In need of your advice: Was this a sin?

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MarieVeronica

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Dear CAF members. This is kind of complicated, and I’m extremely scrupulous… so I appreciate your careful consideration of my question.

Here’s what happened.

I went to the grocery store this evening. It is the grocery store, where I worked for almost 8 years. I have a lot of friends there, still.

So, I went to the deli… and ordered two 6 inch sub sandwiches. One for me, and one for my sister. But, they were two different fillings (meats, cheese, etc.). I know the store policy, that when two 6 inch subs are sold, they must be wrapped and priced separately. This makes them more expensive than a single, foot long sub.

The lady who made my sandwiches is an old friend. And I noticed, too late… (but before I left the store with them)… that she had packaged and priced them as a SINGLE, foot long sub. This made the two sandwiches less expensive. This is against store policy.

Well, I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t give them back to her, because she would have to “damage” them (toss them in the trash; again, store policy; they are not permitted to re-sell sandwiches, which are wrapped in the deli paper). That’s wasting food, which is a sin. I couldn’t just set it down, either. Because that is ALSO wasting food. A sin.

So… I went through the line with it, and paid for it. I didn’t say anything to the cashier, because I didn’t want to get my friend into trouble (if reported, she could lose her job; I’ve seen it happen). I realized, she was trying to “do me a favor” for old times sake… although, I did not ask her to do this.

Did I commit a sin by walking away with and paying for those two sandwiches? If so, how can I rectify this? It was ironic, since I had stopped at the store… on my way back from my monthly confession. 😦 Thanks in advance, for your opinions. God bless.
 
*I see your concern with it. Maybe telling the cashier to ring it up as two separate subs would have been the right thing in hind sight…you could always call the store, and say…“you know what, this sandwich should have been rung up as two separate sandwiches…I wasn’t paying attention to it when I was receiving it from the deli.” If they say, “oh, don’t worry about it”…you’ve at least brought it to their attention. It wasn’t purposeful on your part, you weren’t meaning to get away with anything. But, I’d call the store, and just explain what happened…and then, pay for it the next time you stop in the store. (if they think it’s necessary)

But, don’t feel badly…you didn’t intentionally try to get away with anything. *
 
Regarding your friend getting in trouble…she probably shouldn’t have done it…she doesn’t own the store, so going against store policy to give you a nice gesture not sure it was the wise thing to do on her part, although she meant well. I would try to leave her out of it as much as you feasibly can…just say that it was an oversight, and you’d like to pay for it when you come back. Just my thoughts on it, what I might do in your shoes. :o
 
Thank you, “Weg”. The next time we’re in that store, I will go to the Customer Service desk… and explain, personally… what happened. I just hope that they don’t ask me to identify the deli employee (my friend) who did this. I can’t say… “I don’t know”… or “I don’t remember”… because that would be a lie. They could also ask me that question, over the phone.

WHY do things like this happen? 😦

I hope that anyone who reads this thread… will realize, that is is NOT “ok” to do this sort of thing… “for a friend”.

It is stealing from the store. Plain and simple. :sad_yes:
 
MarieVeronica said:
Thank you, “Weg”. The next time we’re in that store, I will go to the Customer Service desk… and explain, personally… what happened. I just hope that they don’t ask me to identify the deli employee (my friend) who did this. I can’t say… “I don’t know”… or “I don’t remember”… because that would be a lie. They could also ask me that question, over the phone.

WHY do things like this happen? 😦

I hope that anyone who reads this thread… will realize, that is is NOT “ok” to do this sort of thing… “for a friend”.

It is stealing from the store. Plain and simple. :sad_yes:
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You’re totally right. Some places that are a little more laid back allow their employees to give discounts to friends, or free services (like taking a friend to a movie screening for free the day before release) but if it is against store policy, it’s wrong.

Did your friend say she was going to give you a break on the sandwiches? It could have just happened that she made a mistake in pricing because she was chatting with you. 🤷

Either way, you could have told the cashier, but you didn’t think of it. You weren’t purposefully trying to get away with cheaper sandwiches, and you were concerned your friend may have done it on purpose which could cost her her job. I don’t think you did anything wrong, and if you feel you did you can always go to confession and maybe the priest as a solution to make it right.
 
I just want to add that you did not do anything wrong.

Was is wrong of your friend to give you the discount? Yes.
Did you ask her to do it? No.
You did nothing wrong, and in my opinion you are not even obligated to pay the store the difference.

As you mentioned in your original post, you are a scrupulous person. I hope you are not worrying yourself over this.
 
I agree. You did not do anything wrong & certainly did not commit a sin. God knows your heart. He knows you & saw how you struggled in the store between getting your friend in trouble & wasting food, etc… God appreciates your concern, he blesses you for it, & wants you to be at peace after your confession.🙂
 
Take the extra couple of bucks and put it in the poor box at Mass tomorrow 🙂
 
If you want to, you can anonymously mail the difference to the store.

But, the bigger issue here is that something so small and insignificant is bothering you so much. Scruples of this kind are a symptom of obsessive compulsive disorder. You should consider seeing a doctor about it, because I am betting you constantly worry about little things that the average person never even considers.
 
*I don’t necessarily consider it to be something ‘‘small,’’ as in silly to worry over. I understand your thoughts on this Marie…I wouldn’t lose sleep over it, though. You didn’t do anything wrong. Your friend was trying to be nice, although it’s not her place to give away food, it isn’t her store. Maybe the next time, if she tries it again, just say, you know, thanks, but just package it correctly, please. Nothing more or less to say about it.

I like kage’s idea of putting it in the poor box at mass! If you feel it might get your friend in trouble, if you have to i.d. the person, then it might be a better route to do something like that with the money. God bless, and don’t worry. :o*
 
I really think the poor box is a great idea and An Act of Contrition should help settle the matter. Amen
 
MarieVeronica said:
Dear CAF members. This is kind of complicated, and I’m extremely scrupulous… so I appreciate your careful consideration of my question.

Here’s what happened.

I went to the grocery store this evening. It is the grocery store, where I worked for almost 8 years. I have a lot of friends there, still.

So, I went to the deli… and ordered two 6 inch sub sandwiches. One for me, and one for my sister. But, they were two different fillings (meats, cheese, etc.). I know the store policy, that when two 6 inch subs are sold, they must be wrapped and priced separately. This makes them more expensive than a single, foot long sub.

The lady who made my sandwiches is an old friend. And I noticed, too late… (but before I left the store with them)… that she had packaged and priced them as a SINGLE, foot long sub. This made the two sandwiches less expensive. This is against store policy.

Well, I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t give them back to her, because she would have to “damage” them (toss them in the trash; again, store policy; they are not permitted to re-sell sandwiches, which are wrapped in the deli paper). That’s wasting food, which is a sin. I couldn’t just set it down, either. Because that is ALSO wasting food. A sin.

So… I went through the line with it, and paid for it. I didn’t say anything to the cashier, because I didn’t want to get my friend into trouble (if reported, she could lose her job; I’ve seen it happen). I realized, she was trying to “do me a favor” for old times sake… although, I did not ask her to do this.

Did I commit a sin by walking away with and paying for those two sandwiches? If so, how can I rectify this? It was ironic, since I had stopped at the store… on my way back from my monthly confession. 😦 Thanks in advance, for your opinions. God bless.
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You committed NO sin. You didn’t do the wrapping. Your friend committed the sin of being kind, and treating you with the priveleges of someone worked there for years and years. We have a policy in the library I work in, to treat our oldest and honoured retired faculty this way.
 
whatevergirl said:
I don’t necessarily consider it to be something ‘‘small,’’ as in silly to worry over.
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The OP has made posts like this before, about some things that aren’t even sins. It can’t be an enjoyable life to always worry.
 
*Marie–I used to be a worrier, and a wise priest told me during confession one day that worrying is a sin. 😛 Can you believe it? He said it with a laugh ;), but basically said that when we worry, we waste time not giving things to God, and dwelling on things that are past. Can’t change the past. Can only move forward. That changed a lot for me, so I’d not worry over this…you are not at fault…and I think kage’s advice about the poor box is perfect. 🙂 *
 
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