Inheritance and Dissapointments

[HouseArrest]

I’m all too familiar with inheritance hard feelings. Dad’s been dead 12 years and there are still hard feelings between my brothers over the will and what happened next.

My advice, never tell your dad what your aunt told you. If he brings up the topic of the will with you, you can always say “Did you ever give Grandpa a reason to think you didn’t need his money?” No need to say anything else.

If anything, I would say this, not saying that it came from the aunt.

It isn’t like it is a big mystery, however. I mean, the aunt did take care of him. The only thing I think is odd is that everyone else got an “in your face” amount of money. None would have been better. It is like giving a waitress pennies for a tip. It is meant to be an insult.

 

[EasterJoy]

If anything, I would say this, not saying that it came from the aunt.

It isn’t like it is a big mystery, however. I mean, the aunt did take care of him. The only thing I think is odd is that everyone else got an “in your face” amount of money. None would have been better. It is like giving a waitress pennies for a tip. It is meant to be an insult.

Asking his dad if he ever said anything to Grandpa to give him the idea that he didn’t need an inheritance is a not very subtle way of saying, “Stuff it, Dad. Aunt Sally deserved what she got and you deserved what you got. You brought this on yourself.” It might be absolutely true, especially if Dad ever totaled up the hours his sister spent on their dad, but that is not the point. That is not what you or the OP would mean, but that is almost certainly how it would sound.

There is zero good that is going to come from saying that. In fact, if Dad says, “I think Dad left us out of the will because I bragged about how much money I had and was never there for him the way Sally was,” I would say, “Dad, don’t punish yourself. You lost your dad and you lost what you hoped to have with him. That is enough loss to deal with. When you meet in the next life and you’re both saints, that will all fall away. For now, we love you. Just be here with us, we’ll pray for Grandpa.”