Impurity - Thoughts, Confession, Bad Thoughts

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BrockH

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What can I do about this?..I am a scrupulous person with some obsessive compulsive tendencies. I have been going to Confession almost weekly for impure sexual thoughts…Please help me…I’m in almost constant misery and the temptation is growing STRONGER…I am almost to the point of falling and probably already have… Help!
 
+JMJ+

I assume you were diagnosed with obssessive compulsive disorder by a health professional if you are able to say such about yourself. Therefore, first, do whatever your mental health professional tells you. If needed, call him/her right now.
 
All sorts of thoughts can happen to us out of the blue…

The fact that a though happened to one- does not mean per se there was any sin.

And for mortal sin one needs grave matter, full knowledge and deliberate (complete) consent…
Now…

For the next few moments --try real hard NOT to think of an Apple.

then scroll down.

What did you think of?

An apple.

Even though your will was against it -you did not want to think of an apple.

Now back to unwanted thoughts…

The best thing to do with such thoughts is not to fight them directly --not fear that they will come—simply do not consent and simply and calmly turn to something else…(or it may be best to keep doing the good thing one is doing…like they come out of the blue when your at work …keep working…keep praying …etc)

Ignore such unwanted thoughts like one would ignore a hissing goose or a barking dog. One does not stop to argue with a hissing goose or a barking dog does one? No one keeps on walking…

(as noted above the image there comes from a Carthusian Monk from centuries ago…)
 
A person struggles with scruples - what ought they do?

A person with scrupulosity --ought to have a* “regular confessor” who can direct them --and even give them some general principles* to follow -to apply (principles for them due to their particular scruples -they are usually not for those with a normal conscience).

Thus with their direction they can “dismiss scruples” (in the older language despise them) - “act against them” (agere contra).

Scruples are to be dismissed ~ not argued with.

To borrow and image from a Carthusian from centuries ago: Scruples *are like a barking dog or a hissing goose -one does not stop to argue with a barking dog or a hissing goose does one? * No one keeps walking.

Such ‘obedience’ to a regular confessor who knows of ones scruples (except in what is manifest sin - such as if he told them it was ok to murder someone or something certain like that) is key. Such is the age old practice.

Also counseling -(especially if one also has OCD) could be helpful depending on the case -but one would want to look for a counselor who can assist one in following the Churches Teachings - not go contrary to them (I have heard CA staff mention catholictherapists.com/)

Here was a not too long ago post from Jimmy Akin of CA that I saw in the Register and saved for those who struggle with such.

ncregister.com/blog/jimmy-akin/6-tools-for-the-scrupulous

Remember all sorts of thoughts can happen to one and one NOT sin at all. (see above post). Hence when there is not an sin…there is nothing needed for confession…

Talk with your confessor about when you ought to confess or not confess in the future.
 
It isn’t the thoughts that pop into the mind that are sins. It is what is done with them.

No thought, without deliberation, makes for sin or makes a person impure. As a matter of fact, when offered to God and resisted, that actually makes a person more holy in the sight of God no matter how ugly the thought may look to us.

It may be difficult to understand and accept that since so often a person may have given into it. And therefore by past association with these thoughts, it may seem evil even when the thought enters our mind. But God looks upon it as a suffering of love done in his name and will reward you for it.

Try to keep Jesus and Mary in the forefront of your mind and intentions. For that is why you are being faithful to your faith. Trying to fight a sin in itself sometimes doesn’t have much meaning because it is an objective thought and not some person(s) whom you are giving your love to.

Think of Jesus’ sufferings on the cross for you as much as you can out of his love for you. He loves you today as much as he loved you then on that cross. This will make you draw closer to him and give you the strength to do all out of love for him. Keep a picture of him close to you, his face if possible, so that it will be easier for you to make him real, which he is. He is closer to you than your own thoughts. Love him often and tell him so, and ask for his strength and comfort to please him.

May the Lord give you his strength and bless you.
 
If you suffer from scrupulosity, you need to meet with the priest and inquire about finding a spiritual director.
 
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