I'm new and a bit confused about where to start

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bigremo

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Hello, I’m new, greetings to everyone. Never did a forum thing before, but I have a problem and I am unsure where I can voice it. I don’t want to offend anyone, but how can resolve the problem without talking about it? I’ve prayed for guidance, but this goes beyond me.

I work for a Catholic children’s charity in Ohio (we have the word Saint in our title). Our CEO is a homosexual and she has just hired her girlfriend to work here. Her girlfriend has no formal training in the job, so we have some nepotism going on. I recently discovered that our CEO is also paying her girlfriend a substantial amount more than previous people who sat in the same chair, so that seems unfair. I’m trying to ignore the homosexuality, but the nepotism just amplifies my discomfort. I have worked here for several years doing a similar job as her girlfriend and I make about $10k less per year. I love working with the kids and I work for a Catholic organization to specifically avoid the issue of homosexuality. I learned some tolerance, but I just don’t want a homosexual in charge of this Catholic organization. Adding her girlfriend seems especially disrespectful to my religion. What can I do? Thank you for any advice.
 
You should write an anonymous letter to your CEO, asking her to stop living and promoting an openly gay lifestyle and act responsibly. Make sure you remind her where she works and what she is CEO of. Use big bold letters, maybe she forgot. Also ask her to pass along a pink slip to her girlfriend as well.

Depending on the outcome of trying to do things privately, you should probably contact the Catholic League. They will take things from there.

catholicleague.org/

The Catholic League is pretty good with addressing situations like this, but if that fails you could write into some Catholic newspapers and see if you can get word out and have people write letters and what not asking for the appropriate steps to be taken.

This is what I would do, so make of it what you will.

You might also try writing your Bishop, but he might not to jump into a mess like this so…
 
I don’t see how her being gay is an issue at all.

But I do see that she is given someone close to her special treatment and that’s wrong.
 
Teen4Christ said:
I don’t see how her being gay is an issue at all.
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Like I said, I’m not trying to offend anyone, but her homosexuality is a problem for me. Years and years of being surrounded by nothing but bigotry will do that to you. I do understand it is my problem and I recognize it enough to keep it in perspective, most times. I was raised to believe homosexuality was wrong. I’m not militant, but I can’t shake off twenty years of my life. Anyways, the CEO and her girlfriend sometimes kiss at work, just a peck here and there when no one is looking. I think it’s terribly unprofessional, but the homosexual aspect of it makes it worse (for me anyway). And we have young children here and I would rather the children didn’t see anyone kiss at all while they are here. This is supposed to be a Catholic place of healing for these kids and I feel this undermines the whole point. Like I said, I’m just here looking for perspective, not judgement.
 
bigremo said:
Like I said, I’m not trying to offend anyone, but her homosexuality is a problem for me. Years and years of being surrounded by nothing but bigotry will do that to you. I do understand it is my problem and I recognize it enough to keep it in perspective, most times. I was raised to believe homosexuality was wrong. I’m not militant, but I can’t shake off twenty years of my life. Anyways, the CEO and her girlfriend sometimes kiss at work, just a peck here and there when no one is looking. I think it’s terribly unprofessional, but the homosexual aspect of it makes it worse (for me anyway). And we have young children here and I would rather the children didn’t see anyone kiss at all while they are here. This is supposed to be a Catholic place of healing for these kids and I feel this undermines the whole point. Like I said, I’m just here looking for perspective, not judgement.
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Man, no need to feel ashamed or bullied for being christian.
 
I should mention that our CEO is very petty and vindictive. If she got wind that I was even discussing this issue, I would be fired in a heartbeat. It’s a scary world out there.

You know, I joined a Catholic organization in the hopes that I would be surrounded by Catholics. I really don’t care what homosexuals do as long as they don’t do it in the name of my God and Church!

I don’t want her punished, I just want her to go. She and her girlfriend can go be lesbians at a Non-Catholic Children’s Organization. If I start writing letters to the Catholic League or the Bishop, what can I say? Hi, I’m not a bigot but I’m going to sound like one and please don’t tell anyone my name… And if they ever mentioned my name and letter to my CEO, I think she would sue me until my feet turned blue. Something should be done, but how can I anonymously put a bug in someone’s ear about this? If you are going to work for a specifically Catholic organization, I think you should have to follow the guidelines of the Catholic Faith. Am I wrong here? These days I feel like I have to hide my faith.
 
Spire said:
You should write an anonymous letter to your CEO, asking her to stop living and promoting an openly gay lifestyle and act responsibly. Make sure you remind her where she works and what she is CEO of. Use big bold letters, maybe she forgot. Also ask her to pass along a pink slip to her girlfriend as well.
…
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no you should right a letter over your signature to the bishop or superior of religious order who oversees this organization. anonymous letters are never of any value in a situation like this. you also need to know your own legal rights w/regard to your job. do not include allegations, personal gripes or gossip in your letter, stick to facts. keep homosexuality out of it and concentrate on the issues of administration that are clearly not within diocesan financial guidelines.
 
bigremo said:
I should mention that our CEO is very petty and vindictive. If she got wind that I was even discussing this issue, I would be fired in a heartbeat. It’s a scary world out there.

You know, I joined a Catholic organization in the hopes that I would be surrounded by Catholics. I really don’t care what homosexuals do as long as they don’t do it in the name of my God and Church!

I don’t want her punished, I just want her to go. She and her girlfriend can go be lesbians at a Non-Catholic Children’s Organization. If I start writing letters to the Catholic League or the Bishop, what can I say? Hi, I’m not a bigot but I’m going to sound like one and please don’t tell anyone my name… And if they ever mentioned my name and letter to my CEO, I think she would sue me until my feet turned blue. Something should be done, but how can I anonymously put a bug in someone’s ear about this? If you are going to work for a specifically Catholic organization, I think you should have to follow the guidelines of the Catholic Faith. Am I wrong here? These days I feel like I have to hide my faith.
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It doesn’t sound like she’s very Catholic to me…homosexuality is strictly agents the teachings of the church. You should defiantly take this matter to a higher authority, the bishop or the administrative offices in your diocese, like puzzleannie said. You not only need to do this not only because it is the right thing to do, but also because you are working with children and you need to protect them. Homosexuality is a delicate situation, and many people can misunderstand your intentions to help them, but you have to risk hurting their feelings to try to help them reach Eternity.

You are completely right about following the guidelines of our Faith. Go for it. Jesus with reward you in Heaven and save you from any real harm here. And don’t EVER hide your faith! Be stong! Be proud! Be a witness! 👍
 
bigremo said:
Hello, I’m new, greetings to everyone. Never did a forum thing before, but I have a problem and I am unsure where I can voice it. I don’t want to offend anyone, but how can resolve the problem without talking about it? I’ve prayed for guidance, but this goes beyond me.

I work for a Catholic children’s charity in Ohio (we have the word Saint in our title). Our CEO is a homosexual and she has just hired her girlfriend to work here. Her girlfriend has no formal training in the job, so we have some nepotism going on. I recently discovered that our CEO is also paying her girlfriend a substantial amount more than previous people who sat in the same chair, so that seems unfair. I’m trying to ignore the homosexuality, but the nepotism just amplifies my discomfort. I have worked here for several years doing a similar job as her girlfriend and I make about $10k less per year. I love working with the kids and I work for a Catholic organization to specifically avoid the issue of homosexuality. I learned some tolerance, but I just don’t want a homosexual in charge of this Catholic organization. Adding her girlfriend seems especially disrespectful to my religion. What can I do? Thank you for any advice.
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Dear friend in Christ,

** 1. Be sure of your facts**
  1. Be sure you can provide evidence of your facts
  2. Prepare a letter to 1. The head of your organization
    Code: 
                            2.  With a "cc" to your Bishop (although if
he is in Cincinnatti I’m not sure … (from personal experiece) what help you can expect?

** I would only do this if you have verifible evedence that this
person is factually incompentent, is factually openly living or
advocating the homosexual lifestyle, and or is factually causing
desention among the employees, and or their is factually a high
probability of causing a scandal that would effect the RCC.**

EXTREME care is to be taken not to yourself cause scandal, nor to damage the good name of another.

You may wish to seek advise from your Confessor first?

May God bless and guide you.
 
Her being gay is not an issue, it dosen’t harm you at all. I don’t see how people can think it is an issue.
:mad:

The problem here is she’s not being professional
 
puzzleannie said:
no you should right a letter over your signature to the bishop or superior of religious order who oversees this organization. anonymous letters are never of any value in a situation like this. you also need to know your own legal rights w/regard to your job. do not include allegations, personal gripes or gossip in your letter, stick to facts. keep homosexuality out of it and concentrate on the issues of administration that are clearly not within diocesan financial guidelines.
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You think the Bishop will want to get involved(bring the hammer down)? Why keep homosexuality out of it?
 
Teen4Christ: Her being a homosexual has MUCH to do with the problem. My Church is against the sin of homosexual behavior. I am unsure what Christian’s think about homosexuality, but as a Catholic, I know the answer. Homosexual behavior is a sin and I don’t remember reading any biblical exceptions for homosexual behavior if you are quiet about it. Saint Vincent’s is a Catholic Children’s organization! I joined to help children and be surrounded by people who believe in the teachings of my Heavenly Father, to be aligned with my Diocese, to listen to the words and thoughts of my God. I did not join a Catholic organization to go against my Church or to learn tolerance for sinful acts! By your words, the homosexual is in the right and I should be quiet about my faith so I don’t offend her. I have to respectfully disagree with you. I have nothing against her; I just want her to go somewhere else. She can go to a non-Catholic organization and be all the lesbian she wants to be. I love my God, my faith, and my Church and that isn’t going to change. The Bible is more than a collection of paper to me; it is a set of rules, not suggestions. I have nothing against homosexuals, but you cannot engage in homosexual behavior and call yourself a true Catholic, you are merely a sinner pretending to be a Catholic. And hiding her sin under the auspices of the Church is out and out sacrilege. The Word doesn’t bend to accommodate the sinner.
 
The problem may become insoluble if this organization is taking and using any federal funding. Obama has just issued an executive order that prohibits Faith based organizations that take federal funding from discriminating against persons of other religions, lifestyles etc. Preferences for the organizations co-religionists when hiring is out. I expect that matters of this sort are going to get more common.
 
bigremo – you really got brave fast just now! You have great
clarity in your faith. Have you thought of the idea
of asking God what to do? You are so strong and
clear in you faith that I think if you ask Him and are
very quiet, there is a good chance He will tell you
what to do. Adoration is good for this. It has been
my experience that to pray there for an hour does
bring an answer. Also, there may be a better place
to work. It is just possible that under these
circumstances, another place that isn’t even Catholic
may be more Catholic than that place you are in.
I found that to be true with the local Catholic school.
I am so happy that you are in the world! If you don’t
give up, I won’t either.
 
I have no fear about my faith, just about where I can voice it without repercussion. For the last six years, I have prayed and it has given me the strength to be tolerant of the situation at work. The addition of the girlfriend to our staff has tested me to the point of breaking and it led me here…a good place. You have all helped so much and I thank you for the advice and the conversation. I am unsure what I will do about this, but writing a letter or even finding a better place to work doesn’t seem as forbidding as it once did.

Blessings to all,
👍
 
Okay, so I spoke to Bishop Campbell himself about this problem and he told me to quietly pray and let the Lord do his work in peace. He was rather dismissive and it just sounded like a cowardly way to avoid the issue and make me go away. So I guess the Bishop of Columbus Ohio condones homosexual behavior since he has decided to leave the lesbian and her girlfriend in charge of our Catholic children. So very disappointing to see a Bishop picking and choosing parts of the Bible to follow and ignoring the rest. I suppose he is a political animal, after all.

My love of the Lord is why I spoke up in the first place, so I am really confused about what to do now. If the Bishop doesn’t care, maybe I just need to go elsewhere, find another religion maybe. I know how bad that sounds and it tears me up inside to even think it, but I am seeking people of real faith who don’t discard the Bible when it is inconvenient. I’m feeling very alone in my faith these days. Can anyone offer me anything hopeful?
 
I’d like to agree with you about one point:

A person who believes that there’s nothing wrong with homosexuality ought to never participate with or be in any way involved with a Catholic organization. Why? The Catholic Church opposes secular adoption rights for gay people (see section 7) and they oppose same-sex secular civil unions (see section 5). Obviously, they believe that homosexual relationships are fundamentally disordered and immoral. Perhaps most importantly, the beliefs the Church advocates have inflicted lasting damage in the lives of gay teens who have the misfortune of growing up in a religious household; their Catholic parents often react to their child’s homosexuality in highly damaging ways, with responses ranging from social isolation to forced “conversion” therapy to complete or partial abandonment as the teen grows older (See Bryan Olsen’s story in Time or “Zach”'s story or this blog from someone who counsels rejected teens). This, of course, is bad (See this study).

A gay person (such as your CEO) ought not to participate in the very organization that actively seeks out the destruction of her relationship.

Like you, I believe that people ought to live out their conscience. If their Church demands that adherents believe everything they teach, then those who dissent - no matter how minor - should leave completely. Otherwise, they’re basically living a lie.
 
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