A person that should be able to do with their bandwidth whatever they want.
You may want that to be the way things are, but that does not make them so. You are not the one in control. The owner of the service is. That is why they are the ‘owner’. They created and own the service, and they get to say what terms you must agree to. Not complying with their terms is stealing.
I pay the ISP for 8mbps of bandwith.
What you say is true, but not complete. You pay your ISP for ‘up to’ 8 mpbs, and
only for the 8mpbs that your household uses. Its kind of like going to an “all you can eat” buffet. You are not really buying all the food that you CAN eat. You are buying the food that you do eat. If you say, 'well, I could eat more, but I don’t want to, so my kids are going to eat the rest of what I could eat", that would be stealing. For your internet service, the provider sells you only the bandwidth that your household uses. Not the bandwidth that others outside your household can use.
So why shouldn’t I be able to divide the that bandwidth however i choose?
Simply because the owner has not given you the right to do so. If you check your ‘license’ agreement, you will see that ownership of the bandwidth is not transferred to you, to do as you wish. You only have a license to use it, per their terms. This is why it is called a ‘license’ agreement, not a purchase agreement. When you purchase bandwidth, or service, only then do you own it, and are able to do what you want with it.
Is it wrong for me to allow my wife to use the bandwidth while I am also using the internet?
INo, because this complies with your legal agreement with the ISP. Wives are universilly considered to be part of your household.
Is it wrong for a coffee shop to allow their patrons to connect?
No, assuming a valid license exists. But why do you think coffee shops pay a lot more for their service thatn you or I? Because that is how the owners choose to sell it.
The patrons didn’t pay the ISP?
No, but the coffee shop entered into a license agreement with the ISP that allows them to offer the connection to their patrons.
I agree you shouldn’t assume your neighbor would consent. It does harm your neighboor by reducing the amount of bandwidth they have available. Most people have plenty to spare, but you don’t know that to be the case.
So if they neighboor agrees I don’'t see a problem with it.
No, there is a problem with it, it is stealing. Your neighbor does not own the service. The ISP retains owernship and therefore has the rights to specify how it is used. That is the definition of a license versus a purchase.
Dan