I am on the “receiving end of all of this”. If that’s what it is suppose to be. I have Schizo-affective disorder, ADD, OCD. Blessed with these traits, what a wonderful thing…Geez. My life was stifled right from the beginning. For almost 50 years now, I have been a victim in one way or another(not to mention being bullied for my clear weakness). Yes. I was bullied and made the fool/stooge all day long, everyday in school since kindergarten, all the way through high school and well into adulthood. For my so called "stupidness, weakness, poor functioning(socially, mentally, academically, ect.). I have been knocked out of any quality of life, seemingly, indefinitely. I have spent most of my life alone, losing touch with the outside. Everyone who I grew up with and many generations after, blow by me with success in their lives, while mine still goes nowhere. I have been through many doctors, psychologists, psychiatrists, counselors, therapists that never really help. And they don’t tell me anything that I already have done research on myself. Medications mask the problems. I exercise when I can, try to eat healthy, try to think as positive as I can, pray. It’s hard to pray when I can’t keep my mind focused, my mind wanders, emotions are flat line, except for depression. I pray for mercy from the Lord. I need a renaissance in my life. Nothing changes. I have done a lot of research into becoming a Catholic, which I desire to do(born and raised Methodist). But it seems so complicated for a simple little man like me. And being in a social environment where I feel like all eyes are watching to make sure I do just what I’m supposed to without making mistakes or something, I have always felt out of place and intimidated in church. I need major intervention. Prayer is wonderful, but I need personal intervention. Please help me. Please don’t forsake me. I have felt left behind all my life. I have a lot to give, given the opportunity.