N
Nanotwerp
Guest
I don’t understand if I’m actually an individual or not; if my personality is even my own. I’ve been recently reminded that we are born a ‘blank slate’, meaning we learn through our environment, slowly grasping to other’s customs and habits. I feel like I’m just a parasitic leech that grew to become its own ‘person’. Are we as humans really different from another, or are we a huge crowd with no individuality? Does God really make us different from one another? Are we really that special? I guarantee there’s another person with an almost exact same personality as me; this, in a way, makes me less ‘special’, in my own eyes. What about in heaven? Will we just be a crowd under the beatific vision; not as individuals, but members of a common crowd? I could be but one person out of possible millions who make it to heaven. Are there individual sheep in the flock of it all? If it were, I want to be the sheep that stands out of the flock, to be one of a kind; that seems rather impossible now and forever. Pray a prayer to obtain graces; now what? I put the mail in the mailbox, just to get no reply back. I guess there’s no reason to pray if God only answers prayers when he wants to. Maybe I could have been born more favorable in God’s eyes, like Mary, the Apostles, or the people he let witness miracles; sadly, I’m not. I’m just another human that might receive beatific vision, or might suffer eternal damnation, in the whole scope of things.