I'm leaving my parish..

[QUESTIONINGMOM]

After over 20 years I am sad to say that I am searching for a new parish. IMO my parish has been taken over by a sanctimonious, officious, advocate of excessive religiosity, throwback to pre vatican 2, lunatic. No question really, just wanted to vent.

 

[fix]

Was the Church in error prior to VII?

 

[Ham1]

After over 20 years I am sad to say that I am searching for a new parish. IMO my parish has been taken over by a sanctimonious, officious, advocate of excessive religiosity, throwback to pre vatican 2, lunatic. No question really, just wanted to vent.

Sorry to hear that. What sort of things are being done? Also, have you asked for a meeting with your pastor to discuss these changes? Perhaps in private his demeanor would be different and you could both come to a better understanding of each other.

 

[QUESTIONINGMOM]

Fix - I’m not a theologian so I won’t debate you. Thanks for the post though.

 

[fix]

Well, could you give an example of something that has been changed you find unreasonable?

 

[mary_bobo]

After over 20 years I am sad to say that I am searching for a new parish. IMO my parish has been taken over by a sanctimonious, officious, advocate of excessive religiosity, throwback to pre vatican 2, lunatic. No question really, just wanted to vent.

Sorry you feel this way, but perhaps these same feelings could have been expressed more charitably.

 

[cheese_sdc]

After over 20 years I am sad to say that I am searching for a new parish. IMO my parish has been taken over by a sanctimonious, officious, advocate of excessive religiosity, throwback to pre vatican 2, lunatic. No question really, just wanted to vent.

Yeah, I know the kind you’re talking about. They don’t want people to exchange the sign of peace. They spend more money on chalices than the poor. They sit in presider’s chairs that are more throne than chair. They enforce, with a near fanatical devotion, certain parts of the GIRM while turning a blind eye to other parts, all the while declaring their undying loyality to the magisterium.

I know your frustration.

 

[MichiganTrumbul]

After over 20 years I am sad to say that I am searching for a new parish. IMO my parish has been taken over by a sanctimonious, officious, advocate of excessive religiosity, throwback to pre vatican 2, lunatic. No question really, just wanted to vent.

I would really like to understand your meaning, but your posting, unfortunately, does not give me anything to work with.

Perhaps if you were to give us some examples of things you liked about your parish before you considered leaving it, and of things you do not like about it now, we could give you more informative replies.

MT

 

[Damascus]

Sometimes we need to vent. If this will help this poster get some of the bad feelings out - let it be, above all do no further harm
(got that one from tequilla mac yesterday reading a post made)

I will pray for this poster. Be nice to the hurting one. Or risk alienating them further!

 

[Caesar]

After over 20 years I am sad to say that I am searching for a new parish. IMO my parish has been taken over by a sanctimonious, officious, advocate of excessive religiosity, throwback to pre vatican 2, lunatic. No question really, just wanted to vent.

Sounds like a good parish to me. Why dont you like it

 

[QUESTIONINGMOM]

I’m sorry my post was too brief to make my concerns clear.
Mary Bobo - yes, you are right. I should have written that I do not doubt the sincerity of my pastor’s calling to the priesthood, prayer-life, sense of the mystical, self discipline and work ethic. I also share a love of the ritual of the Mass with my parish leader and object of my complaint. In fact when I first attended a Mass during which he was the celebrant I was happy to feel a sense of kinship with him in this regard.
Fix and Michigan Over the course of time his dark and seemingly joyless view of the state of humanity and US culture depresses me. His conviciton in the power of prayer not just before action but in place of action riles my sense of how a thoughtful person should come to decisions. His stress of obedience above all else makes me uncomfortable. The disappearance of young girls from among our altar servers bums me out. My teenage daughter is anxious to leave and I can’t argue with her. Mantilla wearing woman have started to attending our church. Yes, what one wears to Mass is ones own choice, but I am just using this to set a mental image for you of our Mass…
Cheese Yes, you have an idea of what makes me want to change parishes except there have been no financial problems or choices that are a huge issue. Yes we do spend too much money on stuff that I would cut out (but in no way a significant dollar figure) and I would not leave for minor stuff.

 

[tom.wineman]

Do you really remember pre- Vatican 2 ?

---

Sounds like a guy they use to call St. Paul.
He was always writing letters telling people
what to do.

 

[Caesar]

Over the course of time his dark and seemingly joyless view of the state of humanity and US culture depresses me. His conviciton in the power of prayer not just before action but in place of action riles my sense of how a thoughtful person should come to decisions. His stress of obedience above all else makes me uncomfortable. The disappearance of young girls from among our altar servers bums me out. My teenage daughter is anxious to leave and I can’t argue with her. Mantilla wearing woman have started to attending our church. Yes, what one wears to Mass is ones own choice, but I am just using this to set a mental image for you of our Mass…

1. The state of humanity is in dire straits. American (well, western) culture is hedonistic, relativistic and modernistic.
2. Prayer is the the most powerful action one can do.
3. There should not be altar girls. The service of the altar is a path to a vocation as a priest, or at least an important part of the discernment process. It should be reserved for boys so they may experience service in the Liturgy and see if they may one day be priest.
4. Many Catholic women are starting to wear mantillas now. It is not wrong- quite the opposite in fact.

Sounds like your priest is trying to bring back Catholicism to your Catholic parish

 

[Damascus]

Do you know why threads like this are dangerous? Because we have a person here that is having to go through a major change all at once.

Funny, the conservatives (yes, I like the TLM, in fact - I prefer it!)

mess up with this one IMHO. They say VATII brought to many changes to quickly and this is the problem …

Guess what guys, this poster has the same problem in reverse!

I understand because I think radical change causes confusion. But that argument works both ways in this case.

I love the bells and whistles and the reverence more and more everyday.

But, for someone who has been to a different enviornment and is struggling to keep her daughter at a tender age in Church where she belongs (thank you for instilling this in her BTW!) does not need a lecture about this.

She needs understanding.

 

[cheese_sdc]

1. The state of humanity is in dire straits. American (well, western) culture is hedonistic, relativistic and modernistic.
2. Prayer is the the most powerful action one can do.
3. There should not be altar girls. The service of the altar is a path to a vocation as a priest, or at least an important part of the discernment process. It should be reserved for boys so they may experience service in the Liturgy and see if they may one day be priest.
4. Many Catholic women are starting to wear mantillas now. It is not wrong- quite the opposite in fact.

Sounds like your priest is trying to bring back Catholicism to your Catholic parish

Catholicism as you understand it. There are other, equally valid, licit and acceptable ways to practice catholicism that involve altar girls, uncovered female heads, and social justice.

Please do not be insisting that your understanding of catholicism is the only “true” version of catholicism.

 

[paulah]

Hey Mom,

Know the saying: God makes lemonade out of lemons?

Hang in there, GF. Change is good - most of the time .
Try to think of GOOD things that will happen from this change, k?

 

[Texas_Roofer]

After over 20 years I am sad to say that I am searching for a new parish. IMO my parish has been taken over by a sanctimonious, officious, advocate of excessive religiosity, throwback to pre vatican 2, lunatic. No question really, just wanted to vent.

Hope you feel better

Something I am having a problem with at our parish is the volunteer group getting too involved and thus the burn out issue. It is human to place the religion on the pedestal and to become frustrated with the local administrators of the parish over this. Please consider just backing up to a Laity position - Or said another way Worship God but to not administrate - I find it is much more appropriate for some. - good luck

 

[netmilsmom]

I’m sorry my post was too brief to make my concerns clear.
Fix and Michigan Over the course of time his dark and seemingly joyless view of the state of humanity and US culture depresses me. His conviciton in the power of prayer not just before action but in place of action riles my sense of how a thoughtful person should come to decisions. His stress of obedience above all else makes me uncomfortable. The disappearance of young girls from among our altar servers bums me out. My teenage daughter is anxious to leave and I can’t argue with her. Mantilla wearing woman have started to attending our church. Yes, what one wears to Mass is ones own choice, but I am just using this to set a mental image for you of our Mass… .

My heart goes out to you, truly.
Charismatics totally changed my parish. It was heart breaking. I found a parish that sounds like the one you are leaving that I love. Different strokes for different folks.

I think you are doing the right thing. Styles of a parish are abound out there. And I think SHOULD be available.

But please do share what parish you are at. Many here are searching for a more Historically Catholic parish and would appreciate knowing where one is.

The Peace of Our Lord be with you and may you find somewhere to be filled.

 

[Caesar]

Catholicism as you understand it. There are other, equally valid, licit and acceptable ways to practice catholicism that involve altar girls, uncovered female heads, and social justice.

Please do not be insisting that your understanding of catholicism is the only “true” version of catholicism.

Oh yes, lets believe whatever we want. If we dont like a teaching of the Church, lets shrug it off. There are many levels of being Catholic, but they are all good. Right?

Wrong. Altar girls should only be used in circumstances where altar boys are not available. The service of the altar is meant to introduce young male Catholics to the priesthood and the administration of the sarcraments. As we all know, women cannot be priests, so there is no real need for altar girls.

As for the mantilla, it is a way for women to show reverance at Mass. A fine practice.

Oh, and you may notice that I said nothing against social justice.

 

[Damascus]

May I suggest something here,

I only ask that the OP consider that she is allowed to go to another parish but there are stipulations on that and I’m sure someone here can give you the details on that. Funny- I was given all this info very recently here but I cant remember the thread on it.

Anyway- you might be better off to stay. Why? well, your opinion matters.
You have been there a long time. Talk to your friends at the parish and see if they are feeling the same way. Maybe if the Pastor can talk to several of the faithful at once, he might take more time considering your concerns, and you need to give him a shot if it means this much to you.

Its easy to feel territorial when you have been there as long as you have.
But, this works to your advantage here. You are a person who needs to be cared for just as much as anyone else there. Try it. If you dont you will always wonder if you did not do your best to work with this new Pastor in fairness and charity.

Anyway good luck, and God Bless you for caring enough to be upset.

Some people would just stop going to Mass and lapse. You sound like you dont want to do that. So dont! The Holy Spirit is working in you to fight for your faith.