Is it a sin not wanting to get married?

[teachccd]

Well that is good for you. And I wasn;t trying to make it sound like married couples with kids are totally selfish either. Maybe if I put it this way it will make more sense what I am trying to say. Basically married couples can have selfless reasons for getting married and having kids…but there is often/usually selfish reason tied in. And the same goes with people that remain single or get married but chose to remain childless. Also we shouldn;t assume the opening has given us all his reasons either. Now if they trully are the only reason then yeah I think they sound maybe a little selfish…but to be honest if that is the case I think one could make the argument that it would be MORE selfish for him to get married knowing how he is.

You seem to have all of the insight. You win…

 

[Lief_Erikson]

Well that is good for you. And I wasn;t trying to make it sound like married couples with kids are totally selfish either. Maybe if I put it this way it will make more sense what I am trying to say. Basically married couples can have selfless reasons for getting married and having kids…but there is often/usually selfish reason tied in. And the same goes with people that remain single or get married but chose to remain childless.

We use the word “selfish,” much too freely, though, don’t we? The love of self is good in God’s eyes, for we should be wholly united with God, loving God, loving self, and loving neighbors as oneself. The fact that people who get married are partly doing so out of love for self is not wrong. It is, in fact, good. Self-love only becomes “selfish” when it displaces one’s love for God or one’s neighbor.

The scripture says that husbands should love their wives to the extent that they’d even lay down their lives for them, and it says wives should love their husbands and submit to them. Each of these declarations demands self-sacrifice of the lover, a love for the beloved, in other words, that trumps the love for self. Thus real love in marriage is not selfish.

We tend to use the word “selfish” to refer to any love for self, nowadays, but it isn’t appropriate. Selfishness is a sin, and it only exists when the legitimate love for self displaces one’s rightful love for one’s neighbor or for God. So there isn’t selfishness in either a good marriage or an honorable celibacy.