Is it a calling, or a responsibility, to be a lector or eucharistic minister?

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Okay, let me clarify ahead of time that I mean no disrespect to women who fill these roles and I apologize if you are offended. I have four children. Three boys ages 14,12 and 8 plus a girl who is 5. I have always been of the understanding that lectors, altar servers and euchristic ministers of the body and blood were originally men and that placing women and girls in these roles was intended to be done out of necessity when guys were not available. This has now evolved to the point that one rarely sees men filling these roles. As my oldest will be experiencing confirmation next year I have explained to him that I feel these roles are the responsibilty of the men of the parish and that I will require each of my boys to step up into these areas as their ages permit. My two oldest are altar servers per my telling them they would do it in grade three when our parish begins training for that role. After confirmation next year I will expect my oldest to become a lector or eucharistic minister. Our deacon, upon hearing this is how I feel, has pulled my son aside and told him I am wrong. That it is a calling to do these things and that if my son does not want to become either that he should let him know and as deacon he will forbid my son going through the training thus overruling me as a parent.
I don’t have a problem with women stepping up to the plate and filling the need here but I feel that the men are dropping the ball and are not fulfilling their duties to their parish. One is at church already and there really is nothing one has to do to prepare apart from being mentally and spiritually ready. I feel rather strongly about this and would like to see how others feel. Tell me what you think about this. Thanks!
Rebecca
 
I am both a Lector and EMHC.
I believe that this is more of a “calling” than “responsibility”.

While your children are just that, yours, I do not believe that you should dictate to them what they will and will not do as far as service to the church.

We all have different gifts, and should not be forced to do something that we may or not not be able to do. For example, I lector and have been told that I have a wonderful speaking voice, that I project well and that I make the readings “come alive”. Someone suggested that I become a Cantor, well speaking and singing are two totally different things.😉 I love music and can read it and I also play a few instruments (not well, but I enjoy it), but singing…NO WAY!!!
 
Rebecca_Fleming said:
Okay, let me clarify ahead of time that I mean no disrespect to women who fill these roles and I apologize if you are offended. I have four children. Three boys ages 14,12 and 8 plus a girl who is 5. I have always been of the understanding that lectors, altar servers and euchristic ministers of the body and blood were originally men and that placing women and girls in these roles was intended to be done out of necessity when guys were not available. This has now evolved to the point that one rarely sees men filling these roles. As my oldest will be experiencing confirmation next year I have explained to him that I feel these roles are the responsibilty of the men of the parish and that I will require each of my boys to step up into these areas as their ages permit. My two oldest are altar servers per my telling them they would do it in grade three when our parish begins training for that role. After confirmation next year I will expect my oldest to become a lector or eucharistic minister. Our deacon, upon hearing this is how I feel, has pulled my son aside and told him I am wrong. That it is a calling to do these things and that if my son does not want to become either that he should let him know and as deacon he will forbid my son going through the training thus overruling me as a parent.
I don’t have a problem with women stepping up to the plate and filling the need here but I feel that the men are dropping the ball and are not fulfilling their duties to their parish. One is at church already and there really is nothing one has to do to prepare apart from being mentally and spiritually ready. I feel rather strongly about this and would like to see how others feel. Tell me what you think about this. Thanks!
Rebecca
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First and foremost a calling is also a responsibility. Serving the Church in different roles is a calling and it must be discerned by each individual. If I read your post I can see the irony of a Freudian Lapsus. You said that you will expect your oldest son to become a “eucharistic minister”, that says to me that you expect him to become a priest. However, the priesthood as well as the diaconate, being a reader, a catechist etc. is the response to a vocation. While you should support end even encourage them to be open to possible vocations you are not to impose them, leave it to the Holy Spirit. Being a constant role model and teaching doctrine and how to live the faith is an effective way to help your children to open their hearts and their minds to those roles in the Church.

A final point is that among lay people there is no preference between men and women when it comes to non ordained/instituted roles. The only case where I clearly see a priority but not a preference is in the case of altar servers, because that role has an added goal that is possible only for men.
 
I think it’s probably both, but more so a calling. I doubt this is stated anywhere officially. I have served in many various liturgical roles such as cantor, lector, EM, altar server, greeter, sacristan, etc. and all of these responsibilities must be accepted both freely and seriously. I have been in the position of training and coordinating others to fill these roles and “finding” people in an emergency, and I can say how important those two words are: seriously and freely.

The person must be serious, as in serious enough to check in on time (or arrange for a substitute), in proper attire, and mentally and spiritually prepared to serve. They should take their training seriously - especially lectors. The word must be understood and prayed over by the lector, and then practiced to proclaim it in a manner that is both meaningful and easily heard by the congregation. Not overdramatic, but not monotone. Not rushed, but not - broken - up - every two - words. Not nervously. Not with mispronunciations or an accent too difficult to understand. In accordance with the realities of the sound system.

The person must accept this responsibility freely. They shouldn’t feel coerced into it, even if they serve regularly but it’s an emergency. They shouldn’t be required to do it by the family or by a confirmation program. In a sense, then, it is a calling. Part of the calling is you encouraging your son to do it. Part of the calling would have to be his interior desire to serve well. Part of the calling would be the pastor’s/liturgist’s willingness to train and schedule him. Part of the calling would be the parish’s openness to having him continue to serve.
 
Our parish is in the beginning of an evangelical renewal. Father is asking people to discern which of 5 areas that they will serve in. One of the area is Lector/ EMHC. Not everyone can get up in public and speak. I’m one of those people. I have discerned and chosen different areas to serve in.

If it were me and my family I would make the rule that one has to serve the church some how, but not dictate how. If my kid ended up scrubbing church toilets, well, she is serving in some capacity.
 
Not to play with words, but I think it is both.

We are all, every one of us, given unique gifts to enhance the body of Christ and we are called by Jesus to respond to those gifts (see 1 COR 12:4-11 and MATT 5:13-16).

We have the responsibility to discern what those gifts are and then to respond accordingly.

To the OP: I think your Deacon is spot-on. If you son has a calling to be an EMHC then he has to take the responsibility to step up and follow that calling. He may or may not ready to take the responsibility now. If he has no calling to be an EMHC, forcing it upon him will not only potentially turn him off to the Church but will also be a waste of the true gifts that God calls him to bring.
Personal Story: When my son was at the right age I really tried to get him to serve at the altar but he did not truly want to and I did not push him. Looking back, I see his serving would have been more to make me proud (stupid me) than for his spiritual fulfillment. He is currently active in our PREP, vacation bible school and teen programs - that is where his calling is now and he has stepped up to take responsibility for them.
 
I would like to add that since the 2nd gr. my oldest has felt a calling to the priesthood by no influence from me. I would never force him to become one and I guess I wouldn’t force him to be a lector or otherwise if he would be strongly opposed. I appreciate the responses so far and I will try to keep an open mind. He is very reverent and both my older boys are glad that I required them to be altar servers. They both like the role and they like being able to contribute their service to weekly mass. They receive many compliments and some have said they prefer seeing my boys up there because they are properly dressed and reverent in their attitude. There are only 4-5 kids signed up for our mass time and much of the time my kids are up there weekly due to filling in for the ones that don’t show up. Maybe I should consider that they are already filling their duties with being altar servers? They step up to the plate willing and without complaint in this capacity. Thanks for the (name removed by moderator)ut.
Rebecca
 
As a long time Lector and LEM I believe that although both are a calling and responsibility mostly it is a great privilege. When we are given gifts of the Holy Spirit it is our respnsibility to use those gifts for the building up of the church. What an awesome responsibility, privilege and honor it is to problaim the Word of God and to bring the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of our Lord to others. No one is worthy of that privilege. Only the Holy Spirit can make it possible. No one should be told they have to serve as a Lector or EM. There are many ways to serve the Church and each should discern how they are to serve.
 
As someone pointed out Eucharistic Minister = priest or deacon so that’s absolutely a vocation (and a responsibility)

Lector = instituted role, the deacon has no say, the diocese decides. Most lectors are seminarians. Some diocese have formal instituted lector and acolyte programs but, at least in my diocese, the minimum age is 21. Don’t worry, the role of lector isn’t open to women so there is no danger of it being over-run. 😉

The other roles such as EMHC and reader, in my opinion, are service areas. Giving to the Church in that way is part of the formula of “Time, treasure and talents”. One may feel “called” to give of oneself in this way in the same way one may feel “called” to bake cakes for the bake sale or to literally tithe but it isn’t the same kind of a calling as a vocation.

As your children grow older, it’s perfectly reasonable that you tell them you expect them to take on more service in the church. My kids are altar servers and it wasn’t a choice. We have few children in our parish and both Father and I let them know that serving in this way was expected as part of being part of the parish community. My parish doesn’t allow teens to serve as EMHCs or readers and I have mixed feelings about using teens in those roles unless it is a student parish. However, if there was a practice of teen readers I would sign my kids right up.
 
Rebecca_Fleming said:
After confirmation next year I will expect my oldest to become a lector or eucharistic minister.
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The responses given above all sound correct, but I wanted to call attention to this line just to point out that the most you could possibly “expect” is for your son to offer to fill one of these role, not that the church will take him. I don’t think that’s what you meant, but it’s worth being clear. In fact, in most dioceses (you must be in the D. of Youngstown) I think EMHC is restricted to people over 18, so I would not expect him to be eligible for that.
 
Why is all this lay lectoring, altar “servers”, etc in the traditional forum - this should be moved to Liturgy and the Sacraments forums.
 
Great point, RCrusader. In the EF Mass (also known as the Traditional Latin Mass and sometimes called the Tridentine Latin Mass) we don’t need to concern ourselves with these things.

Our FSSP priest puts out a call, periodically, for Altar boys. And he trains them himself along with all the other jobs that he does.
 
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