In RCIA and preparing for my first confession

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I am in RCIA and preparing for my first confession. I am just so nervous that the priest will judge me then and latter on. How do you get over this feeling? I realize that they are not there to judge you, but having a hard time realizing this.
 
recognize that feeling for what it is, a healthy guilt that leads to true contrition, and pray from that feeling, as part of your preparation for confession. Yes the priest will judge, not you yourself, but your actions, that is his job, so that he can best counsel you and help you. If you can once realize that he stands in the person of Christ, so it is Christ you are speaking with and who is absolving you, the fear will recede. This realization comes over time, the more you take advantage of this sacrament of Divine Mercy and love

Welcome Home
 
From John 8:3-11:
Then the scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery and made her stand in the middle. They said to him, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the very act of committing adultery. Now in the law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?” They said this to test him, so that they could have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and began to write on the ground with his finger. But when they continued asking him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again he bent down and wrote on the ground. And in response, they went away one by one, beginning with the elders. So he was left alone with the woman before him. Then Jesus straightened up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” She replied, “No one, sir.” Then Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you. Go, (and) from now on do not sin any more.”
You are expecting the priest to act like the Pharisees in this story. From my experience, he is much more likely to act like Jesus.
 
I combat this kind of fear by going all the way in the other direction. I view the confessional as the only place where I can reveal myself fully, with all my faults and terrible sins, and be completely safe doing so. The priest is not there to hold those things against me, but to take them away. So I tell the most humiliating thing first with complete sincerity, and then everything else is easier.

Anywhere else, with anyone else but Jesus in the person of the priest, it would be really dangerous to reveal myself with such radical sincerity - relationships could be damaged, my reputation would be in tatters, feelings hurt, etc. But it’s actually kind of thrilling to say these dangerous things in the safe environment of confession, and then to come out forgiven and healed.

Others will tell you rightly that the priest has literally heard everything already and that you cannot shock him. He also has the grace to forget what he hears. And the more serious the sins are, the happier he is to remove those burdens from you. Have no fear!

And welcome home!

Betsy
 
The sacrament of Reconciliation is a sacrament of healing - not punishment. See the priest as an MD. God heals us through doctors just as He heals us through the priest in the confessional.
 
As my regular confessor tells me frequently “Be not afraid!”. I think part of the fear stems from the work of the enemy… Why? If you’re forgiven of your sins, he cannot hold them against you. When one is in a state of mortal sin, they are in a state of being separated from the Body of Christ, and therefore usually more suceptible to straying further and further from that Body and from the graces that flow from that Body and possibly into the hands of the enemy. In confession, it is like saying “To hell with you, Satan,”.

I see confession like this: when I was a little kid and was bullied on the playground (and usually was just as rotten to the bully (or Satan) in response), I would run to the teacher, and tattle on that person. I didn’t like telling on that person to the teacher because I knew the bad behavior I had participated in would come to light, but that was also needed so I could learn how to do better the next time (like telling the teacher before I started throwing rocks at the other person… 😉 ) The same way, in the confessional, I am tattling on Satan, and in addition, I’m tattling on myself… the priest gives me advise on how to better avoid that situation again, and through the power and grace from the Sacrament, I am better equiped to deal with it in the future.

I usually am a nervious wreck before confession, and I go at least every other week. I know the priest isn’t going to judge me, and only has my spiritual health and best interests at heart, and also that afterwards, I will come out feeling much better and “squeeky clean”, but the fear is still there. I pray to St. Michael for his intercession before hand, and a prayer of gratitude afterwards before I complete my assigned penance.

Let us know when your first confession is, so we can be praying for you!

Ericka
 
I am in RCIA right now and we just had a talk about the sacrament of reconciliation. We were told we could/should tell the priest it was our first time going to confession and he would “walk us through it”. We were also given a small pamphet describing the steps. It looks pretty helpful. Maybe your RCIA director has a booklet too(if you don’t already have one). Try and think of it as a way to enhance your relationship with the Church and your community. By going you are showing you want to grow and change behaviors that hurt relationships. Good luck!
 
We were given a brief overview of confession in our class. I think they’re devoting a future class entirely to it.
 
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