Introvert in need of advice

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Would that be Allentown, PA? I haven’t been there (although I loved the Billy Joel song), but I have been to Harrisburg and Lebanon, PA, near Hershey. I have lived almost entirely out west.

I just past the 40 year old mark a few years ago, and that seems to be the cutoff for most religious communities. I don’t know of any that take people beyond that. I did see a Franciscan site where a man joined them at age 45, so I guess it’s possible. I too am discerning. I am a very contemplative person, and pray daily. I carry two rosaries with me always (one wooden one, and the other is a pocket “auto” rosary with one decade–and even use them!), and wear my San Damiano crucifix. I have worked the better part of this past year at a Catholic shrine and have learned so much about the Church in that time. I sometimes feel I’m being called to something deeper. I have had to forgive myself for my sinful past, and it’s been a long journey. But I’ve learned that all of our struggles and dark times are usually in preparation for deeper faith and more understanding of God. I would consider priesthood, and will continue to discern that for the next while. We’ll see where it leads.

:gopray2: Peace
 
I’ve basically spent over 10 years of my life burying that nagging feeling in the back of my head because I am introverted (and for other reasons). I really don’t feel I am good enough to be a priest. Priests (especially when they become bishops) need to be effective and talented communicators, and it is people who are gifted in that way who should pursue vocations.
 
aksolitude said:
Would that be Allentown, PA? I haven’t been there (although I loved the Billy Joel song), but I have been to Harrisburg and Lebanon, PA, near Hershey. I have lived almost entirely out west.

I just past the 40 year old mark a few years ago, and that seems to be the cutoff for most religious communities. I don’t know of any that take people beyond that. I did see a Franciscan site where a man joined them at age 45, so I guess it’s possible. I too am discerning. I am a very contemplative person, and pray daily. I carry two rosaries with me always (one wooden one, and the other is a pocket “auto” rosary with one decade–and even use them!), and wear my San Damiano crucifix. I have worked the better part of this past year at a Catholic shrine and have learned so much about the Church in that time. I sometimes feel I’m being called to something deeper. I have had to forgive myself for my sinful past, and it’s been a long journey. But I’ve learned that all of our struggles and dark times are usually in preparation for deeper faith and more understanding of God. I would consider priesthood, and will continue to discern that for the next while. We’ll see where it leads.

:gopray2: Peace
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Yes, Allentown PA. Not the best city but the diocese is good. I think alot of communities take people up to 45. There are a few that will take even later depending of circumstances.
 
gjpayne said:
I’ve basically spent over 10 years of my life burying that nagging feeling in the back of my head because I am introverted (and for other reasons). I really don’t feel I am good enough to be a priest. Priests (especially when they become bishops) need to be effective and talented communicators, and it is people who are gifted in that way who should pursue vocations.
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The priest at my parish told me that no one is worthy of being a priest, when you think about it, who really is? Nobody. I know of a lot of introverted priests who aren’t the greatest communicators, but they are holy and have a sincere faith. I think the worst is when the priest goes through the motions and/or starts ad-libbing which shows a lack of reverence. I have seen both from religious priests and its disheartening.
 
I guess when I say “talented communicator” I am referring to someone who can do a great job of explaining the last encyclical or something along those lines. Someone who can relate difficultly worded material to the “regular folks” and can translate it into language they can understand. Someone who also can recite the text of the Holy Mass (word for word) in a way that is meaningful for the congregation.

A priest who just wings it or does his own thing, or makes up his own Mass really isn’t doing that, nor does it demonstrate the kind of talent I am trying to describe.

All I know is that I don’t have that ability.
 
****Know of a priest that is an extreme introvert. The parish setting has not been a good place for him,but he has served a great number of years amid difficulties with this. Most of the people that meet him, say how much better it would have been if he had been a monk.He spends more time in prayer than any priest I have ever known-which is a great thing, but his shyness makes folks think that he does not care about them. A parish priest these days is usually alone and has to handle everthing. In the old days, you could have a quiet associate priest with the pastor and that was OK. Now a days, the pastor has to have an outgoing mind set and good social skills to survive.
 
plato3 said:
Now a days, the pastor has to have an outgoing mind set and good social skills to survive.
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Not always true.

I know of introverts who are great pastors and love it.

It is very hard to generalize in this way.

The only thing that we can say is that introverts have issues to deal with that extroverts do not but then extroverts also have issues to deal with that introverts do not.
 
gjpayne said:
I’ve basically spent over 10 years of my life burying that nagging feeling in the back of my head because I am introverted (and for other reasons).
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Have you considered the religious life as a brother?

:blessyou:
 
I have to tell you that I too a very introvert and shy person. I often screw up my relationships with others because of my trait. I often feel very uncomfortable being around so many people. And i right now, after quite a journey of discernment, can tell you that i’m called to become a diocese priest. I’ve discerned a lot of communities and it often end with overwhelm and relieve when i’m able to back home . Because when you live in a community, you should live with so many people in your daily life in a personal basic and it often conflict with your trait of an introvert(being alone). A diocese priest in the other hand have a great deal of time alone which is ideal for introvert and he never have to expose with so many people in this personal life.
 
As for the post by mantis regarding religious communities, there are those that allow for more individual time - so to speak - especially if you look into contemplative communities. While I feel called to the religious life and feel a community of love in Christ is what God intends for me, I am someone who can be very jealous of my silent time with God - when I’m not too busy being a foolish sinner and messing up things…

That said, look into all the options, leave no stone unturned (that goes for everyone). We all have at least one place in the Church (as a layperson or as clergy/religious) that will allow us to carry out God’s Will for us efficaciously and without causing us any person issues. 🙂

In Hope and with prayers for your discernment.
Stephen
 
Our diocese doesn’t have any brothers that I am aware of. Our religious communities are the Poor Clares (PCPAs) in Saginaw, and the Religious Sisters of Mercy in Alma.

The closest thing would be the Capuchins in the neighboring Archdiocese of Detroit. I am the sort of person who gets physically ill at the thought of a job interview in a place 200 miles away like Fort Wayne. I like it here, and I like being near my family.

On top of that, our diocese is one of those that desperately needs diocesean priests, to the point that we are importing them from Colombia and Vietnam and all sorts of places. It is completely against my wiring to go someplace else when there is such a severe need here in the place where I would rather live.
 
What do you mean by importing priest? I can’t believe what you said. The need is real huh?
 
I recall reading somewhere that about 1/3 of all diocesean priests in the USA are born outside of the USA. So it isn’t a completely overnight phenomenon. Perhaps not where you live.

I’m not saying it is a bad thing. I think, in a way, it can be a good thing. It also highlights the shortage that exists in this day and age.
 
I didn’t say it’s bad either. It only show that the real need of priest is still existing nowaday. Such need is an encouragement for us in our way of finding God’s call.
 
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