Interfaith Marriage

[Vanessa1]

Hello everyone, I need some advice on what to do. Here goes my situation. I’m a catholic, i have not completed all the Sacraments but am enrolling in classes in september to complete my first communion and confirmation. My fiancee has not been baptized in any religion and does not share my catholic faith, as he is agnostic. We have talked about this in length. We are planning to get married this November and I wanted to have the ceremony at my church. I spoke with the sister/nun and she stated the classes will be completed in time. However, she indicated he had to be baptized and join the classes with me and become catholic.Is this right? I understood that their is a way to have interfaith marriages with the permission of the bishop.He is in the military and will be away from may to october. I would really want to get married in my church but I’m not sure what i should do.We are very much in love and he has agreed to marry me in my church but he does not want to be a catholic because its a requirement. Could you give me your opinions in this matter.

vanessa

 

[1ke]

No, your fiance does not have to convert to the Catholic Church in order for you to be married in the Church.

You need to talk to the priest who will perform the marriage, not anyone else. There is required marriage preparation, so if you plan to be married in November, you need to make an appointment with the priest now.

Regarding interfaith marriage in general-- this is a very difficult thing to undertake. You, as a Catholic, will make a promise to raise your children in the Catholic faith. How will your agnostic husband feel about this? What problems might this cause in the upbringing of children? How will you reconcile your different beliefs as you raise children.

Have the wedding is the easy part. Being married to someone who does not share your faith will be extremely difficult.

 

[SFTor]

Isn’t there room for a little tolerance here? Or do you really believe that two people who truly love each other can’t find a way to work it out and be happy together?

As for the kids: give them a broad education in world religions, and let them choose for themselves whether they want to join the Catholic Church, or any religion for that matter, when they are of age and can choose for themselves.

That seems to be in the spirit of truth and broadmindedness.

 

[quacker66]

For a Catholic church wedding, the noncatholic must promise to raise the children Catholic, must go through the wedding preparation course, and can’t be living together for 6 months (or six weeks) before the wedding.

I’m Catholic and married a Jewish man. I’m now divorced, but not because of the faith issue. He was Jewish in culture, not religion, and attended Jewish weddings, funerals, bar and bat mitvahs, etc.

However, I can tell you this. It’s very hard. What I missed most during my marriage was that my husband couldn’t enjoy the Catholic holidays, like Christmas and Easter the way I did and the children missed that too. We put up a Christmas tree and he even went to Midnight Mass with me. But he didn’t have the same enthusiasm and happiness that comes with being brought up in it, with all the memories and traditions. For this reason, if I had it to do over again, I would have waited until I found a Catholic man whose faith meant as much to him as it did me. It makes such a tremendous difference.

One other item: Statistically speaking, children that are brought up in homes where the father is practicing his faith, the children will go on through the teen years and adult life in the faith, regardless of how religious the mother is.

Somethings to think about.

 

[Seatuck]

Isn’t there room for a little tolerance here? Or do you really believe that two people who truly love each other can’t find a way to work it out and be happy together?

As for the kids: give them a broad education in world religions, and let them choose for themselves whether they want to join the Catholic Church, or any religion for that matter, when they are of age and can choose for themselves.

That seems to be in the spirit of truth and broadmindedness.

In the Catholic world we believe that the primary purpose of marriage is to procreate children and raise them Catholic. The close secondary purpose is for the mutual support of the spouses including spiritual help to get each other into heaven. We believe that the husband has the role of spiritual leader of the house. We don’t beleive in the pick and choose option. That isn’t a part of our makeup.

Do you see the problem we are facing when we enter into marriage with someone who does not share the catholic faith from the get go? Those are some pretty big deficits.

The Church does allow marriage to those in other faiths but we are to make sure we have the resources we need to bolster our Catholic faith.

 

[Lil_Cat]

For a Catholic church wedding, the noncatholic must promise to raise the children Catholic, must go through the wedding preparation course, and can’t be living together for 6 months (or six weeks) before the wedding.

No. The non-Catholic is informed that the Catholic is required to raise the children Catholic. There’s a huge difference there.