into this world he cried "Why didn’t you just put me in the gutter and walk away mom?"I was never so hurt, and then he told me MOM i’m glad you did keep me you had a choice and you chose me Thank You MOM. You are the greatest mother there ever could be.We have a bond and we alway’s will. I struggled all alone but Father saw me through and you my dear have someone who cares about you and Father cares also. So I know that you will do the right thing and have this wonderful gift Father bestowed upon you for a very good reason. You are being tried as a daughter of God, you know what to do so go do it! You are Loved Nancy
 
PatsWife922 said:
You are right to say that I am looking for help - looking for someone to talk me out of it and give me a viable option. I do not want to give this baby for adoption - I could not handle that kind of embarassment or shame.

…
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there are viable options. You can PM me and I will give you the name of a crisis pregnancy center. Places exist where you can go, you can stay there and have great care - emotionally, medically and spiritually - until the baby is born. The baby is then placed with a loving family, you return to your life healed and refreshed, knowing you chose life.

The decision is yours.
 
PatsWife922 said:
Thanks to everyone’s responses…

Yes - this is a serious post. I am truly sorry.

You are right to say that I am looking for help - looking for someone to talk me out of it and give me a viable option. I do not want to give this baby for adoption - I could not handle that kind of embarassment or shame.

It is a terrible situation - one in which we hoped we would never face. We do not want to do this - it is killing us - but feel it is the best thing to do.

I just want this to be over…
Click to expand...
PLEASE don’t hurt your baby. 😦
 
PatsWife922 said:
Thanks to everyone’s responses…

Yes - this is a serious post. I am truly sorry.

You are right to say that I am looking for help - looking for someone to talk me out of it and give me a viable option. I do not want to give this baby for adoption - I could not handle that kind of embarassment or shame.

It is a terrible situation - one in which we hoped we would never face. We do not want to do this - it is killing us - but feel it is the best thing to do.

I just want this to be over…
Click to expand...
It is not the best thing to do. Refer to my earlier post. I can tell you know it is never ever going to be over. It’s not over for me, and it’s been 15 years. The pain is as fresh as it was when I first realized what I had done.

Adoption is not embarassment or shame, it is the one of the bravest and most self-sacrificial things to do–to provide for the best life for your child. I’ve been where you are at, scared and feeling desperate. But there is a way out, there are so many resources available for those in a crisis situation. The way out is not abortion, because that will only lead to a whole new group of problems that cannot really be solved. You can solve a financial problem by making use of resources, saving money, etc. But how do you solve the problem of realizing you murdered a child, your child? You don’t. It doesn’t go away, never goes away. It never ends. I can promise you that it will destroy your psyche, it will crush you, it will likely destroy the relationship between you and your husband, at least changing it forever, and not for the better. It happened to me, I’ve seen it happen to others. I can promise you that if you let your baby live, you will never regret it.

It seems like the easy way, but that is a lie. Listen to what the others have said. You ARE stronger than you think. You CAN do this. Most of all, you are loved. You have an eating disorder, and it sounds to me, that in part you are afraid of how a pregnancy will alter your body. But you can be a mommy, you can conquer this. Stick to your treatment plan, pray hard, go to confession, talk to your priest. He can help you. Try to get your husband on Catholic Answers Forum. Please, let your baby live.

Please feel free to pm me. KNow that we are all praying so hard for you, your husband, and your baby.
 
**DO NOT DO THIS!! YOU WILL REGRET THIS FOREVER LIKE I DO!! **I am not some random person who never been through it. You will always wonder if you were having a boy or a girl, if the baby could have enriched your life, you will think about birthdays and Christmas. Go to abortionno.org. That is what abortion truly is. It showed me that I was wrong. Once you make that decision, you can never take it back! This does not solve anything. I understand the shame that can go with giving up your baby for adoption. You think I can’t give away a piece of myself. I will be judged. Find a way to keep your baby. Anyhow giving it away is better that KILLING it! :crying: Also, you never know if you will be fertile again. I have PCOS and at the time, I did not realize the seriousness of my condition. Now I am married and realized the miracle that God gave me, I threw it away. Don’t throw away your miracle.:nope: Message me privately and I will tell you more about the experience. Angels were giving me clues that day not to do it. But I ignored it. Don’t ignore your conscious.
 
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