J
jazzy0710
Guest
Hey everyone,
I’m sure most of you remember the very first post that I ever made on here asking for suggestions on how to deal with these people. Most felt that I needed to distance myself from them because they are toxic people.
Let’s fast forward a few months. My Husband’s stepmother apologized to me for her behavior at my husband’s birthday dinner, I accepted the apology.
Now there’s good days and bad days. They’re nice people, it’s just they sometimes act without thinking first and do some really stupid things.
My husband’s stepmother still struggles with boundaries. When she and my father in law got married in April 2011, my husband clearly explained to her that he supported their marriage and was happy for them, but to keep in mind that she is not to try and replace his Mom. That he would only call her by her first name because he has a Mom and don’t expect him to ever call her Mom.
She gives us cards and leaves messages for us on our computer signed love Mom and Dad. To top it all off she also went out and got my husband and his sister’s names tattooed on her chest along with her own children from her previous marriage. We found out that she tells people that they are her kids.
Alright now here’s the latest dillema. My husband and I live in an apartment building in a very nice area of town.
When they got married, my Father in law owned a house (still does) about a 10 minute drive from us. His new wife also owned a house about a 20 minute drive from us.
She didn’t want to move into his house with him when they got married because she felt that it was too small for him, her, and his daughter(my sister in law lives in his house alone, she’s got a foot condition that prevents her from working so she’s on disability). His new wife sold her house that she owned and they bought a trailor in a town about a 45 minute drive away. My sister in law was worried about them having to pay a mortgage on 2 places when they already have 2 vehicles,and although she only makes a small amount of money on disability if my father in law had of sold his house she was willing to go live with them in the trailor if they let her, and would contribute towards groceries, water, and power.
The new wife said that the trailor wasn’t big enough for the 3 of them so no.
My husband and I asked them are you sure that you want to move out there because it’ll be a lot of traveling back and forth. They were sure claiming that it’s not that bad. Now this was around this past September or October I do believe.
Last month they finally decided that it was too much traveling back and forth and that they wanted to be closer to their children. Now with my father in law’s income from work, and his wife’s income from disability(she messed up her shoulder) plus the inheritance that she got from her Mother; they could easily get another house, or even a fairly decent condo style apartment. What did they do? THEY APPLIED IN THE BUILDING DIRECTLY BESIDE MY HUSBAND AND I!!!
My husband told them that he felt it was sort of indiscreet and way too close. His step mother was somewhat offended and couldn’t see why it was such a big deal.
My husband and I walked by the superintendant the other day. She says to us, “Hey, I met your mother the other day!” As I said, this woman really has it in her head that she is my husband’s mother and tells people she is. My husband corrected her right away and told her that she wasn’t his mother that he already has one.
These two continuously send my husband and I text messages several times a day.They claim that we don’t have to worry that they won’t be over here every day and that they won’t bother us. They say that now, but my husband and I know what they are like.If we don’t answer out phone, they’ll be ringing the buzzer and banging on our windows. If they become a big problem and won’t leave us alone, as soon as my husband stands up to his Father, his father will blame it on me.
Now my husband and I have been planning on moving for a year now because we want something with more space because we want to have kids. We were looking for a specific area, and I put on my facebook did anyone know of anything in that area? Of course my husband’s stepmother had to throw her two cents in there. Her reply was “good luck. hubby and I tried to find something over there and the cheapest 2 bedroom we could find was 950.00. I honestly hope that we can be neighbours for as bit”.
We felt like we’re being smothered! Sometimes they treat my husband, especially his sister, me, and my sister in law’s boyfriend, like we are all children. We aren’t. My husband is going to be 30 years old at the end of the summer! I’m 26, my sister in law is 26 and her boyfriend is 25. We’re adults! What would you do? Please help!
I’m sure most of you remember the very first post that I ever made on here asking for suggestions on how to deal with these people. Most felt that I needed to distance myself from them because they are toxic people.
Let’s fast forward a few months. My Husband’s stepmother apologized to me for her behavior at my husband’s birthday dinner, I accepted the apology.
Now there’s good days and bad days. They’re nice people, it’s just they sometimes act without thinking first and do some really stupid things.
My husband’s stepmother still struggles with boundaries. When she and my father in law got married in April 2011, my husband clearly explained to her that he supported their marriage and was happy for them, but to keep in mind that she is not to try and replace his Mom. That he would only call her by her first name because he has a Mom and don’t expect him to ever call her Mom.
She gives us cards and leaves messages for us on our computer signed love Mom and Dad. To top it all off she also went out and got my husband and his sister’s names tattooed on her chest along with her own children from her previous marriage. We found out that she tells people that they are her kids.
Alright now here’s the latest dillema. My husband and I live in an apartment building in a very nice area of town.
When they got married, my Father in law owned a house (still does) about a 10 minute drive from us. His new wife also owned a house about a 20 minute drive from us.
She didn’t want to move into his house with him when they got married because she felt that it was too small for him, her, and his daughter(my sister in law lives in his house alone, she’s got a foot condition that prevents her from working so she’s on disability). His new wife sold her house that she owned and they bought a trailor in a town about a 45 minute drive away. My sister in law was worried about them having to pay a mortgage on 2 places when they already have 2 vehicles,and although she only makes a small amount of money on disability if my father in law had of sold his house she was willing to go live with them in the trailor if they let her, and would contribute towards groceries, water, and power.
The new wife said that the trailor wasn’t big enough for the 3 of them so no.
My husband and I asked them are you sure that you want to move out there because it’ll be a lot of traveling back and forth. They were sure claiming that it’s not that bad. Now this was around this past September or October I do believe.
Last month they finally decided that it was too much traveling back and forth and that they wanted to be closer to their children. Now with my father in law’s income from work, and his wife’s income from disability(she messed up her shoulder) plus the inheritance that she got from her Mother; they could easily get another house, or even a fairly decent condo style apartment. What did they do? THEY APPLIED IN THE BUILDING DIRECTLY BESIDE MY HUSBAND AND I!!!
My husband told them that he felt it was sort of indiscreet and way too close. His step mother was somewhat offended and couldn’t see why it was such a big deal.
My husband and I walked by the superintendant the other day. She says to us, “Hey, I met your mother the other day!” As I said, this woman really has it in her head that she is my husband’s mother and tells people she is. My husband corrected her right away and told her that she wasn’t his mother that he already has one.
These two continuously send my husband and I text messages several times a day.They claim that we don’t have to worry that they won’t be over here every day and that they won’t bother us. They say that now, but my husband and I know what they are like.If we don’t answer out phone, they’ll be ringing the buzzer and banging on our windows. If they become a big problem and won’t leave us alone, as soon as my husband stands up to his Father, his father will blame it on me.
Now my husband and I have been planning on moving for a year now because we want something with more space because we want to have kids. We were looking for a specific area, and I put on my facebook did anyone know of anything in that area? Of course my husband’s stepmother had to throw her two cents in there. Her reply was “good luck. hubby and I tried to find something over there and the cheapest 2 bedroom we could find was 950.00. I honestly hope that we can be neighbours for as bit”.
We felt like we’re being smothered! Sometimes they treat my husband, especially his sister, me, and my sister in law’s boyfriend, like we are all children. We aren’t. My husband is going to be 30 years old at the end of the summer! I’m 26, my sister in law is 26 and her boyfriend is 25. We’re adults! What would you do? Please help!
I will definitely ask St. Monica for her intercession