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whatevergirl
Guest
good question–if it includes all of that, that would be more than reasonable…
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1ke
Guest
This has been discussed a number of times on this board.
You will find everything from free to $2K depending on where you live and the parish policies.
It’s in the range of what most people I know have paid. Others will disagree. This topic always causes much debate and disagreement on the board.
And, you are not paying for the Sacrament. You are paying for the private use of the facilities.
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1ke
Guest
They are not paying for the Sacrament, they are paying for the private use of the facilities-- and possibly for the marriage preparation sessions or other associated items.
They can stand up and exchange their vows during a regular Sunday mass, or in the chapel with the priest and two witnessees on a weekday, for free.
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puzzleannie
Guest
we have this thread about once a month, you might want to check out past threads on the topic since there is a lot of anecdotal evidence about relative charges and associated costs. using the church for a wedding or quincenera in our parish (2 hours) is $250 and barely covers A/C and overhead. we sure don’t make money, we are just trying to recoup some of the cost.
what is the overall pricetag on your wedding? there is no need to pay anything at all if you exchange vows before or after one of the Saturday evening Masses, for instance.
what is the overall pricetag on your wedding? there is no need to pay anything at all if you exchange vows before or after one of the Saturday evening Masses, for instance.
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estesbob
Guest
Are you a parishioner.? Our church is the very picturesque church in a mountain town. We are inundated with wedding requests in the spring and early summer and if you’re not a parishioner it costs you $1500 to use the Church
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CatholicSam
Guest
The church should be open for visitors to the tabernacle from 9-5 at least. The family is welcome to come during those hours to plan flowers, etc. It seems to me that various areas of the country have differing customs with regards to this. I am so happy that I live in one where our church doesn’t make a profit from weddings
I understand the argument, “Well, you pay thousands on the reception, so $700 to the parish isn’t bad.” That’s a very wealth-oriented view and I can imagine that among the more upper-class parishes outrageous stipends like this would be the norm. I’m happy to live in an area with more down-to-earth standards of living
It’s like those parishes charge that much just because they can get away with it! 
And I don’t think anyone is saying it should be absolutely free unless expense truly is an issue. But the OP said the $700 is just for the priviledge of marrying inside the parish church, not counting gift to priest, cantor, organist, etc. etc. etc. and is definitely unreasonable in my opinion. :nope:
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Truly_Beloved
Guest
Maybe I’m totally naive (it wouldn’t be the first timeI am so happy that I live in one where our church doesn’t make a profit from weddings
), but I don’t think any parish actually does profit from any Sacrament. I can’t speak for any other parish than my own, but when you have a really large parish family and only like 30% of registered parishioners contribute time/talent/treasure to the church, it’s very difficult to offer free services to everyone. One third of the family can’t do all the work while the other two thirds enjoy the fruits.I think elaborate weddings are a good place to “cut back” as far as offering free church services, but that’s just my perspective. And if we have to agree to disagree, Sam, I’m willing to do that, Hon.
I’ll still love you to death!
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OutinChgoburbs
Guest
There are two Assumptions in Chicago.
Assumption BVM is one of the “Polish Parishes” of the Archdiocese of Chicago, included with St. Hedwig, Five Holy Martyrs, and St. Hyacinth. It’s in Pullman, really.
The other one is on Illinois, and more toward Greektown than the Loop.It is run by the Servites (Servants of Mary).
Now, according to this link, there is a $700 fee at Assumption. $200 of it is a deposit. It does not include music or a cantor. It DOES include FOCCUS, the one-day marriage prep retreaty-thingie, and the other stuff necessary to prepare for a marriage. I think because Assumption takes Catholics from all over Chicago, they get a lot of “no shows” and have to have the stiff fee to make sure people either follow-trhough, or cancel and ask for the deposit back.
Again, people who have simpler ceremonies I am almost positive can get away with a much cheaper fee. Also, you might want to go to the Archdiocese web site, look up other parishes, and see how much they ask for a deposit, FOCCUS, etc.
Assumption BVM is one of the “Polish Parishes” of the Archdiocese of Chicago, included with St. Hedwig, Five Holy Martyrs, and St. Hyacinth. It’s in Pullman, really.
The other one is on Illinois, and more toward Greektown than the Loop.It is run by the Servites (Servants of Mary).
Now, according to this link, there is a $700 fee at Assumption. $200 of it is a deposit. It does not include music or a cantor. It DOES include FOCCUS, the one-day marriage prep retreaty-thingie, and the other stuff necessary to prepare for a marriage. I think because Assumption takes Catholics from all over Chicago, they get a lot of “no shows” and have to have the stiff fee to make sure people either follow-trhough, or cancel and ask for the deposit back.
Again, people who have simpler ceremonies I am almost positive can get away with a much cheaper fee. Also, you might want to go to the Archdiocese web site, look up other parishes, and see how much they ask for a deposit, FOCCUS, etc.
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Bubble
Guest
Wow, I must be living under a rock. I’ve never heard of anyone having to pay a fee to use a Catholic Church to get married. And, $700 seems totally outlandish to me.
Marriage is a Sacrament and the Church shouldn’t make people pay to receive any sacrament. This does not set well with me at all. Of course, a Church needs money to run, but the principle of making people pay for God’s grace is appalling. The money to cover the use of the building for marriages should be budgeted in some other way.
I was married in a cathedral 8 years ago and it was free. We paid the priest, organist, altar servers for their services . . . but a fee for using the building never came up in the entire preparation process.
None of my three married sisters had to pay a fee either. Two were married in a Catholic church and one was married in a Lutheran church.
Maybe, this is a regional thing.
to me.Marriage is a Sacrament and the Church shouldn’t make people pay to receive any sacrament. This does not set well with me at all. Of course, a Church needs money to run, but the principle of making people pay for God’s grace is appalling. The money to cover the use of the building for marriages should be budgeted in some other way.
I was married in a cathedral 8 years ago and it was free. We paid the priest, organist, altar servers for their services . . . but a fee for using the building never came up in the entire preparation process.
None of my three married sisters had to pay a fee either. Two were married in a Catholic church and one was married in a Lutheran church.
Maybe, this is a regional thing.
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whatevergirl
Guest
We must be living under the same rock.Wow, I must be living under a rock. I’ve never heard of anyone having to pay a fee to use a Catholic Church to get married. And, $700 seems totally outlandish
Marriage is a Sacrament and the Church shouldn’t make people pay to receive any sacrament. This does not set well with me at all. Of course, a Church needs money to run, but the principle of making people pay for God’s grace is appalling. The money to cover the use of the building for marriages should be budgeted in some other way.
I was married in a cathedral 8 years ago and it was free. We paid the priest, organist, altar servers for their services . . . but a fee for using the building never came up in the entire preparation process.
None of my three married sisters had to pay a fee either. Two were married in a Catholic church and one was married in a Lutheran church.
Maybe, this is a regional thing.
My husband and I did not have a formal wedding, but had a special Catholic procession after a Sunday mass with a few family members, friends, etc…, after we were married by a JOP. And there was no cost for it.
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CatholicSam
Guest
Oh Truly, I’m notMaybe I’m totally naive (it wouldn’t be the first time
I think elaborate weddings are a good place to “cut back” as far as offering free church services, but that’s just my perspective. And if we have to agree to disagree, Sam, I’m willing to do that, Hon.
at you! 
I’m just annoyed at the sound of this system. But once again, I have never lived in an area where such an expensive church fee was the norm. Maybe if I lived in such a parish community I would understand better where you’re coming from.It is unfortunate that only a third of the parishioners really contribute, but then maybe the other 2/3 are saving up for the wedding fee
No seriously, if the church’s intent is to make up for loss of revenue (you know, to pay the bills, the rent, and the personnel) from the 2/3 that drop a few dimes into the collection plate on Sunday, then they should offer a discount to those who DO tithe.I’d actually rather see modest stipends for all church services (weddings, baptisms, confirmations, funerals, burials, renewal of vows, etc.) than lump it all into the wedding crowd. But that’s just me and once again I haven’t been in that situation myself.
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Truly_Beloved
Guest
In my experience, those who tithe (time/talent/treasure) often do get a discount, or are able to negotiate. And, of course, anyone for whom the fee would be a hardship just contributes what they can. But the people who can’t afford the church fee aren’t going to blow $50k-$75k on a wedding, either.
I have never known anyone who was denied a wedding in the Church because they didn’t have money.Now, of course, someone here will come out of the woodworks and introduce themselves to me so that I can’t say that anymore.
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OutinChgoburbs
Guest
As I recall way back in the 70s and 80s, the “girls” in whose weddings I bridesmaided paid $100-$300 for marriage prep, heat or a/c, etc.
So, maybe it it regional. But I think simpler exchanges of vows do not encounter this expense. And I am positive that a simple exchange of vows does not include a church rental.
So, maybe it it regional. But I think simpler exchanges of vows do not encounter this expense. And I am positive that a simple exchange of vows does not include a church rental.
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Cristiano
Guest
1- If all the members of the parish would give 10% of their income every week than we would not have the problem of asking for extra money to cover expenses during special occasions.
2- If people would be willing to receive the sacraments within the regular Mass, and without pump, then things would be cheaper too.
3- How would you feel if the parish would charge a weekly usage fee to all the members of the parish just for use of the facilities? We must remember that this is our church and that we have to support it.
4- What we own is a gift that we have been given, and now we are asking for even more? I think that a lot has to do with our secular attitude that is so difficult to shed.
2- If people would be willing to receive the sacraments within the regular Mass, and without pump, then things would be cheaper too.
3- How would you feel if the parish would charge a weekly usage fee to all the members of the parish just for use of the facilities? We must remember that this is our church and that we have to support it.
4- What we own is a gift that we have been given, and now we are asking for even more? I think that a lot has to do with our secular attitude that is so difficult to shed.
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Sr_Sally
Guest
How long does a baptism take? Usually it is a brief service held immediately after a Mass. People don’t stay after for 1/2 hour to an hour of photos nor do they need an evening ahead of time for rehearsal.
The same is true for funerals. While there is hopefully a full Mass, all the other activity (wakes, etc.) usually take place in the funeral parlor or the family’s home. And, really, I don’t know how much a funeral costs. The funeral parlor may pay the church’s stipend out of their fee which is why we don’t think of it costing extra.
And finally, as many have stated, brides (couples) often shop for the prettiest/largest/whateverst church. They are often not activitely involved in the parish where they want to get married. A higher fee for that use helps to curb that behavior.
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Leopard
Guest
This is correct, at least in my parish.
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puzzleannie
Guest
where is the dead horse smiley when you need itWow, I must be living under a rock. I’ve never heard of anyone having to pay a fee to use a Catholic Church to get married. And, $700 seems totally outlandish
Marriage is a Sacrament and the Church shouldn’t make people pay to receive any sacrament.
as has been stated, here and the dozens of previous threads beating this topic to death, the charge is for use of the parish facilities, not for the sacrament. If you don’t believe the fee charged in your case is appropriate ask the pastor for a breakdown of the charges what they cover. In these days of 5 figure wedding budgets to quibble about covering the parish overhead for use of the facilities is IMO bridezilla in the extreme.
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Corki
Guest
Now, according to this link, there is a $700 fee at Assumption. $200 of it is a deposit. It does not include music or a cantor. It DOES include FOCCUS, the one-day marriage prep retreaty-thingie, and the other stuff necessary to prepare for a marriage. I think because Assumption takes Catholics from all over Chicago, they get a lot of “no shows” and have to have the stiff fee to make sure people either follow-trhough, or cancel and ask for the deposit back.
Again, people who have simpler ceremonies I am almost positive can get away with a much cheaper fee. Also, you might want to go to the Archdiocese web site, look up other parishes, and see how much they ask for a deposit, FOCCUS, etc.
Ok, so breaking that down:
FOCUS - when we did that program, FOCUS involved one day of taking the assessment, one meeting with the priest to go over the results and another follow up meeting to review once we had had time to think about it and discuss. What’s the going hourly rate for a trained counselor to give pre-marriage counseling? About $100 an hour conservatively.
One day retreat - again, dating myself, ours was 2 days and included three simple meals (for 2), a team of 4 giving the retreat (plus Father), materials, etc. When I did training, we could get something like this for about $300 per day plus meals if we brought our own trainers. With 10 couples, that’s only $30 plus meals.
Rental of space for the ceremony, parking for guests included. - a friend recently got married, rented a run down former lodge hall and we had street parking. She paid $500 (plus a deposit). This was in a rural town, not in a city setting.
Sounds to me like $700 is a bargain.
Now, how long have you been a member of this parish? Are there things you already do in your service to the parish where you could increase your time and negotiate an off-set?
Many parishes operate in the red in terms of weekly operating expenses vs. weekly collection income. Rental of the buildings, be it church halls or the main sanctuary is a reasonably way for the parish to add income.
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