Is hand holding during the Our Father practiced outside the United States?

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Jon_S said:
And yet you say it is not unifying. I say it is very very unifying. I can literally feel the prayers if the congregation when we do it.

I think you guys need to lighten up.
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Because it is not unifying. It is plainly devisive, as you can see on this thread.
 
acacia12 said:
At a quick glance, it seems that it is us from the UK that don’t particularly care for the hand holding. Possibly a cultural thing.
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I don’t think so. I was born in Italy which is probably the most tactile country in the world but it’s not done there - nor elsewhere in Europe.
 
angelic06 said:
Because it is not unifying. It is plainly devisive, as you can see on this thread.
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It only seems divisive in parishes where it’s not done.

I believe it should be done if the parish wants to. If they don’t then they don’t and people should go along with the program.

It is neither wrong nor right universally.

As an example my baptist parents came to my Easter Vigil. They do not believe in the real presence, the Catholic Church, not is kneeling in any way part of their custom and is out of their comfort zone.

But they kneeled in mass to be one with the congregation.

So too should hand holding be done in a parish that does it and not done in a parish that does not do it.
 
Jon_S said:
So too should hand holding be done in a parish that does it and not done in a parish that does not do it.
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Does respect for the wishes of the other not come into your considerations?

Whether I kneel or sit for prayer does not affect another person, so your example of your parents kneeling is not really pertinent. However, someone grabbing another hand is normally a violation of someone’s privacy, and so should be done only if another person willingly consents. Some of us do not.
 
I was with ya john at least in spirit until your recent posts. Insinuating that one ought to hold hands if a majority do is just plain old wrong.

In my old diocese it was common here, not so much. But where it was common it was either because people did not know, and it was a voluntary reaction. Rarely did the thought process go like “well, it unifies us as a people and our prayers?” But usually it was well, everyone else does it so I will too. Now that is just not a good way to participate in ANY liturgical thing.

Sometimes being countercultural is a calling we have even in our own parishes. (sadly) No person should ever be made to touch another. not by shame and not by peer pressure. Especially if that touch is not part of the Mass. Which hand holding is certainly NOT part of the Mass.

The person having a spittle flecked nutty about the issue has more standing than the person who thinks people should be made to do it.🤷
 
angelic06 said:
Does respect for the wishes of the other not come into your considerations?

Whether I kneel or sit for prayer does not affect another person, so your example of your parents kneeling is not really pertinent. However, someone grabbing another hand is normally a violation of someone’s privacy, and so should be done only if another person willingly consents. Some of us do not.
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Oh sure. I don’t think anyone should be grabbing hands of those who don’t want to.

I will never understand this phobia people have with holding hands but it is their right not to participate. They just should not condemn the 90% because of their phobia, not should they deem it divisive since they are welcome to participate and choose not to.
 
Jon_S said:
Oh sure. I don’t think anyone should be grabbing hands of those who don’t want to.

I will never understand this phobia people have with holding hands but it is their right not to participate. They just should not condemn the 90% because of their phobia, not should they deem it divisive since they are welcome to participate and choose not to.
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Not wanting physical contact with a stranger is not a “phobia”. Some of us are very private people and simply don’t like our personal space being invaded by strangers. I can tolerate a quick handshake at the sign of the peace, but don’t care to have extended physical contact with someone other than my wife.

Others don’t care. It’s just the variety of human nature, just as some are extroverts and some are introverts. I am one of those who doesn’t like his private space invaded by others. I only ask that those who don’t mind physical contact, please respect that.
 
angelic06 said:
Because it is not unifying. It is plainly devisive, as you can see on this thread.
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The internet is not the Church. I have never seen this issue faze anyone outside of CAF. I am sure it does happen, but I have never seen it.
 
Jon_S said:
I say it is very very unifying. I can literally feel the prayers if the congregation when we do it.
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Then let’s do it when the rubrics dictate it, at the exchange of peace.

“For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.”
Ecclesiastes 3:1

It’s not about how you feel.
 
ProVobis said:
Then let’s do it when the rubrics dictate it, at the exchange of peace.

“For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.”
Ecclesiastes 3:1

It’s not about how you feel.
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Really? We should feel nothing in the mass? I never said it was about how I feel, simply that I can feel the power of the prayer. It is about worshiping God, and I’m certain he does not mind us holding hands… In fact, I’d wager he smiles upon seeing the love of his creation for fellow believers, and the unity they have.

Let’s do the Our Father how the rubrics tell us…How is that again?
 
We live in Italy, and I have rarely seen hand holding at Mass except at Santa Susanna, the parish for the American community in Rome. I don’t know what happened on Holy Thursday at Pope Francis’s Mass, but hand holding is uncommon at the Vatican. I have never seen it in an ordinary Italian parish. It is not practiced in our home parish in the diocese of Arlington, Virginia, either.
 
Jon_S said:
… I’m certain he does not mind us holding hands… In fact, I’d wager he smiles upon seeing the love of his creation for fellow believers, and the unity they have.

Let’s do the Our Father how the rubrics tell us…How is that again?
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I’m not wagering anything. See #88.

But I agree with the poster who says this is a divisive topic.
 
liturgyluver said:
I believe this ghastly practice is indeed an American phenomenan. There was an American family in front of me at mass a few weeks ago and they all held hands during the Our Father and sort of lifted them up towards the end of prayer as if it was some kind of climax - I have never seen this before. At our church we also go up for communion row by row, but they sort of pushed their way to the end of the row and marched up out of sequence.
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I almost died laughing. Thanks for that smile. I detest this practice and almost everyone lifts their hands (imitating the priest) not realizing this is his prayer posture. In order not to have someone trying to grab my hand, I close my eyes and fold my hands in prayer. Also: I’m a germaphobe so that’s another issue to me about this…it doesn’t help that our priest says, “Let’s all join hands and say the Lord’s prayer together.” (wince)😦
 
pianistclare said:
The Apostles kissed the Lord. I’ll kiss my husband on the cheek as well.
I don’t do it to “have a good time”.
Wow.
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A priest in one local parish here discourages us from kissing during mass. Well, he suggested we try to treat everyone the same in mass. He said that some give people around kisses. With others, shake hands, etc.

Well, he was saying that it would be best to do the same with everyone. If you were going to kiss, then he’d want it to be across the board, but he preferred we just shake hands with everyone, then.

I remember reading an article about Ivana Trump, and she said some rules she lives by. She said she tries to treat her friends similarly. In other words, she said she shakes hands with all her friends so as not to show favoritism.

She said that it can cause hard feelings to greet one friend with a kiss, another with a handshake, that this, in itself, is a statement.
 
Jon_S said:
Oh sure. I don’t think anyone should be grabbing hands of those who don’t want to.

I will never understand this phobia people have with holding hands but it is their right not to participate. They just should not condemn the 90% because of their phobia, not should they deem it divisive since they are welcome to participate and choose not to.
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Just because one doesn’t want to hold hands with strangers doesn’t necessarily mean all these 90% of people have a “phobia”.

I find that all this holding hands distracting and leading to a certain informality that I find inappropriate.

Some will also do what they call “liftoff”, raise their hands into the air, and take our hands with them.

I find some of these acts an attempt to imitate the celebrant.

Some get upset if one doesn’t want to do this.
 
ClearWater said:
Just because one doesn’t want to hold hands with strangers doesn’t necessarily mean all these 90% of people have a “phobia”.

I find that all this holding hands distracting and leading to a certain informality that I find inappropriate.

Some will also do what they call “liftoff”, raise their hands into the air, and take our hands with them.

I find some of these acts an attempt to imitate the celebrant.

Some get upset if one doesn’t want to do this.
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Fair enough,

But it seems some areas allow or even recommend the laity have their hands in the same posture as the celebrant so I don’t think that is really an issue right?
 
liturgyluver said:
I believe this ghastly practice is indeed an American phenomenan. There was an American family in front of me at mass a few weeks ago and they all held hands during the Our Father and sort of lifted them up towards the end of prayer as if it was some kind of climax - I have never seen this before. At our church we also go up for communion row by row, but they sort of pushed their way to the end of the row and marched up out of sequence.
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I know that IrishGal finds this post funny, but to me it sounds a little uncharitable and mean. Was this American Family visitors to your parish and perhaps unaware of the customs of your parish?
Anyways, I too have been a visitor to different parishes before and also completely messed up the communion line when it came time to receive the Blessed Sacrament. What happened was it was a parish that had 3 aisles heading towards the altar. I had actually found a spot to sit not in the back in the church but in the middle. And when it came time for communion, I had started my communion prayers that I always say, to prepare myself for the Blessed Sacrament. I thought that the communion line was pretty straightforward, except what I didn’t know is that when they reach the middle of the church, the parish is directed to go to a different line, than what I was expecting to be directed to. I had been so involved with my prayers, that I just did not pay attention to what my neighbor was doing. It was my turn to walk into the communion line and I wasn’t paying attention, I didn’t realize it was my turn to go forward. I had mistakenly delayed communion for the entire back half of the parish.
It was very embarassing, but the thought that members of that parish could still be gossiping about me today as you are gossiping about this family, it does sound a little too critical and mean.

Anyways back to hand holding, every parish that I’ve attended holds hands. The parishes I’ve attended in California, they hold hands. The parishes in Florida, they hold hands too. Also the parishes I’ve attended in Missouri. The parish I attend right now in my state in the midwest, we hold hands. I’ve never been to a parish in which we did not hold hands, Although I’m about to take a trip to Oregon, I don’t know if they hold hands there or not. When I am there I will try my best to respectful to the culture of the parish, but I can’t promise that I won’t make a mistake.
 
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