Info please regarding a marriage

[XinMinny]

Hi. And, thanks for the help ahead of time. I have a friend of Jewish heritage whose spouse is of Catholic heritage. The Catholic would like to become re-involved in the church, and understands that some of the details about their marriage may prohibit the participation in the sacraments.

Neither has been very involved with their faith for many years, including when they were married (I don’t know the details of the wedding - church, priest, etc…). Now, the Catholic wants become more active again, and it seems the marriage is an impediment to the partaking of the sacraments.

So, the question is: How can the marriage be worked with to give the Catholic partner liberty to partake of the sacraments, if the Jewish partner has no interest in being part of the Catholic faith community?

Thanks.

 

[davidv]

Hi. And, thanks for the help ahead of time. I have a friend of Jewish heritage whose spouse is of Catholic heritage. The Catholic would like to become re-involved in the church, and understands that some of the details about their marriage may prohibit the participation in the sacraments.

So, the question is: How can the marriage be worked with to grant the Catholic partner room to partake of the sacraments, if the Jewish partner has no interest in being part of the Catholic faith community?

Thank you for your help.

Since the conditions surrounding her present situation weigh heavily on the answer, it is best the she speak with her pastor about the particulars and determine if and how there may be any impediment to the sacraments, and what could be done to remove those impediments.

To attempt analyze it here with the information provided, is pure speculation .

 

[Corki]

You don’t know enough details. However, it sounds like the problem is that they got married outside of the Church. A Catholic is obligated always to marry in the Church or to get a dispensation. If that did not happen, they have an irregular marriage.

If they were both free to marry at the time, fixing a marriage that is irregular in this way (called lack of form) is not too complicated. It does not require the non-Catholic partner to become involved in the Catholic Church.

If there was someother problem at the time of the marriage such as an earlier marriage/divorce, it can get more complicated.

The Catholic just needs to meet with her/his priest who will help them with all the steps.

 

[XinMinny]

Thank you Michael Francis for merging this. I was not sure which forum it needed to be in.

 

[Catholic1954]

The Catholic must seek the advice of their pastor. He will be in the best position to help and start any paperwork for an annulment.

 

[Lubomyr]

How is the Catholic going alone to church on Sunday mornings *not *the obvious solution?

 

[XinMinny]

How is the Catholic going alone to church on Sunday mornings *not *the obvious solution?

Being able to go to church is not the problem, so going alone can’t be the solution.

The problem is that the couple were not married in the church in the first place. Neither he nor she was practicing their faith for the first many years of the marriage. That is how a person of Jewish heritage and one of Catholic heritage ended up married.

The problem now is that the marriage, apparently not having been in a church, and I don’t know what else might be connected, somehow presents an impediment to the Catholic partner’s resuming the sacraments.

I don’t understand the details. That is why I am writing.

To be more clear: Is the idea that the Catholic partner, although not practicing at the time of the wedding, and therefore not caring who performed the ceremony, is thought of by the Catholic Church as not really being married, so then the Catholic partner is ‘living in sin,’ and that has to be rectified before they can begin with the sacraments again?

And the Jewish partner, who cares for their spouse, and wants to help, but doesn’t want to become Catholic, and wants no obligations from the Catholic Church. How do they help?

Thanks.

 

[XinMinny]

The Catholic must seek the advice of their pastor. He will be in the best position to help and start any paperwork for an annulment.

No need for an annulment here. The couple want to stay married. The wedding apparently was not in a church, or conducted by a priest. This was because neither party at the time of the wedding, wanted to be very spiritual, so they didn’t care.

Now, however, the Catholic partner wants to be spiritual, and apparently the beginning of the marriage presents some problem.

I am writing because the Jewish partner is a good friend of mine, and is a bit distressed. They want to help, but they are scared because the canon legal language involved seems harsh and perhaps accusative (if someone in that position is told they have to be married again, they think “you mean I’m not married…” and then the imagination takes over, etc). So, I am trying to understand so I can help with the problem.

Thank you again everyone.

 

[Seatuck]

The Catholic needs to go make an appointment with the pastor at the local church. He/She needs to start practicing the faith including going to Confession. The marriage needs to be brought into the Catholic church. They need to figure out about what religion they are going to raise the children in. Normally Catholics are obligated to raise their children Catholic. A Jewish wife/husband needs to process and understand that.
If they want to stay married then they will work out the differences.

 

[Matthew_Holford]

Hi. And, thanks for the help ahead of time. I have a friend of Jewish heritage whose spouse is of Catholic heritage. The Catholic would like to become re-involved in the church, and understands that some of the details about their marriage may prohibit the participation in the sacraments.

Neither has been very involved with their faith for many years, including when they were married (I don’t know the details of the wedding - church, priest, etc…). Now, the Catholic wants become more active again, and it seems the marriage is an impediment to the partaking of the sacraments.

So, the question is: How can the marriage be worked with to give the Catholic partner liberty to partake of the sacraments, if the Jewish partner has no interest in being part of the Catholic faith community?

Thanks.

Too little information to be able to answer your questions. The Catholic spouse needs to speak to a priest about the circumstances.

 

[puzzleannie]

To be more clear: Is the idea that the Catholic partner, although not practicing at the time of the wedding, and therefore not caring who performed the ceremony, is thought of by the Catholic Church as not really being married, so then the Catholic partner is ‘living in sin,’ and that has to be rectified before they can begin with the sacraments again?

yes that is an objective statement of the situation. As to the person’s actual state of sin, that is for him to discuss with the priest.

And the Jewish partner, who cares for their spouse, and wants to help, but doesn’t want to become Catholic, and wants no obligations from the Catholic Church. How do they help?

Thanks.

there is no requirement that the non-Catholic party become Catholic or incur any obligation, but he must be informed of the Catholic party’s obligations in the practice of her faith, including the requirement that she do all in her power to raise the children Catholic.

there is absolutely no way to make third hand accurate statements about anyone’s particular marriage situation. The remedy is for the Catholic party to visit the priest of his closest parish and find out what needs to be done in order for him to return to full communion with the Catholic church.

 

[EvelynEVF]

If your friend is feeling bad about “not being married,” you could just bring up the fact that in lots of countries, there is a civil wedding and a Church wedding, two distinctly separate rituals. The Church does not argue that your friends are not married civilly; a Catholic just needs the “Church wedding” too. They did the best they could with what they knew when they were not practising, and now it’s time to take care of what was missing.

 

[joanofarc2008]

Your friend should talk to the pastor. If there were no impediments then the easiest thing to do would be a convalidation assuming the Jewish spouse is willing to be married in the Catholic Church. This does not incur any obligation for the Jewish spouse to become Catholic or participate in the Catholic faith. However, if the Jewish spouse is not amenable to this then the Catholic spouse can possibly apply for radical sanitation. This is assuming there were no impediments which is why the Catholic spouse will need to speak to the pastor.