Is it bad that I don't take part in the sign of peace?

[Thomasbradley312]

Offering someone a sign of peace can be internal. It isn’t necessarily an outward sign. If I think to myself Lord be with all those in this Church and grant them peace , I offered a sign of peace. It’s as simple as that.

 

[OraLabora]

Offering someone a sign of peace can be internal. It isn’t necessarily an outward sign. If I think to myself Lord be with all those in this Church and grant them peace , I offered a sign of peace. It’s as simple as that.

A sign is by its very nature visible. If you think to yourself “grant them peace”, that is not a sign, it is an invisible prayer.

So no, it’s not just as simple as that. We get by now that you don’t like this part of the liturgy. I’m not fond of it either, as I am a very reserved person. However, we have the choice to obey the celebrant, whose choice it is to include this in the liturgy or not.

I chose to obey, and I’ve found it beneficial. You chose not to. That’s up to you, and it’s on your conscience. But don’t try to justify your choice by twisting words beyond their very clear meaning, or by twisted arguments. Let go and let God. I’m done here.

 

[frarmandofm]

And thank you for your response.

As to me personally, I do offer ‘a’ sign of peace (usually a nod, yes I will shake hands if a child runs up to me with hand outstretched even if I suffer from painful arthritis).

I’m fine with that. I’m not saying one must offer a handshake, a full-on embrace, a kiss on the cheek, etc. A nod is fine. In fact, that’s what I did this morning at Mass.

My objection is with persons who refuse to offer any sign of peace whatsoever.

if he indeed opts to do so; my former bishop did NOT choose the option when he said Masses

As is his option. If he chooses not to, it’s his right as the celebrant of that Mass. I’m perfectly fine with that.

As to the issue of those with physical or mental health conditions which make it impossible or impractical for them to shake hands…we all need to act with charity toward our brothers and sisters. If someone chooses to respond to an offered handshake with a nod of the head or a spoken greeting, we need to graciously accept that. Passing judgment on persons who do this is an offense against charity.

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

Wrong. You’re deliberately being disobedient. You can keep on trying to rationalize your disobedience all day and all night long but by deliberately not doing what the priest in persona Christi has told all to do (without a good physical or psychological reason to refrain from it) is indeed disobedience.

But whatever. You can keep trying to fool yourself thinking that you’re doing nothing wrong, but you can’t fool God.

Sounds like He could just ask you. Lololol

Only God knows. I don’t

It’s true that you don’t, but your words say you think otherwise.

 

[MagdalenaRita]

If we are not going to participate in the sacrifice of Christ, why are we going?

Since we can have a Mass without shaking hands or nodding heads, because the sacrifice of Christ happens on the altar, then one who does not shake hands is still participating in the sacrifice on the altar.

Also, we can look at someone from our human perspective and think, oh that person doesn’t shake hands. They are not recognizing their fellow worshipers here, what a terrible Catholic they are, but it is God who looks at the heart. We are only judging someone on outward appearances and that is wrong.

 

[TheBomb.Com]

Shouldn’t the SOP be after or before the Mass. That way, it doesn’t interrupt the Communion Rite? I may not be a priest, but wouldn’t that be more efficient, and give more attention to Our Lord being made present on the Altar for our sake?

 

[tafan2]

I realize I am late to this discussion, but would like to offer my thoughts on the OP question. I have often heard the comment that the sign of peace is at a time in the mass when it disrupts one’s preparation for receiving the Blessed Sacrament. I want to be sympathetic to those who express this concern, as I suspect they are the same type of folks who I would agree with a lot of things relative to the liturgy and the faith. Certainly I felt the same way in the pass when told to stand while the community receives communion. I certainly think that modern liturgists, in the name of “community”, seem to have had little concern with the idea of actually praying at mass. But when I look at it honestly, I do not think this concern applies with regards to the placement of the sign of peace. One has just finished praying the EP, and then any private preparation, if it has started has already been distrupted by the Our Father. After the Sign of Peace, if the Agnus Dei, the preparation for communion (ie. Behold the Lamb of God…), the priest and clergy receiving communion, and then waiting for one’s turn to get up from their pew, it seems that there is plenty of opportunity for personal prayer and preparation.
So while I understand what people think of the sign of peace, I don’t really see it as rising to the level of justifying what is dangerously close to disobedience by not participating in the sign of peace. We Catholics cannot just decide what parts of the mass we like and don’t like.
Now, I do think that there is absolutely nothing wrong with a considerate, but simple, nod of the head towards our neighbor, if one does not want to shake hands, etc. I also think that everyone should be cognizant of the time when the Agnus Dei is starting and the sign of peace should not be going on in the pews during that.

Just my opinion, its worth what you paid for it.

 

[TotvsTvvs]

There’s nothing wrong with not participating, and you are far from alone. When I attend an OF I typically choose my seat so that I will not have to participate. If I am unable to find a spot by myself, I will be polite and go along to an extent, but I really don’t like being touched, so it’s rather awkward for me. I think a lot of people who love the sign of peace either discount or are unaware of how off-putting it can be for some people. Some people, though it may be limited to posters on these forums, will even go as far as to try to shame you for not wanting to take part. Just ignore them.

Wait, what do you mean by touched? At my OF Parish we do a sign of the peace, but it’s just a general glance to each other and say “Peace be with you” or just a slight wave or smile to people around.

 

[pnewton]

Offering someone a sign of peace can be internal.

Yes, and communion can be spiritual. Yet attending adoration is not obligatory, while Mass, the communal liturgy, is. If the internal was as effective as the external, there would be no need for sacraments.

I do not like seeing others judged for their lack of a sign of peace any more than I do for their dress, or any other thing at Mass. It is enough that people are at Mass. We are none perfect and all on a journey of spiritual growth. The Church has many ways of trying to teach us certain principles: homily, Scripture reading, the parts of the liturgy, etc. I think we need to be patient with each other while we are all learning our own lessons.

If I offer a fist bump (far less chance of contagion) instead of a handshake, is that an infraction (Unsportsmanlike conduct, 15 yards, etc.)?

This may have been tongue in cheek, but I actual do a fist bump with a few people. It started with my son, and now it is his friends.

On the other hand, I also usual stand during the Our Father without holding hands. I would only have to move back a few feet to be with others in the choir, but I have noticed a few scattering people who do not hold hands, and I have the desire to offer them a sense of solidarity, as well as make it clear that there is no proscribed posture.

 

[CatholicELATeacher]

I read somewhere that between handshake, high five or fist bump, handshake passes along by far the most microbes and fist bump the least. High five is somewhere in the middle, probably because the contact is so brief.

Anyway when I receive in the hand, the Eucharist goes direct from palm to mouth. I don’t pick it up with my fingers. Though I prefer on-the-tongue, when I’m not at a TLM I’m sensitive to those behind me in line.

 

[Fuerza]

Most parishes utilize a hand shake. I have no issues giving a quick nod, but that’s rarely the what happens.

 

[PeterT]

“All” is not the only word stated. The operative part of the statement from the GIRM is that “all do” something, not “all must do” something.

I think this is very specious logic at best because if this was actually the case — of having to use the intensifier “must” — to specify something is actually a requirement and not optional, then I think everything stated in the Catechism, in canon law and in the GIRM would have to be considered optional and nothing a requirment because I simply don’t recall anywhere in canon law, in the Catechism, or in the GIRM where the phrase “all must do” or just “must do” is used.

 

[TotvsTvvs]

Ah good to know! Thanks.

 

[twf]

I never liked this aspect of the liturgy myself, but always forced myself to participate, unless I’m contagious, in which case a nod and smile suffice.

In many (if not most) Vancouver parishes, a nod / bow has come to largely replace hand shaking. Hand shaking certainly still happens, but its not the norm in my experience. I suspect this is due to the Asian influence.

 

[tafan2]

This seems to be slowly happening around here. I like it better.

 

[LilyM]

If you’re uncomfortable shaking hands for whatever reason, then there is nothing at all wrong with a simple nod of the head and a “peace be with you”. That is still taking part.

If you’re uncomfortable even with doing that much … well, I don’t know what to say. Seems kinda cold not even to extend that minimal acknowledgement and god wishes to your fellow members of the Body of Christ around you, although I understand that it isn’t necessarily practice in the EF.

In medieval times, at least among nobility, the “kiss of peace” was an actual kiss, not just shaking hands. Practiced during and outside of Mass. And refusal of it, by king/lord or subject, could have significant consequences.