Intercourse Etiquette Question

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RachelKH said:
um…is there generally a lot of ‘mess’??? My dh insists on thoroughly cleaning himself up with tissues, so I do too, and the sheets too if it’s come out. I always wondered if this was normal practice or a hangup of my dh’s. (another example of how he would rather just ‘look’ than actually ‘do’)
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Sounds a little too fastidious to me… accepting that sex is messy and not freaking out over that is part of maturity IMO. Besides the fact that I would feel fairly insulted if my husband found the results of making love to me so repulsive that he has to immediately clean me off of him! I dunno… maybe we’re the wierd ones, because we usually just fall asleep and shower in the morning. 🤷

Tissues? Don’t they fall apart into a billion little bits?

And to answer your question, no there usually isn’t…
 
yes, it does feel as if he looks down on me for causing his precious to get all messy.
 
RachelKH said:
yes, it does feel as if he looks down on me for causing his precious to get all messy.
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You really should tell him that. Gently, lovingly, but tell him. Your marital sex life should be all about 100% acceptance and love and giving. He’s most likely not meaning to hurt you… he’s probably never thought of it that way. But he needs to know that he’s sucking some of the joy out of lovemaking for you by behaving that way. :o

You could offer to make love in the shower or bath. Then it all gets rinsed off anyway. 😃

But he should meet you halfway, too. You know, many times my DH will have to go to the bathroom soon after. If he feels like he MUST clean off, he could do it privately and without displaying it. After you get a little snuggle time…
 
As far as the laundry point goes, I see your point. The usual practice with my family is to throw our own sheets and towels into the washer before leaving, just to help out whoever we’re staying with. In this case, we had my parents washing their sheets and towels before us (the washer wasn’t large enough to do a “double load”), so I wasn’t sure there would be time for their load to finish before starting mine… and, yes, I do get embarrassed when evidence of lovemaking is left on the sheets and someone else may see them. Just one of my little quirks.

My husband and I have made love many times in my parents’ and his parents’ homes while staying there and I haven’t been uncomfortable. Something about being at his brothers’ house just made things a little less comfortable… aside from the crazy echo and thin walls.

As for making love somewhere else, I’m completely for using the shower. And maybe it’s just us, but lovemaking seems really messy for us…🤷 like, to the point that I’m uncomfortable sleeping in the sheets afterwards because of the mess. Just an afterthought.
 
What in the world did I walk into?! :bigyikes:

It’s a guy thing. Ladies, get over yourselves and let it go. Parents (yours and his) or any other family members already know what happened if there are kids in your photos. Saying you don’t want someone to hear you really isn’t a good reason when it’s rationally thought out. Anyone can be quiet when they really want to. The floor is just fine. Lay out a couple of blankets if the floor doesn’t have carpet. I’ve found that those mouthguards that they make for football players and wrestlers work great for controlling voices. It’s better than biting your tongue. Bury your face in the pillow if nothing else works! :choocho:

Checklist:
  1. Towel, 1 each if necessary (baby wipes work)
  2. Air freshener or candle (open the window if you can)
  3. Turn on the music or TV to something inconspicuous
  4. No marathons allowed
Chances are your husband won’t last anyways… 😃 Enjoy!
 
2 towels and air freshener?

Guess we have been doing something wrong all these years 😛
 
Newlywed here who stayed at my parent’s house, and then his parent’s house for a few days after our honeymoon before we were able to move into our apartment. We made love in both places. 😛 Both times we made sure to be very quiet, and laid a small towel down underneath us. It was just fine! 😃
I would say if you know you can be reasonably quiet (aka no noisy bed springs or screaming) and you’re not going to leave a mess for someone else to clean up after, go for it! But, on the flip side, you have to respect your spouse. If they’re uncomfortable with it, then drop the idea. They probably wouldn’t enjoy it anyway if they’re too stressed about it. 🤷

As for mouth-guards so you don’t make noise… :rotfl:
 
Yeah I was like :ehh: at the mouth guards too. I was thinking, “Whoa, how rambunctious do these people get?!”
 
kage_ar said:
2 towels and air freshener?

Guess we have been doing something wrong all these years 😛
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I don’t know about the air freshener, but we started using towels after we had an early Sat. morning before the kids got up;) Got dressed, came downstairs, kids got up, running around. Oldest daughter came down with a puzzled look on her face and said, “why’s your bed wet?”:confused: DUH…deer caught in headlight look from me “Maybe Daddy left his wet towel on the bed after he got his shower… and why were you in our room anyway…um, stay off our bed…um…where’s your father?”
 
There’s like 0 guys responding to this thread , but over 600 views. I feel like I have to go to confession now :eek:. Next time go for a drive and get a van.
 
StJoan_ismygal said:
Yeah I was like :ehh: at the mouth guards too. I was thinking, “Whoa, how rambunctious do these people get?!”
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I knew that would get a reaction. 😛 My wife wasn’t too thrilled with me when I brought it up at the time. I already had one for me for my workouts. I don’t know if anyone else out there has a problem with stiff necks, but this can alleviate that during “strenuous activity”. She dropped the matter when she realized it worked. It was a one time incident, but hey, whatever works, right? :cool:

Then again, my FIL actually told my wife to stop breastfeeding when our youngest was 14 months old because, “give them back to your husband already.” It helps to know where the family stands on the topic. :whistle:
 
happymommy said:
I don’t know about the air freshener, but we started using towels after we had an early Sat. morning before the kids got up;) Got dressed, came downstairs, kids got up, running around. Oldest daughter came down with a puzzled look on her face and said, “why’s your bed wet?”:confused: DUH…deer caught in headlight look from me “Maybe Daddy left his wet towel on the bed after he got his shower… and why were you in our room anyway…um, stay off our bed…um…where’s your father?”
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:rotfl:

*Stop, this thread is making me laugh so hard today! *
 
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