In-laws baptized our children without permission

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Canons State that a baptism can only be done against the parents wishes in cases of death.
No, that is not what Canon Law says. Canon Law says it is done licitly in such a case. but it does not state that parental permission is required for validity. That is an important distinction.

It is clear you are not understanding the difference between valid and licit. What part of that is confusing you?
May the Lord have mercy on those victims of this situation, the children.
Agreed
 
As an eastern catholic, I find this disccusion a little strange primarily:

How can the baptism be valid when it was in violation of canon law, and with the spirit of deciet and abuse?
Because the law itself says so.
 
See this is where the Latin rite needing clarification. In the eastern rite a baptism is always done by the clergy, except in cases of emergency. This is historically the view of Rome as well. As has already been shown canon laws do change over time. Ill have a look at the canons tonight
 
See this is where the Latin rite needing clarification. In the eastern rite a baptism is always done by the clergy, except in cases of emergency. This is historically the view of Rome as well. As has already been shown canon laws do change over time. Ill have a look at the canons tonight
Yes, the usual minister of baptism is the child’s pastor or someone he appoints; deacons, priests and bishops are ordinary ministers of the sacrament. Still, midwives and nurses have historically been given instruction on how to do baptisms, so that any child who was not likely to survive a difficult birth or a serious illness could have the benefit of emergency baptism. (Neonates who get seriously ill can reach the point of death with very little notice.)

Baptism is so necessary that even an unbaptized person can validly confer baptism, although this is only licit when there is an emergency such that an ordinary minister cannot be had in time. In my time, we learned this when we learned about baptism–that is, that *in an emergency *anyone could do it to save a person from dying without baptism, if they knew the proper elements needed–so that we would know to baptize an unbaptized person in danger of death who wanted it or who was so ill-disposed that they could not ask for it if they did. The danger of sudden death is not so prevalent as it once was, however. Nowadays, people expect to be too busy calling 9-11 to do a baptism.
 
You did notice the coincidence that she is not Catholic? That could account for your meeting of the minds. 😉
Haha, yes. After a few threads I realized most of the people that made sense to me we’re the non-Catholics; mainly atheists. I guess that remark kind of let the cat out of the bag regarding my beliefs. 😉
 
I’m sorry that this happened to your family. You in-laws were wrong to do this without your consent. Is this a pattern of them disregarding your parenting decisions? I’m wondering if this was more about them engaging in a power struggle with you and your wife and less about piety and concern for the children. I have had my in-laws cross the line in appalling ways, so I get it. My in-laws are never left alone with my kids. I hope you are able to find another child-care arrangement that will be less strained and put you at ease.
 
I’m sorry that this happened to your family. You in-laws were wrong to do this without your consent. Is this a pattern of them disregarding your parenting decisions? I’m wondering if this was more about them engaging in a power struggle with you and your wife and less about piety and concern for the children. I have had my in-laws cross the line in appalling ways, so I get it. My in-laws are never left alone with my kids. I hope you are able to find another child-care arrangement that will be less strained and put you at ease.
Based on my experience with grandparents, it had everything to do with letting piety (and pious fear) overwhelm them. Grandparents who will otherwise submit to their children’s parenting rules can fall to this one, because they believe it is an eternal safety issue. The OP and his wife, bless their hearts, understand this about his in-laws, and have compassion on them about their unfortunate lack of self-control.

The Church, however, teaches us to trust God more and to resist the temptation to overrule the natural rights of others. We have to respect that there is a lot of authority that God does not grant to us and so force ourselves not to grasp for authority not given to us, even with the best of intentions. That is the bottom line on this one.
 
Based on my experience with grandparents, it had everything to do with letting piety (and pious fear) overwhelm them. Grandparents who will otherwise submit to their children’s parenting rules can fall to this one, because they believe it is an eternal safety issue. The OP and his wife, bless their hearts, understand this about his in-laws, and have compassion on them about their unfortunate lack of self-control.

The Church, however, teaches us to trust God more and to resist the temptation to overrule the natural rights of others. We have to respect that there is a lot of authority that God does not grant to us and so force ourselves not to grasp for authority not given to us, even with the best of intentions. That is the bottom line on this one.
Perfectly said : )
 
So what happens to the babies who are baptized by nurses who think they are going to die but the babies recover? Do the nurses have a duty to inform the parents that their child is now Catholic and they have to register the child with a parish?
 
So what happens to the babies who are baptized by nurses who think they are going to die but the babies recover? Do the nurses have a duty to inform the parents that their child is now Catholic and they have to register the child with a parish?
The way I understand it; the baptism doesn’t make the child Catholic, in fact they trained all nurses (not just Catholic nurses) to baptize babies who were about to die in case the parents were indeed Catholic (or Methodist, Lutheran, Anglican, etc…) if they couldn’t find out fast enough. The nurse would then have a duty to inform, or their superior may inform, the parent. If the parents wished, they could then document it, but they would be documenting a baptism in general not one into any formal organized church. ETA: of course, then, if the proper form was followed, it would be recognized in the RCC.
 
A couple of quick thoughts on this topic:
  1. To the OP, please consider finding a good family counselor and making it mandatory for your in-laws to attend a session with you and your spouse if they want any more than minimal access to your children. Based on what you have said and the attitude of some who have posted here, it seems likely that they don’t realize the breach of trust they have caused and how they need to accept that failure and work to restore the trust. Otherwise, there is a lot of potential for future problems, especially if the begin to delude themselves into thinking they are “martyrs” bringing the faith to your kids.
  2. In terms of the validity of the “baptism” I don’t think the situation is as straightforward as some might think. Valid adult baptism can only occur wit the consent of the baptized.
Infant baptism can occur because the church teaches that consent can be provided on behalf of the infant by the parents/godparents. In the canon law citations provided earlier in the thread, it was pointed out that anyone could baptise in danger of death. In that situation the church vouches for the infant and provides consent, making the baptism valid.

In this situation, with no danger of death, the church has made no commitment to vouch for the infant and validate the action of the grandparents. The grandparents in and of themselves have no authority to consent for the children, and if the church doesn’t provide that authority (and it makes no claim to do so outside of a situation involving immediate danger of death) it may well be the case that a valid baptism did not occur.

I would be interested to see if anyone has any authoritative documents that speak to this situation of illicit baptism without immediate danger of death.
 
Are you equating the opinion of a university professor to an authoritative pronouncement of the church?

That dog doesn’t hunt.
The law itself gives us the answer. The law states what is necessary for validity and then it states what is necessary for licety. Validity and licety are two different things.

I am sorry so many people cannot understand that. The section regarding permission of at least one parent clearly states it is for LICETY. If it meant for validity, it would say for validity. It does not.

The article I linked to is a nice explanation of the law.
 
Are you equating the opinion of a university professor to an authoritative pronouncement of the church?

That dog doesn’t hunt.
1ke did not cite that article as *proof *of her answer, but as a *very competent explanation *of the Church’s position.

1ke happens to be well-educated on what canon law means when it says that a sacrament is valid although not licit. As she has pointed out more than once, the unequivocal answer to the question is in the Church’s authoritative documents, including canon law. This is not some esoteric question that never comes up, but a common question that has a short clear answer. The described baptisms would not be rendered invalid by the person who performed them or by the failure to obtain parental consent, but only by some failure to perform the baptism according to the required formula. The pastor would undoubtedly want to interview the grandparents before recording these baptisms, but it is most likely that the children have been validly baptized.
 
The law itself gives us the answer. The law states what is necessary for validity and then it states what is necessary for licety. Validity and licety are two different things.

I am sorry so many people cannot understand that. The section regarding permission of at least one parent clearly states it is for LICETY. If it meant for validity, it would say for validity. It does not.

The article I linked to is a nice explanation of the law.
I understand that there is a distinction. I also understand that consent is required for baptism to be valid. In adult baptism the individual must consent, in the case of an infant, typically the parents/godparents consent on behalf of the child, although the church reserves the right to do so “in danger of death”.

Who in the scenario of the grandparents was authorized to provide consent on behalf of the child?
1ke did not cite that article as *proof *of her answer, but as a *very competent explanation *of the Church’s position.

1ke happens to be well-educated on what canon law means when it says that a sacrament is valid although not licit. As she has pointed out more than once, the unequivocal answer to the question is in the Church’s authoritative documents, including canon law. This is not some esoteric question that never comes up, but a common question that has a short clear answer. The described baptisms would not be rendered invalid by the person who performed them or by the failure to obtain parental consent, but only by some failure to perform the baptism according to the required formula. The pastor would undoubtedly want to interview the grandparents before recording these baptisms, but it is most likely that the children have been validly baptized.
Apparently both of you get used to answering the same question and fail to notice when a different one is being asked. I agree that typically a parent’s consent is required for licity, but the church dispense’s with that in certain circumstances.

My point is that baptism without the consent of the baptized (or the consent of one authorized to provide consent on behalf of the one being baptized) is not valid. No forced baptisms, even with water and the right words/intent. That’s why you can’t drive down the street with a super soaker and conduct ambush baptisms.

Parents/godparents can consent on behalf of the child, and the church reserves the right to provide that consent “in danger of death”. In both cases, with proper form and matter, a valid and licit baptism occurs.

Likewise, if a parent baptises their child at home, they are able to provide consent, and you have a baptism that is not licit, but is valid, if proper form and matter were used.

If someone who is not authorized to provide consent on behalf of an infant (such as grandparents) attempts to baptise that infant when the infant is not “in danger of death”, please provide something authoritative to demonstrate that the church also extends its provision of consent in this circumstance as well. Otherwise, it’s the same as throwing water at someone in the street who hasn’t provided consent to be baptized-not valid.

I’m open to being corrected, but a quote from a university professor who isn’t answering the question I’m asking doesn’t suffice, regardless of the use of bold and italics in the reply to me.
 
I understand that there is a distinction. I also understand that consent is required for baptism to be valid. In adult baptism the individual must consent, in the case of an infant, typically the parents/godparents consent on behalf of the child, although the church reserves the right to do so “in danger of death”.
No, consent is not required for infants. You keep asserting that and you have never provided a source to back up your claim. 1ke has provided multiple sources to prove you are wrong.
 
I understand that there is a distinction. I also understand that consent is required for baptism to be valid.
NO, this is not accurate. This is where your misunderstanding lies.
Anziano said:
My point is that baptism without the consent of the baptized (or the consent of one authorized to provide consent on behalf of the one being baptized) is not valid.
This isn’t true.
 
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