invalid confession?

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My sister has a friend who mentioned to her that when she goes to confession, she has a drink before she goes because of nerves. My sister told her she might be making an invalid confession. This led to hurt feelings as well as a serious question… if one were to be buzzed or drunk would the confession be valid? What about anxiety medication for nerves? would taking anything to relax the senses be sacreligious? I dont know how to answer this one!
 
coda said:
My sister has a friend who mentioned to her that when she goes to confession, she has a drink before she goes because of nerves. My sister told her she might be making an invalid confession. This led to hurt feelings as well as a serious question…
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Your sister is not qualified to make such a statement, and should keep such opinions to herself. This would be a matter the penitent should discuss with a priest.
coda said:
if one were to be buzzed or drunk would the confession be valid? What about anxiety medication for nerves? would taking anything to relax the senses be sacreligious?
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Drunk is not the same as having one drink, nor is it analogous to anti-anxiety medication.

A person going drunk to the confessional would probably not be capable of making a good confession-- but again… this should be discussed with a priest.
coda said:
I dont know how to answer this one!
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Here are the requirements for a penitent:

Can. 959 In the sacrament of penance the faithful who confess their sins to a legitimate minister, are sorry for them, and intend to reform themselves obtain from God through the absolution imparted by the same minister forgiveness for the sins they have committed after baptism and, at the same, time are reconciled with the Church which they have wounded by sinning.

Can. 987 To receive the salvific remedy of the sacrament of penance, a member of the Christian faithful must be disposed in such a way that, rejecting sins committed and having a purpose of amendment, the person is turned back to God.

Can. 988 §1. A member of the Christian faithful is obliged to confess in kind and number all grave sins committed after baptism and not yet remitted directly through the keys of the Church nor acknowledged in individual confession, of which the person has knowledge after diligent examination of conscience.

§2. It is recommended to the Christian faithful that they also confess venial sins.

Can. 989 After having reached the age of discretion, each member of the faithful is ob-liged to confess faithfully his or her grave sins at least once a year.

Can. 990 No one is prohibited from confessing through an interpreter as long as abuses and scandals are avoided and without prejudice to the prescript of ⇒ can. 983, §2.

Can. 991 Every member of the Christian faithful is free to confess sins to a legitimately approved confessor of his or her choice, even to one of another rite.
 
1ke said:
Your sister is not qualified to make such a statement, and should keep such opinions to herself. This would be a matter the penitent should discuss with a priest.

Drunk is not the same as having one drink, nor is it analogous to anti-anxiety medication.

A person going drunk to the confessional would probably not be capable of making a good confession-- but again… this should be discussed with a priest.

Here are the requirements for a penitent:

Can. 959 In the sacrament of penance the faithful who confess their sins to a legitimate minister, are sorry for them, and intend to reform themselves obtain from God through the absolution imparted by the same minister forgiveness for the sins they have committed after baptism and, at the same, time are reconciled with the Church which they have wounded by sinning.

Can. 987 To receive the salvific remedy of the sacrament of penance, a member of the Christian faithful must be disposed in such a way that, rejecting sins committed and having a purpose of amendment, the person is turned back to God.

Can. 988 §1. A member of the Christian faithful is obliged to confess in kind and number all grave sins committed after baptism and not yet remitted directly through the keys of the Church nor acknowledged in individual confession, of which the person has knowledge after diligent examination of conscience.

§2. It is recommended to the Christian faithful that they also confess venial sins.

Can. 989 After having reached the age of discretion, each member of the faithful is ob-liged to confess faithfully his or her grave sins at least once a year.

Can. 990 No one is prohibited from confessing through an interpreter as long as abuses and scandals are avoided and without prejudice to the prescript of ⇒ can. 983, §2.

Can. 991 Every member of the Christian faithful is free to confess sins to a legitimately approved confessor of his or her choice, even to one of another rite.
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She is certainly more than qualified to say “might”.This was her friend who brought the subject up to her. She has EVERY right to an opinion ,and DID recommend her friend talk to her priest.
and yes, alcohol and anti -anxiety meds are very analogous when it comes to taking either one to relieve oneself of nervousness over confession. Maybe someone can reply on a pastoral or theological level… thanks
 
coda said:
She is certainly more than qualified to say “might”.This was her friend who brought the subject up to her. She has EVERY right to an opinion ,and DID recommend her friend talk to her priest.
and yes, alcohol and anti -anxiety meds are very analogous when it comes to taking either one to relieve oneself of nervousness over confession. Maybe someone can reply on a pastoral or theological level… thanks
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hi coda;

seeing that having one drink is not sinful, nor taking anxiety meds, it should not impede a true confession. I for one, am a bit of a light weight when it comes to drinking, so even a glass of wine, makes me not quite as ‘sober’ in my memory, etc. I find myself to be tired, etc…I mean, if this is not a problem for your sister’s friend, then making a good confession and act of contrition would be fine, after having one drink. We are not speaking about being drunk–for that is a sin–and would be sort of a moot point to go to confession in that state. But, I think having a small glass of wine to calm one’s nerves before confession, as long as it doesn’t impede the confession, shouldn’t be a problem. Again…asking a priest would be the best idea, but that is my best ‘educated’ guess.
 
While, as has been said before, having ONE drink wouldn’t normally be an impediment at all, I would tell her, as an anxious penitent myself, that it might be better to feel the anxiety and offer it up as part of her penance.

If her anxiety prevents her confessing properly then the remedy may be to write a list of her sins beforehand (use a code, say one or two letters standing for each sin, if she’s worried about anyone else reading it).
 
coda said:
My sister has a friend who mentioned to her that when she goes to confession, she has a drink before she goes because of nerves. My sister told her she might be making an invalid confession. This led to hurt feelings as well as a serious question… if one were to be buzzed or drunk would the confession be valid? What about anxiety medication for nerves? would taking anything to relax the senses be sacreligious? I dont know how to answer this one!
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What about someone who has a cigarette before confession?? Shall we go on??? teachccd:confused:
 
I tend to think that the person in need of a drink before going to confession might need some catechizing on the sacrament. Perhaps I’m an odd duck, but I really look forward to the opportunity to bring my sins to Christ and get square with the Lord. It’s not a time of punishment to fear, but a time of healing to rejoice.

To answer the question though, I doubt one drink would ordinarily impair someone from being lucid enough to make a good confession, though everyone is different in that regard. I might also suggest instead of taking a drink, to pray before the tabernacle or spend some time in the adoration chapel before going to confession. Give Christ a chance to soothe your nerves before you turn to Jack Daniels.
 
LilyM said:
While, as has been said before, having ONE drink wouldn’t normally be an impediment at all, I would tell her, as an anxious penitent myself, that it might be better to feel the anxiety and offer it up as part of her penance.

If her anxiety prevents her confessing properly then the remedy may be to write a list of her sins beforehand (use a code, say one or two letters standing for each sin, if she’s worried about anyone else reading it).
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That was very well put…I remember even crying in some past confessions…and it was good, actually. The priest is there to sometimes comfort us, too, and in one particular confession where I cried, I think it was somewhat due to being anxious from not going for a few years, and not knowing what might be said. The priest was so calming, and comforting–and told me that sometimes we get anxious and overwhelmed coming before the Lord with our sins, and to take my time.

This is great advice, Lily.🙂
 
These are just my thoughts: she should probably be praying to Jesus to calm her nerves before confession and to bless her & her confessor. If you “need” the drink, whether you are drunk or not, then you are relying on a chemical substance instead of trusting Jesus with your problems, worries & anxieties.

I hope this doesn’t sound judgmental–I used to have a drink quite a lot. Sometimes I still drink to calm my nerves (even if it is just one glass of wine) & if I feel like if I am drinking for reasons other than for pleasure/entertainment then it is sinful.
 
whatevergirl said:
That was very well put…I remember even crying in some past confessions…and it was good, actually. The priest is there to sometimes comfort us, too, and in one particular confession where I cried, I think it was somewhat due to being anxious from not going for a few years, and not knowing what might be said. The priest was so calming, and comforting–and told me that sometimes we get anxious and overwhelmed coming before the Lord with our sins, and to take my time.

This is great advice, Lily.🙂
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Two of the local parishes here stock boxes of tissues in their confessionals, so it would seem plenty of people get teary during confession.
 
turtle18 said:
These are just my thoughts: she should probably be praying to Jesus to calm her nerves before confession and to bless her & her confessor. If you “need” the drink, whether you are drunk or not, then you are relying on a chemical substance instead of trusting Jesus with your problems, worries & anxieties.

I hope this doesn’t sound judgmental–I used to have a drink quite a lot. Sometimes I still drink to calm my nerves (even if it is just one glass of wine) & if I feel like if I am drinking for reasons other than for pleasure/entertainment then it is sinful.
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I don’t think so - ever heard the phrase ‘a medicinal brandy’? Alcohol HAS some of the properties of a medication, and was used for centuries as such in the absence of our more modern medicines.

And St Paul is on record advising Timothy to have a little wine for the sake of his health. Sounds like that’s exactly what you’re doing, albeit for your mental health rather than physical. If it’s just one glass and you’re not impaired by it, then enjoy.
 
LilyM said:
Two of the local parishes here stock boxes of tissues in their confessionals, so it would seem plenty of people get teary during confession.
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I remember telling the priest I was sorry for crying…and he made me laugh saying…that’s not a sin. No need to ask for forgiveness for crying. ha 🙂
 
I would say as long as she is still able to make a good confession and be aware of what she is discussing. The worry is that she may get into the habit of using alcohol to medicate anxiety in any situations and what can seem as a simple drink becomes more and more.
Ultimately I would say she should try to think of another way to relax because to be honest, you are confessing to Jesus and heaven rejoices at each good confession made. The confession should be a place of faith hope and love!
 
coda said:
She is certainly more than qualified to say “might”.This was her friend who brought the subject up to her. She has EVERY right to an opinion ,and DID recommend her friend talk to her priest.
and yes, alcohol and anti -anxiety meds are very analogous when it comes to taking either one to relieve oneself of nervousness over confession. Maybe someone can reply on a pastoral or theological level… thanks
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The proper pastoral or theological counsel can be obtained from the confessor of your sister’s friend. The friend should do the asking for that counsel. Your sister suggested that to her friend. Fine. Your sister is also qualified to say “My opinion about this matter is totally irrelevant but if YOU have concerns, talk to your priest.”

To suggest to another that he/she might be making invalid confessions is going way too far.
 
I’m kind of the opposite of your friend.

Since I also find it difficult to confess, I usually give the priest several drinks beforehand. That way, he’s a little more prepared for the barrage of evil that I am about to throw at him.
 
anonon,
what is this site about that you mention? it is not the sacrament of confession. i don’t know if you should be offering it.
 
cat123 said:
anonon,
what is this site about that you mention? it is not the sacrament of confession. i don’t know if you should be offering it.
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To put it simply, consider the source.This poster signed in TODAY, registered his religion as Not Applicable and then posted the identical post sixteen times this morning. His agenda is crystal clear, isn’t it?Any other questions?
 
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