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LilyM
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What deception? What lie? If he asked her what was in the smoothie and she omitted to mention the Metamucil then you’d have a point. If he said he didn’t want any and she promised never to give him any then again you’d have a point.
Presumably he asked no such question and she made no such promise, so no deception or lie is involved.
Again, what part of ‘true love for a person means you do what is good for them, right for them and helpful for them, it doesn’t mean just pandering to their illogical dictatorial whims’ don’t you understand?
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Ray_Scheel
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Quoting John, but directed to the list:
I think its pretty obvious at this point that John is trolling. He is pretending outrage at a including things in a smoothie that are well known to be in the category of the common smoothiie ingredients, but sidestepped the question that would have ended the thread if he’d answered it, namely whether the “no” of the DH of the OP to taking Metamucil should be extended to ever again offering him any combination of soluble fiber and sugar - even in forms entirely dissimilar to the original form. Instead, he’s using a claimed ignorance of what a smoothie is (ignoring even what other posters have pointed out about them) to pretend there is a significant difference here between getting her DH fiber through fairly normal types of things to include in a smoothie vs fairly normal ingredients in an oatmeal cookies, muffins, etc.
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wifenmommy
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I agree. It is a big stretch to really believe that someone would get a divorce over fiber!!! He evern went so far as to say that adding fiber is worse that being cheated on??? sniff sniff—I think I smell a troll too!
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system
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Uh…the title of the thread should be a clue
This is a simple principal. That fact that people keep dressing it up as “for a good reason” does not change it.
John is arguing for a simple principal - he has given extreme examples to do so. People have attacked his extreme examples but NO ONE has negated the basic principal. You don’t deceive those you claim to love.
The man said NO. The wife sidestepping his wishes for what she believes is a greater good, shows she does not respect him. This is AT BEST demeaning to him.
I understand where you’re coming from. You’re coming from a place where it is OK to disrepect your spouse. And you’ll defend that to the point of this personal attack above.
Dictatorial whims? now who is getting extreme?
Rationalization is still rationalization.
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LilyM
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Wrong on a couple of points here. First - as I said, there was no lie, no deception. Regardless of the thread title. He didn’t ask, she wasn’t obliged to tell, he didn’t ask for a promise, she wasn’t bound to imply a promise when she didn’t make one.
Second - the reason she did it is for what his ***doctor AND he himself ***have acknowledged is his greater good. She’s not deciding on her own whim what’s good for him. He himself acknowledged that it’s a good thing which he nonetheless didn’t want to do. Crucial difference.
Respect and autonomy are earned. Someone who behaves like a five-year-old child loses at least some of their right to respect, and autonomy, spouse or no. If I behave like a five-year-old child so do I. I have so behaved, and believe me sometimes I’ve been glad that I wasn’t listened to when I wasn’t being reasonable.
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system
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Yes we know what YOU SAID. Here are some, besides me, who did not agree
I don’t think this thread will bring about any change in anyone’s opinion, though.
So, PEACE!
I Gotta work!
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Ray_Scheel
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You mean, aside from the parts of this thread he has repeatedly ignored pointing out that adding fiber is one of the things commonly done to smoothies? But since he isn’t answering that perhaps you would - would you still consider it sneaky if she’d made him oatmeal cookies for the intent of supplementing his fiber while not mentioning that as part of her reason when making them when she offered him one without comment on the properties of one of its common ingredients? How about if she made him muffins with whole barley flour without announcing it? Or adding ground flax seed as a partial substitute for oil?
In other words, are you also saying his his “no” should be extended to mean she should not offer him any combination of soluble fiber and sugar in the food she prepared and offered him, even when it was no longer even vaguely similar tot he particular combination in which he did say “no”?
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actorgirl
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wow. Party on,dude
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LilyM
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Yes, and all four of you are more than entitled to disagree
It’s simple, I’m absolutely never going to allow a loved one of mine to run their health into the ground if I can help it in any way.I’m sorry that you or anyone else is offended by such an attitude, but if more people took action like v, then America and Australia wouldn’t be in the ruinous position of being the fattest and second-fattest nations on earth, with the attendant health-care crises, that they are in now.
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system
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Aw shucks - thanks! I wouldn’t want to disagree without your OKYes, and all four of you are more than entitled to disagree
I’m not offended at all. I am, however, much more appreciative of the relationship I have with my wife.
She is, indeed, a global hero
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johntkd
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Ok i said I wasnt going to post but I am being accused of trolling etc which i am not
you state that she did it because ADr and the man agreed it was for the greater good so that in itself makes it ok
same thing goes for the abortion example i gave, A **DR and all the people involved agree **the womans health is in jeopardy so that makes the abortion OK? and lets assume the woman of course says no
so the man slips a crushed up day after pill into her food with what you are saying that would be ok because he didnt promise he wouldnt do it she didnt ask if it was there, and of course its for her own good health.so you think this is ok?
by the way the ingredients in that same pill are in our bodies, and foods so cant be all that harmful as you say.
.
Oatmeal cookies have natural fiber in the oats, she isnt adding an over the counter supplement huge difference
Op says they dont eat right and eat lots of protiens, so the healthy food thing is a dead horse dont you think, she is just as guilty of the “bad foods” as he is,anyways to answer the question
about the extension of the word no if she is adding “supplements” without his knowledge she should not be offering them to him on a basis they have not been “tampered with” if she comes out and says I have added fiber, vitamins etc to this recipe then she is within the trust limits he is aware they have been tampered with.
also she knows how he felt about the “implications” of the product she used, they have other fiber supplements that are not only much higher in fiber,have no taste, and are cheaper, yet she chose the one he was directly against why? control?
as far as it being “normal” to get enhanced smoothies, maybe thats why he prefers to have them made at home so he knows what is in them, only this time he really didnt know did he.
Now I am going to add something to this thread and only because everyone thinks i am so nutso right now,I hate deception and trickery obviously,
I good friend of mine took this same supplement at the beginning of the year, and it put her in the hospital, now before you go attackig me on this I will say it prolly ended up saving her life,
seems she has been a diabetic for years, this particular supplement blew her suger into the upper 300s
thats how they found out she was a diabetic, BUT it almost killed her in the process,she is still very much fighting for her life has one kidney shut down, and other barely working,
one of the main reasons she is still alive today is she knew what she had changed in her diet,which gave them a direct path to what may have been the problem. now lets imagine in this case this man going to another city on a buisness trip and colapsing
due to same issue the time it would have taken to diagnose could have cost him his life, people dont stop to consider how many others have very bad effects from over the counter supplements and vitamins, thousands die every year from them, thats why they are trying to get stricter laws on them, everyone assumes oh its over the counter so its safe.some of the added ingredients are where the problem exists, in this case the sugars in it are very hard for a body to dispose of .
seeing how many deceitful people there are jumping in saddens me, I have had meals myself that were fiber enhanced with the fiber that comes in the big green bottles But I was told by the person whom made the meal it was there.
(spahgetti) even put it in my coffee, but again was told before hand.the coffee it changed the taste of just a sidgeon and I do mean slightly couldnt tell in the meal at all. But the key was she was honest and upfront from the get go
I am finding out this seems to be a extremely rare thing for a practicing Catholic girl.for some reasons they seem to be able to rationalize if its for health resosns its ok
well its not ok I am also very sure if you asked a priest about it you would get the same from him as from me Its wrong to deceive…
thanks for reading my posts though and I can assure you i am not trolling for an arguement, My only agenda in this thread is to see honesty ad respect for a person, there isnt enough of it in this world today,
John
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Teakafrog
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[SIGN]Don’t Feed the Trolls[/SIGN]
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Ray_Scheel
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See, that’s the thing, I don’t see the difference between adding ground Psyllium husks vs say, whole oat flour or ground flaxseed. Ditto for subbing whole barley flour for wheat in another recipe, or adding wheat bran to something else.
So, discounting the sugar content of Metamucil (since it can be counted as a legitimate addition to a smoothie for palatability), what does have a higher fiber soluble content than Psyllium husks (which are also close to tasteless)?
If she’d gotten the Psyllium husks from a health food store instead of using what she had labeled with the Metamucil brand name (but used in a manner totally different than the package instructions for consumption), would that have been enough difference for you, even though it was ultimately the SAME THING?
I would agree that buying the straight hulls would be cheaper over the long term (and they are available in health food store with adding to smoothies being one of the recommended consumption routes), but as far as a sample size to see if it would work, using unflavored Metamucil for the tests isn’t a bad option. this would be much like I used some overpriced “stump remover” to test how it worked before picking up a 50# bag of potassium nitrate when clearing my property - same stuff in bulk with the fillers removed, but I wouldn’t want to have that much around if I’d decided it wasn’t going to work for my needs.
You are still not paying attention to what a smoothie has been from its start. Smoothies are an offshoot of the health food industry, their original claim to popularity was as a “cover” for supplements that had palatability issues. If there was not something healthy and non-dessert-ish in a smoothie that would be change in preparation that might warrant advance notice.
Yet more factual / logical flaws in this one.
First, and most relevant to this conversation, milled Psyllium husk is not a “dietary supplement” in them manner of the specialty amino acids or non-food weeds with unusual chemical properties, as it is also used in cereals and as a thickener in ice cream and the like, and the remaining seed is often included in livestock feeds. This is a benefecial food-grade product. The significant thing about the milled husks is that they do not get absorbed by the body but rather expand in transit and help push things on out.
Second, the sugar spike from the sucrose (table sugar) portion of Metamucil would be rapid
Third, someone with an out of control blood sugar disorder would pushed over the top with a smoothie so prepared would have a hard time isolating blame to that one change, as that little of a change to their sugar intake would have meant they were tottering a the line and just about any added sugar would have pushed them over.
Fourth, sucrose is sucrose, what is used in Metamucil is no harder for a body to dispose of than that found in the white packets at a resturant or sold in 4, 10, and 20 lb bags at the grocery store - it is all the same stuff. Your friends problem was that her health had reached a point where she was having trouble eliminating any sugar.
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rayne89
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I dont think johntkd is trolling he’s been around for quite a while. I’m pretty he’s had other extreme trust issues mentioned on here before something to do with a priest publishing his name in the bulletin or something. It started coming back to me when I looked back at some of his previous posts. I believe the posts on that was lost in the big crash we had last year. (Correct me if I’m wrong John.)
My FIL is just like this actually probably worse. I was just talking about that to my hubby last night. My FIL would probably flip if his wife hid shredded carrots in the meatloaf. And adding a fiber supplement -oh that would be not be pretty, he’d probably kick her out of the house.
My FIL is just like this actually probably worse. I was just talking about that to my hubby last night. My FIL would probably flip if his wife hid shredded carrots in the meatloaf. And adding a fiber supplement -oh that would be not be pretty, he’d probably kick her out of the house.
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wifenmommy
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…then …[SIGN]DONT FEED PEOPLE WHO WANNA PICK A FIGHT!![/SIGN]
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kamz
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I think all of this could have been remedied if the op would not have named this thread “I’m so sneaky” I think people are taking that wrong and also, I myself could give my hubby and smoothie with fiber and after he drinks it and says “that was so good” then I indeed would say “and it had a little fiber and you didn’t even taste it right?” and then from that point it is up to him as an adult to pick up the ball and decide what he wants to do" My hubby is over weight, he knows it and I know it… I make so much healthy foods to encourage him, I encourage him to exercise more and take care of himself, but at the end of the day it is totally up to him… he is a big boy and I can’t “make” him lose weight… I can encourage, love and support him but I can’t “make” him… I wish I could but that only makes us argue… this is his body and I love him very, very much but he has the right to ruin his body and I can only continue to feed him healthy, encourage him to exercise, and most of all pray for him.
So, I don’t think the op is totally wrong but she does need to admit it to her husband at some point and he does have the right to decide if he wants to change things or not… but if he starts complaining about how miserable he is, then she has the right to say, “hey, don’t tell me about it, you and I know what ya gotta do”
So, I don’t think the op is totally wrong but she does need to admit it to her husband at some point and he does have the right to decide if he wants to change things or not… but if he starts complaining about how miserable he is, then she has the right to say, “hey, don’t tell me about it, you and I know what ya gotta do”
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vluvski
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For the record, I did eventually tell my husband that I put the fiber supplements in the smoothie. He groaned then shrugged, but there was no dramatic threat of divorce, no suggestion that he can no longer trust me. He married me knowing full well that I am a tease, a prankster, and especially a sneaky cook. I try to get away with as much as I can, and often make a game out of it, having him guess the secret ingredient.
The whole idea was an experiment. I wanted to find an avenue for the fiber that would be agreeable to him, and apparently it worked. He asked for a smoothie, and taking advantage of the opportunity, I fixed it as I saw fit. As the chief preparer of food in our household, it is always my prerogative to fix meals and snacks as I please. Ever heard of the placebo effect? It works with food, too, and sometimes not for positive results.
They were not brand name Metamucil by the way, but the generic equivalent with orange flavor. He even commented that liked the orange flavor in the smoothie and wanted more orange in it. I told him I could add a lot more orange next time.
The whole idea was an experiment. I wanted to find an avenue for the fiber that would be agreeable to him, and apparently it worked. He asked for a smoothie, and taking advantage of the opportunity, I fixed it as I saw fit. As the chief preparer of food in our household, it is always my prerogative to fix meals and snacks as I please. Ever heard of the placebo effect? It works with food, too, and sometimes not for positive results.
They were not brand name Metamucil by the way, but the generic equivalent with orange flavor. He even commented that liked the orange flavor in the smoothie and wanted more orange in it. I told him I could add a lot more orange next time.
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mariam1976
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THERE U GO!!! all’s well that ends well!!!For the record, I did eventually tell my husband that I put the fiber supplements in the smoothie. He groaned then shrugged, but there was no dramatic threat of divorce, no suggestion that he can no longer trust me. He married me knowing full well that I am a tease, a prankster, and especially a sneaky cook. I try to get away with as much as I can, and often make a game out of it, having him guess the secret ingredient.
The whole idea was an experiment. I wanted to find an avenue for the fiber that would be agreeable to him, and apparently it worked. He asked for a smoothie, and taking advantage of the opportunity, I fixed it as I saw fit. As the chief preparer of food in our household, it is always my prerogative to fix meals and snacks as I please. Ever heard of the placebo effect? It works with food, too, and sometimes not for positive results.
They were not brand name Metamucil by the way, but the generic equivalent with orange flavor. He even commented that liked the orange flavor in the smoothie and wanted more orange in it. I told him I could add a lot more orange next time.
God bless ur marriage… and the love and trust that you have in each other…
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johntkd
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you are very correct about the name publishing by the priest, and it did get me relentless Junk mail for about a month.seems every Kirby salesman had that bulletin.lol
but thats not the issue here lol
Its about having food tampered with , and directly with something a person has already said a positive NO to. thats the point here he said NO she went against his wishes and did it anyways, I actually talked to several people today including my parents and mentioned this particular issue, you all had me thinking i was a little out there, not one of about 20 people I mentioned this to would even dream of doing just this, they agree its total deception and disrespect, and that I am not nuts
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