Is being sexually aroused sinful?

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Epistemes

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Hello,

I’m curious about this topic.

Is being sexually aroused (outside of marriage) sinful?

Say, for instance, you’re watching a movie with a fairly intimate love scene. No indecent flesh is exposed, but nonetheless you find yourself aroused even though you try to stave off the typical lustful thoughts of, “I’d like to be in bed with him/her!”

Or say that sexual innuendo gets a person aroused, again, fairly exclusive of lustful intentions. How culpable are you?

For some men (because I can’t speak for women), just looking at a full-figured woman might trigger arousal even though the guy isn’t fantasizing in his mind anything consciously inappropriate.

Thoughts?
 
It is my experience that such things can lead to sin. I don’t believe that arousal itself is sinful, Greg Popcak exceptionalmarriages.com/ refers to “finding yourself” stimulated (perhaps “turned-on” would be more vernacular terminology) is a good way to remind yourself to thank God for that person-- the beautiful person they are. This keeps you focused on the person, and on God.

Anyway, like I say, I find it much easier to just avoid this sort of “stimulation”.
 
Epistemes,
being sexually aroused isn’t sinful, its a biological response, which if we didn’t have it, the species would’ve gone extinct long ago.

However, we can soon move into lust, if sexual desire isn’t controlled.

Males are stimulated visually, so its best to be vigilant on what you allow your eyes to see.

Remember the scripture verse, “make no provisions for desires of the flesh.”

A priest jokingly said that when he was in the seminary, they were told, you could look at a female anatomy for no more than 30seconds. Beyond that, you’ll start getting yourself into trouble. It was told in humor, but I found it to be right on.

So, obey the 30 second rule.

By the time you get to my age, concentrating on anything for longer than that is a struggle in itself. 😃

Jim
 
Epistemes said:
Hello,

I’m curious about this topic.

Is being sexually aroused (outside of marriage) sinful?

Say, for instance, you’re watching a movie with a fairly intimate love scene. No indecent flesh is exposed, but nonetheless you find yourself aroused even though you try to stave off the typical lustful thoughts of, “I’d like to be in bed with him/her!”

Or say that sexual innuendo gets a person aroused, again, fairly exclusive of lustful intentions. How culpable are you?

For some men (because I can’t speak for women), just looking at a full-figured woman might trigger arousal even though the guy isn’t fantasizing in his mind anything consciously inappropriate.

Thoughts?
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Nope. It’s biological. We’re made that way. That’s how our species has survived for four million years.
 
Control what you watch. Avoid the near occasion of sin by turning your head or closing your eyes to say a prayer. Remind yourself that she is someone’s daughter, sister, mother or wife. I know what you mean…avoid it all the time. I went to a school known for it’s “hot babes”. Fortuneately for me my wife was just as “hot” even hotter because she is a sister in Christ…Don’t come any hotter than that.😉 Working of 20 years of marriage and still love her more than ever before. makes me wonder just how much God truly loves us. 30 seconds would have be in hell. So mine is a 5 second rule that sometimes extends to 10 seconds if I’m tired.😉 I do radical things to change the thoughts if they enter. Put those thought out of your mind. Think about the Blessed Mother.
 
I’m not sure why this is under spirituality rather than morality, but here is a more spirituality oriented question:
What if you’re sexually aroused by prayer?

It’s something that doesn’t seem to get much attention. It definitely seems to be implied and tacitly accepted in the writings of female mystic saints (spiritual espousals of Jesus and all). . . .

It definitely seems to be a certain element of female spirituality.

That’s why I knew I wasn’t called to the priesthood. People say the key to chastity is prayer and meditation and all that, but the more I pray, the more aroused I become. When I’m near the Eucharist, my whole body longs for Jesus uncontrollably.

This has always been the source of great moral and spiritual confusion for me.
 
GodsGadfly, this is noted in some spiritual texts. Fr Dubay mentions it in Fire Within here (and drawing from Teresa of Avila). He also suggests how to handle it…that is, don’t pay too much attention to it. When you do, then it can go in sinful directions…

Although I can’t point to writings offhand, I have heard of this happening with men too, not just women mystics.

It seems to me reasonable to think that our body and soul are a unity, what when we long for complete connection with God, this is what our body does, how it responds. It doesn’t mean we have a sexual relationship with God, obviously, but that we are sexual beings. It seems when mystics mention this, the feelings are a little vague, which makes sense. It’s a bodily reaction to a soulful yearning for God, for completeness.
 
Ironic,

Thanks. I should specify–I’m a man. If I were a woman, I wouldn’t have a problem with it as much. My wife has the same experience. As a man, it made me sure I was called to marriage, versus the priesthood.

But it makes it really hard when it’s Phase II, and I’m doing everything I can to keep myself on the straight and narrow, and then I go to my Holy Hour on Thursday night, and I come home really wanting to make love to my wife.
 
GodsGadfly said:
Ironic,

Thanks. I should specify–I’m a man. If I were a woman, I wouldn’t have a problem with it as much. My wife has the same experience. As a man, it made me sure I was called to marriage, versus the priesthood.

But it makes it really hard when it’s Phase II, and I’m doing everything I can to keep myself on the straight and narrow, and then I go to my Holy Hour on Thursday night, and I come home really wanting to make love to my wife.
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Interesting - it’s not really something I ever considered - the possible link between spiritual and sexual ecstasy.

But it makes sense. Remember that the relationship between a marital couple (including their sexual intimacy) is a reflection and likeness of the relationship between God and humanity - the link is as old as the Song of Songs. In which case it may well be right and proper that you make the link in this way as well 🤷
 
GodsGadfly said:
Ironic,

But it makes it really hard when it’s Phase II, and I’m doing everything I can to keep myself on the straight and narrow, and then I go to my Holy Hour on Thursday night, and I come home really wanting to make love to my wife.
Click to expand...
Well…all the greater sacrifice to “give it up”, I guess! Or follow your impulses and chance welcoming new life! 😉

Seriously, I get it. But maybe recognizing it for what it is can help.
 
Epistemes said:
Hello,

I’m curious about this topic.

Is being sexually aroused (outside of marriage) sinful?

Say, for instance, you’re watching a movie with a fairly intimate love scene. No indecent flesh is exposed, but nonetheless you find yourself aroused even though you try to stave off the typical lustful thoughts of, “I’d like to be in bed with him/her!”

Or say that sexual innuendo gets a person aroused, again, fairly exclusive of lustful intentions. How culpable are you?

For some men (because I can’t speak for women), just looking at a full-figured woman might trigger arousal even though the guy isn’t fantasizing in his mind anything consciously inappropriate.

Thoughts?
Click to expand...
When it comes to entertainment each man must learn his tolerance level. If you can watch a movie without becoming “disturbed” then I would suppose that you are not exposing yourself to a near occasion of sin…(which would be a sin by the way) There is no reason why a director has to show the hot and heavy scenes other than to lead the sheep to slaughter.

As for me, watching something like that would probably lead me right back to “Porn City” and the subsequent act of impurity that almost always results. Men, why expose yourself to this stupidity unless you want to be guilty of mortal sin later on? I don’t know about you guys, but I am too weak to resist that stuff. Only God’s grace has kept me clean for the last 4 months.

I’m not going to send my eternal soul into the flames of Hell just so some wealthy hot shot Hollywood movie director can buy a second beach house in Hawaii.

No Thanks!

:cool: :cool: :cool:
 
Great post, TLM. So true. Love the phrase about bringing the sheep to slaughter.

We women, too, need to be aware of this.

Thanks.
 
GodsGadfly said:
I’m not sure why this is under spirituality rather than morality, but here is a more spirituality oriented question:
What if you’re sexually aroused by prayer?

It’s something that doesn’t seem to get much attention. It definitely seems to be implied and tacitly accepted in the writings of female mystic saints (spiritual espousals of Jesus and all). . . .

It definitely seems to be a certain element of female spirituality.

That’s why I knew I wasn’t called to the priesthood. People say the key to chastity is prayer and meditation and all that, but the more I pray, the more aroused I become. When I’m near the Eucharist, my whole body longs for Jesus uncontrollably.

This has always been the source of great moral and spiritual confusion for me.
Click to expand...
Wow - creepy and disturbing.

I think you’ve misread these mystics completely, mistaking their intense spiritual ecstasy with something sexual.
 
It is if it results in lustful thoughts and when you’re sexually aroused, 99% of the time there are lustful thoughts. That said, Catholics should not be watching movies that contain scenes that arouse lustful thoughts within them.
 
movies yeah but t.v. is bad enough. Not to mention walking around outside. 🙂 I just say a hail mary in my head. that controls your thoughts.

pax vobiscum
 
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