I'm worried my confession wasn't good enough

[Edmundus1581]

I will try to get in contact with a priest then.

The reason I withheld it was partially fear, but that fear was because I wasn’t sure if the extra detail was needed and since it especially already disgusts me now I didn’t want to say it if I didn’t need to, so I withheld. It wasn’t something I decided to do rigjt away, I was so back and forth and I ended up not doing it.

I’m not in a state of mortal sin, am I? Do I need to confess to receiving communion in mortal sin since I confessed Saturday and went Sunday to mass?

I will eventually confess this for a piece of mind but I will be more rushed if this is a life threatening thing.

As ajecphotos said, now that you have asked the question here you are going to have doubts on all of this until you speak to a priest. In the confessional would be the best place to speak, but you can get advice over the phone. If you talk on the phone you will, hopefully, get the advice “I understand all that, and your confession was valid”. Then you are free of this. Or he may advise “You have to return to the confessional”. Either way, you know.

A phone call or another visit to the confessional may be a bit awkward to set up with how you see your parents’ reaction, but I suggest you this as an opportunity for some independence, and maybe finding that your parents are more understanding than you thought. “Awkward” yes, but difficult, or impossible - I think not.

Having doubts about previous confessions is all part of growing in the sacrament. I think that most of us at some time have had to ask a priest whether a previous confession was valid. As we mature in the faith we understand better both the nature of our sins and the procedure for the sacrament, and then look back and think “I didn’t really confess that properly”. I have asked several times, and each time the answer has been quite firm that I do not have to re-confess. (confessing forgotten sins is a different matter - just confess them next time).

 

[alli124]

I would rather just go back to confession than talk on the phone to be honest.

I just wish I could get a solid answer of whether the detail I left out changes the validity.

I’m sorry I’m just extremely frustated that there are rules about this but the rules are so subjective and not well known.

I’m sure the answer could even differ priest to priest.

Ultimately I will have to reconfess to make myself feel better but it will be a longgg time before my parents will even let me go.

 

[Edmundus1581]

=== GOT THE ANSWER! ====================

How specific in confession?

CAF - Ask An Apologist

Question

If a person has committed a sexual sin, such as pornography or masturbation, can the sin in name only be given? Or **do you have to go into detail about what kind of porn it was (like if it was homosexual in nature, soft vs hard, etc.) **or in the other case, what you fantasized about (like if it were a really dark fantasy)?

(emphasis added)

Answer

You need to name the sin. But you don’t have to go into detail.
For example, just saying “fornication” is enough. One would not have to explaine more about it–unless the priest asks for clarification. When I hear Confessions, if the person confesses having stolen, I always ask what it was that was stolen. It could be five dollars or a Honda SUV. The sin needs to be clearly stated.

Fr. Vincent Serpa, O.P.

 

[alli124]

=== GOT THE ANSWER! ====================

How specific in confession?

CAF - Ask An Apologist

Question

(emphasis added)

Answer

Eee you just made me so happy. Thank you so much!

I had told the priest that I wasn’t sure about the amount of times (I honestly am not sure so I figured it would be better than guessing, he didn’t ask anymore) so I think that part was valid.

I guess this has just been a learning experience. I was only confirmed a couple of years ago, and have only started learning on my own about the faith after committing sins like these.

Even though I was horrible I did I think it has helped me grow for the long run.

Thank you!

 

[Edmundus1581]

You’re welcome, and I’m glad you see it as an opportunity to grow - for it is.

Confession is a wonderful sacrament, and as we use it over the years the more we come to value the sacrifice of Christ, and the mercy he entrusted to his ministers. We also learn how to confess better, for, as with all things, we learn by doing, and asking questions when in doubt.