Intentionally withholding forgotten sins

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MrsMeganMc

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So I know the following “rules” about confession:
  1. Intentionally withholding mortal sins is a mortal sin in itself
  2. Unintentionally forgotten sins are still forgiven, but they should be mentioned at a future confession
What about a situation in which you had remembered a forgotten mortal sin (it is definitely mortal…), but have been purposefully not mentioning it in confession because you are embarrassed? Am I falling under “rule” 1 above?

Thank you!
 
MMM,

That rule number 1 is the obligation to confess all mortal sins of which you are aware that have not been previously confessed.

So. . . if you remember a mortal sin, and you are aware of it at the time you go to another confession. . . then yes, you aren’t fulfilling that obligation.

(that little caveat about “that you are aware of” is important not only for the mortal sins forgotten the first time, but sometimes it happens that one could remember a mortal sin, but forget it again before the next confession.)

What do you think? Any help?
VC
 
MMM,

That rule number 1 is the obligation to confess all mortal sins of which you are aware that have not been previously confessed.

So. . . if you remember a mortal sin, and you are aware of it at the time you go to another confession. . . then yes, you aren’t fulfilling that obligation.

(that little caveat about “that you are aware of” is important not only for the mortal sins forgotten the first time, but sometimes it happens that one could remember a mortal sin, but forget it again before the next confession.)

What do you think? Any help?
VC
VC,

Yes - that helps…I did not forget it again. It is just one of those sins that you really don’t want to have to say aloud cause it is really embarassing and I cannot believe that I allowed myself to commit it.

I just need to remember that the confessional is meant to be humbling :o

Looks like I need to hit up the confessional again! Good thing we have our advent penance service this weekend at church. 🙂

Thanks!
 
Thanks VC

Also wanted to say that your signature gave me a good chuckle 😃
 
MMM,

You know, I was thinking about it some more. I would bet that if you went to a priest and said “Father, I want to confess that I did X, and I was so embarrassed about it I withheld it from my last confession – which I also confess.” (Remember you should confess the “withholding” too) that the priest would be very grateful to you for the example of faith and humility, and be quite happy.

When you look at it like that, its not embarrassing that you are admitting to something you did wrong. It would be embarrassing to never admit it.

Think of those politicians on tv when they get accused of some wrongdoing. They deny it, deny it, deny it. Until they get caught red handed, and then they admit it. Sometimes I think the fact they refused to own up to their wrongdoing is a worse indicator of character than the actual original wrongdoing (which could have been done in the heat of the moment, etc).

It reminds me of when parents say to their children “I’m not happy that you did X, but what really makes me sad is you lied about it!”

What do you think about it? Can you get up the courage to go? I’ll say a prayer for you.
VC
 
Thanks VC

Also wanted to say that your signature gave me a good chuckle 😃
Thanks. Maybe I should change it though? I intended it to communicate that I am a sinner, and to remind me not to judge anyone.

But, sometimes I wonder if it conveys, unintentionally, the idea that if you find mistakes in my spelling that it is like finding the mote in your neighbors eye and the “it’s hard to type with this plank it my eye” is some sort of admonishment to remember your own plank :confused: 😊

How does it come across? (totally off topic, I know!)
VC
 
MMM,

You know, I was thinking about it some more. I would bet that if you went to a priest and said “Father, I want to confess that I did X, and I was so embarrassed about it I withheld it from my last confession – which I also confess.” (Remember you should confess the “withholding” too) that the priest would be very grateful to you for the example of faith and humility, and be quite happy.

When you look at it like that, its not embarrassing that you are admitting to something you did wrong. It would be embarrassing to never admit it.

Think of those politicians on tv when they get accused of some wrongdoing. They deny it, deny it, deny it. Until they get caught red handed, and then they admit it. Sometimes I think the fact they refused to own up to their wrongdoing is a worse indicator of character than the actual original wrongdoing (which could have been done in the heat of the moment, etc).

It reminds me of when parents say to their children “I’m not happy that you did X, but what really makes me sad is you lied about it!”

What do you think about it? Can you get up the courage to go? I’ll say a prayer for you.
VC
All very good advice. I WILL confess it this weekend…I have been through a number of very hard confessions since coming back to the church…and have a good relationship with my confessor.

Having this good relationship almost makes it worse because in my imperfect humanity I feel as though admitting these horrible sins will make him think less of me. Which when I truly reflect upon this - I see that it is silly to think that way - in fact it is the opposite!

Thanks for your prayer VC - God bless you!
 
Thanks. Maybe I should change it though? I intended it to communicate that I am a sinner, and to remind me not to judge anyone.

But, sometimes I wonder if it conveys, unintentionally, the idea that if you find mistakes in my spelling that it is like finding the mote in your neighbors eye and the “it’s hard to type with this plank it my eye” is some sort of admonishment to remember your own plank :confused: 😊

How does it come across? (totally off topic, I know!)
VC
I think it is funny and I took it the way you intended it - as it one of my favorite quotes to remember when I am tempted to judge others.

I did not take it as way to point out others flaws/planks.
 
i can totally appeciate how hard confessing it will be i had to do the same thing last week what was worse was that the priest is a personal friend which made it worse deep but i took a deep breath and confessed it and i felt so much better 😃
 
I don’t understand title of the thread
if you intentionally withheld sins in confession, that confession is invalid, as well as being itself a mortal sin of sacrilege, and both must be confessed at the earliest opportunity.

If you forgot a sin, that means you have no conscious recollection of it, so you can not “intentionally forget it”. All your sins are absolved including those you forgot to confess. There is no requirement to confess them when recalled, although it would no doubt be very beneficial for your peace of mind and spiritual well-being to do so, especially since the question comes up so frequently. Anything troubling your conscience should be confessed, and leave the judgement up to the priest, don’t try to be your own confessor.

What is even more common, I think, is that after years of confessing you come to realize, through study or correction of misinformation, that a past action was a real sin, that you must surely confess as soon as you become aware of it, even though, at the time, you did not realize (or admit) it was sinful. Again it was probably absolved in past confessions, but you need that assurance for your own spiritual health. I was taught as a child to end every confession with “for these (that I have just told) and all the sins of my past life I am heartily sorry.”
 
I don’t understand title of the thread
if you intentionally withheld sins in confession, that confession is invalid, as well as being itself a mortal sin of sacrilege, and both must be confessed at the earliest opportunity.

If you forgot a sin, that means you have no conscious recollection of it, so you can not “intentionally forget it”. All your sins are absolved including those you forgot to confess. There is no requirement to confess them when recalled, although it would no doubt be very beneficial for your peace of mind and spiritual well-being to do so, especially since the question comes up so frequently. Anything troubling your conscience should be confessed, and leave the judgement up to the priest, don’t try to be your own confessor.

What is even more common, I think, is that after years of confessing you come to realize, through study or correction of misinformation, that a past action was a real sin, that you must surely confess as soon as you become aware of it, even though, at the time, you did not realize (or admit) it was sinful. Again it was probably absolved in past confessions, but you need that assurance for your own spiritual health. I was taught as a child to end every confession with “for these (that I have just told) and all the sins of my past life I am heartily sorry.”
Let me explain.

I have recently come back to the church after many years away. When I gave my first confession while being back - I had forgotten that I commited this mortal sin.

A couple of weeks ago - I remebered committing this mortal sin.

I was just recently at confession again this past week and I did not mention this sin because it is kind of embarassing.

Like I said above - I know that if you unintentionally forget a sin while in confession - that the sin is absolved. But that you should mention it when you remember it at your next confession.

I guess the question becomes that if you withhold these remembered sins - which were absolved because you had forgotten them - is it still a sin of sacriledge?
 
Hi puzzleannie,
I don’t understand title of the thread
if you intentionally withheld sins in confession, that confession is invalid, as well as being itself a mortal sin of sacrilege, and both must be confessed at the earliest opportunity.
I think the title refers to the situation described later in the OP’s post: forgetting a mortal sin and hence not confessing it, recalling the mortal sin later, and then intentionally not confessing the once forgotten sin.
There is no requirement to confess them when recalled
I was under the impression that there was a requirement. The obligation stems from Divine law, but is also codified in Canon Law 988: The faithful are bound to confess, in kind and in number, all grave sins committed after baptism, of which after careful examination of conscience they are aware, which have not yet been directly pardoned by the keys of the Church, and which have not been confessed in an individual confession
We can find this principle in St. Thomas’ Summa, when he regarding forgotten mortal sins:. . .he is bound to confess the sin when he calls it to mind. (Supplement, 10, 5, reply obj. 3)
The same is found in the Catechism of the Council of Trent, discussing forgotten sins:But should the confession seem defective, either because the penitent forgot some grievous sins, or because, although intent on confessing all his sins, he did not examine the recesses of his conscience with sufficient accuracy, he is not bound to repeat his confession. It will be sufficient, when he recollects the sins which he had forgotten, to confess them to a priest on a future occasion.
Here is the Catholic Encyclopedia on the topic:If, however, the sin be omitted, not through any fault of the penitent, but through forgetfulness, it is forgiven indirectly; but it must be declared at the next confession and thus submitted to the power of the keys.
As you point out, however, there may be some pastoral qualifications, especially if one were prone to scrupulosity. In general, I would note that the obligation is to confess what you actually recall, not an obligation to recall everything. In other words, one does not have to incessantly strive to recall anything forgotten, to the point of obsession. It is assumed that a good examination of conscience is sufficient. But, if one does happen to recall a mortal sin at some point, it would seem one is bound to confess it. So, at that point “intentionally withholding a (once) forgotten mortal sin” would be wrong.

Any thoughts? Am I under a false impression that one is obligated to confess forgotten mortal sins if remembered?

Thank you!
VC
 
I think I understand what you’re saying, that you have blocked out the memory of your past sinfulness, but now it’s starting to come back with a vengence, and even though they were forgiven through another confession in which you tried to confess everything, but just didn’t remember it at that time… I am in the process of doing the same thing myself. Before I started taking my faith seriously, I most certaintly was NOT an angel (still not), and there were many embarassing things in my life that I have blocked out, almost completely. Almost being the key word. I recently started remembering about 3 years of commiting moral sins multiple times a day. They had already been forgiven, but recently I confessed what I have remebered so far. My confessor knows that I’ve not always tried to be faithful, and before I started the whole confession, I told him that I was starting to remember alot of the stupid, sinful things that I’ve done. I had quite a few whoppers in there that I would not have even been able to say if I hadn’t written it down first. Maybe that would help you in confessing it.

As my memory is coming back in bits and pieces, I’m sure I’ll have many more confessions of these types, with probably even more embarrassing sins. I look at it this way, though, being a psychology major… when traumatic things happen to people (and sinning can be traumatic) the mind protects itself by blocking out the memory. A good sign of healing is the mind releasing those memories again. It means that one is in a “safe place” to process and deal with those memories. Doesn’t mean that it’s easy (oh boy, is it hard!), but I know for me, confessing those sins even though I have already been forgiven for them, is one more step in my own healing process.

I will be praying for you, and God Bless!
Ericka
 
Hi puzzleannie,

I read through the article you provided but I didn’t see it address the specific question of whether or not you are obligated to confess sins you had once forgotten but now recall. But I may have missed it.

I told MrsMegan that I thought there was a requirement to confess those sins. It sounded like you said there wasn’t a requirement. Am I missing something? I don’t want to steer anyone wrong or give any misinformation.

Thanks for the help,
VC
 
For those following along in this thread:

I wanted to add what the Baltimore Catechism(s) have referenced in regard to forgotten mortal sins and the requirement to confess them when recalled.

Baltimore Catechism #4, Session 17, Q. 191:
If you should forget a mortal sin in confession and remember it the same day or evening, or while you are still in the church, it will not be necessary to wait and go to confession again. It is forgiven already, because it was included in your forgotten sins; but you must tell it the next time you go to confession, saying before your regular confession: In my last confession I forgot this sin. (emphasis added)
and Baltimore Catechism #1 (revised edition), Session 32, Q. 428:
  1. After telling the time of our last confession, what do we confess?
After telling the time of our last confession, if we have committed any mortal sins since that time we must confess them, and also any that we have forgotten in previous confessions, telling the nature and number of each; we may also confess any venial sins we wish to mention. (emphasis added)
VC

P.S. puzzleannie*, *please let us know if we are missing something here. There seems to be a conflict between the above and your statement that there is no requirement to confess them when recalled. Can you clear that up for us? Maybe you were thinking about something else, or maybe I misunderstood what you were getting at? Or maybe I am misunderstanding and misapplying the texts that I’ve quoted from?
Thank you for the help!

VC
 
Confession is meant to be humbling not humiliating… there is a difference.

I had a well-meaning priest in my parish whose response to hearing sins was: “Well, what did you do that for?” Needless to say I didn’t go to confess to him anymore.
Find a compassionate, non-judgmental individual. Ask the Holy Spirit to speak for you. Take a deep breath and dive into the Confessional. :)
 
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