Impure About Music

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Detente

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Hello,

The question that I am about to present might seem a bit strange upon first glance, but I assure that it is an issue that has been troubling me for the past few weeks.

As is common amongst people, I enjoy listening to music very much, especially as I am about to go to sleep. However, this is where I have encountered a complication. You see, as I listen to the beautiful tunes I can’t help but have impure thoughts about a few of the band members.

The music to me is very important and plays a major role in my day-to-day life. I would become very saddened if I were to even go on a temporary hiatus from the listening process.

What should I do?
 
You can compare this feeling towards the music with how much you love your hands or eyes and what remedy the Lord prescribed for them, if they should become an occasion of sin.

Are the lyrics and the music itself neutral? It is only the mere association of this music with the person(s) who perform it that endangers your purity?

This sucks, but I think the moral choice is pretty clear. It is more important not to offend the Lord by sinning (or the near occasion of sin) than to listen to a beloved piece of music. What you might want to do is abstain from this music for a period of time, like a week, for example, (giving the music in the meantime to someone else for safe keeping) and then come back to it and see if it invokes the same impurities. Alternatively,maybe you can just listen to the music in the company of others, should that prove to be a sufficient enough safeguard against impurity.

May God grant you the grace to have the best of both worlds!
 
Thank you for your kind response. The music itself is not sexual in nature, rather it is the thought of certain members that seems to drive me to distraction.
 
It’s clear from the difficulties you are encountering that you need to find some different music to listen to. Expand your horizons and direct your attention away from those who tempt you to impurity. There’s plenty of beautiful music to enjoy without being tempted.

Betsy
 
I actually listen to a great deal of music, so expansion is not really the question. I really enjoy the music of this particular band, and I suspect that if I were to quit listening to this music I would perhaps start thinking this way without their music or about another band or person(s).
 
How about listening to some “pure” music at bedtime, like Gregorian chant?

Ruthie
 
To be honest, music like that just doesn’t really relax me.
 
Listen to some Motorhead…that Lemmy guy is one ugly dude!!! You’ll never have those kinds of thoughts about him…:cool:

Seriously though, if it’s just this particular band, then you might have to stop listening to them when you are relaxed and going to sleep. Listen to them only when your mind can’t focus on impure thoughts.
 
Thank you for the advice, everyone. However, I am now wondering if I might be suffering from scrupulosity. How much of a problem are these thoughts? I mean, it’s a very human thing to do.
 
Impure thoughts are a serious problem, IMO. Purposelfully dwelling on them or encouraging them is sinful. I don’t think you should listen to this music if you cannot keep a firm grasp on your mind while doing so. I second the advice that has already been given: take a long break from it and try again later. I’ve never had a problem with this particular issue, but when impure thoughs enter my mind it helps me to either think of the Virgin Mary or elderly people (it sounds funny, but it works).
 
Haha, thanks for that, Caesar. Has anyone else dealt with this problem though?
 
Yes it is a very real problem. I too absolutely love music, hard rock in particular. Much of it is far from pure, but there is much that is very good. So it is a lot of work to be able to listen to this music, I really only like rock, but I may find that song gets me down, or makes me think things I wish not to. What happens is that that song must come off of my mp3 player. Before I came to Christ my music library was a lot bigger, but I still have music and now have Christ as well. To lose a little music is a small price.
 
The music is not sexual or questionable in content. I have cut down my listening time, but I have found that I now am beginning to have these thoughts without the accompaniment of the music. I know that this is very human, but I still feel guilty about it, even though my most of my peers and acquaintances tell me that I should not worry over the thoughts. In fact, a few encourage me to dwell upon them and utilize them for personal pleasure. I want to know what the limit is on these types of thoughts. When could it really be considered a problem? After all, every person experiences them at some point.
 
Detente, there is a famous Catholic apologist named Scott Hahn (in another thread he is 2:1 voted the best over his nearest ‘rival’ apologist). He struggled with strong attachments to music and experienced lots of peer pressure. Admittedly, that chapter of his life is mentioned rather briefly in this CD detailing his conversion to first God, and then Catholocism, but you can get a free copy of this CD here: catholicity.com/cds/hahn.html. I hope this will help you. (By the way, his book ‘Rome Sweet Home’ details the conversion story and is probably available at your local library.)

Remember, truth is what sets man free, not supposed friendships here on earth. Seek the Lord always!
 
Detente said:
The music is not sexual or questionable in content. I have cut down my listening time, but I have found that I now am beginning to have these thoughts without the accompaniment of the music. I know that this is very human, but I still feel guilty about it, even though my most of my peers and acquaintances tell me that I should not worry over the thoughts. In fact, a few encourage me to dwell upon them and utilize them for personal pleasure. I want to know what the limit is on these types of thoughts. When could it really be considered a problem? After all, every person experiences them at some point.
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Your peers are completely wrong in their assesment of this situation. Basically, if and when you have impure thoughts pop into your mind, you have one of two choices. You either dwell on these thoughts and enjoy the pleasure they bring you, or you do what you can to not dwell on them and to not think impurely.
Simply having the thougths pop into your head is not sinful at all…it’s what you decide to do in the situation that determines whether it becomes sinful or not…dwelling on the impure thoughts, and especially using them to pleasure yourself, IS sinful.
Get to confession frequently to get graces from God which will help you avoid these sins and get to Holy Communion for more graces to also help you in this.
 
Yes, I know that my friends have shortcomings in their advice. However, I just can’t stop thinking of the guitarist and the way his hands move over that beautiful instrument. You guys must think I’m crazy.
 
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