Is it OK to like yourself?

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dolly_finn

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I know this sounds silly but I am really struggling with this concept. Is God OK with us being kind to ourselves? Is it OK to have self esteem (I don’t mean Paris Hilton type self obsession)? I find when I am kind to myself I tend to sin less. Conversely, when I am really self-critical I can’t seem to stop sinning. But, is God OK with us being loving towards ourselves or is that a sin as well??

Thank you for reading this and God Bless!
 
OF COUSE IT’S OK TO LIKE YOURSELF. In fact it’s mandatory.
The second great commandment is to love our neighbor as our self (Mt 22:36-40).
How can we fulfill this commandment if we don’t like ourselves?

You are correct though that it needs to be a proper self love. It needs to be humble and virtuous.

Peace
James
 
Since God loves you, I don’t see how you WOULDN’T be able to be kind to yourself! Despair is a bigger sin.

As long as it’s not in a prideful, greedy sort of way, I think there is self esteem inherent in piety: If you seek to please God only, you won’t care what others think, and vice versa, if you don’t have self esteem, how can you hope to do God’s work on earth? You will wind up, locked in your room, never bringing the love God has shown you to the rest of the world.
 
Thank you both for you replies. I wasn’t sure if liking yourself (in a “Godly way” as my Protestant friends say) was a catholic concept as well. Thank you and God Bless you!
 
dolly_finn said:
I know this sounds silly but I am really struggling with this concept. Is God OK with us being kind to ourselves? Is it OK to have self esteem (I don’t mean Paris Hilton type self obsession)? I find when I am kind to myself I tend to sin less. Conversely, when I am really self-critical I can’t seem to stop sinning. But, is God OK with us being loving towards ourselves or is that a sin as well??

Thank you for reading this and God Bless!
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Christ said to love our neighbor as ourself. That implies we already love ourselves. So, in answer to your question, I think we should love ourselves.

Although, by “love”, I mean, care for one’s body, physical, emotional, spiritual needs.

Self esteem is good and necessary but not in either extreme of deficiency or excess, within normal and healthy parameters.
 
You cannot give away what you do not have. We must not only love ourselves but also like ourselves to deny ourselves and take up our cross.
 
Thank you both for your responses. What you are saying makes sense. God Bless!
 
Yes, absolutely! We have been called by LOVE and have been loved. We are to know we are loved and that love must be shared about.

Having said that, we love ourselves because we are God’s temple and on top of that Jesus resides in us as we take communion. We are filled with love. We love ourselves in a nice way. In confidence and in mercy. This love is as you mentioned is not a worldly love which is fake and temporary like the person you mentioned. Are love is an eternal joy that is full of confidence and security of God’s love. So, be assured we are loved. We love back by giving our love away to others and by going faithfully to Church and it’s sacraments. Let’s not be to hard on ourselves because we will make constant mistakes and fallings. We need get ourselves right back up and have confidence in God’s mercy.
 
On a related note, if anyone has any tips on how to love oneself, I could really use some guidance.
 
Like yourself for who you are and be happy the way God made you with the perfections and imperfections. Then follow ideas above. Good Luck. May God always love and care for you.
 
JorduSpeaks said:
On a related note, if anyone has any tips on how to love oneself, I could really use some guidance.
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The Love that we speak of here is a love that seeks the highest good for one’s self and others. That highest good is, of course, to be with God for all eternity. So this is where one starts. If you love yourself, then you do those things that will bring you closer to God.

As WilT pointed out above, we need also to be happy and accepting of ourselves. By that we mean we have to be patient with ourselves as we strive to grow in holiness - not that we accept our imperfections or sinfulness but that we recognize that growth takes time. So we are as patient with ourselves as God is with us.
The example I often use in this is the person who is dieting and exercising to lose weight and become healthier. The person recognizes the need the “imperfection” and the bad habits that led to it. They love themselves enough to want to change. They also recognize that it takes time - time to change the habits and time for the weight to come off and their health to improve.

Loving ourselves is a combination of accepting as well as seeking to grow. It avoids despair as well as wrongful pride. It does not seek after itself to the detriment of others.
hhmmmmm…I’m starting to sound a bit like St Paul who said it best. Just read 1 Cor 13:1-13.

I’m not sure that I have really answered your question…but I hope this helps some.

Peace
James
 
WilT said:
Like yourself for who you are and be happy the way God made you with the perfections and imperfections. Then follow ideas above. Good Luck. May God always love and care for you.
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I’m sorry, but who I am is an abomination. Often, it’s enough of a struggle to forgive God for creating me, let alone be grateful.
 
JorduSpeaks- you wrote “I’m sorry, but who I am is an abomination. Often, it’s enough of a struggle to forgive God for creating me, let alone be grateful.”
This makes me very sad for you. It is very hurtful to think of yourself this way. God doesn’t make any mistakes. He loves you right where you are. I am no expert on self love but it might be good to speak with your local priest about how we are to look at ourselves. You have gone way too far into negative territory. When you feel like that about yourself how can you let God’s love flow out of your to others? I will be praying for you!!
 
JorduSpeaks said:
I’m sorry, but who I am is an abomination. Often, it’s enough of a struggle to forgive God for creating me, let alone be grateful.
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What have you done that you hate yourself so? Or has other done to you. A lot of us have defects physically and some mentally and emotionally but to be an abomination…that’s not healthy at all. If it a self esteem issue get IT FIXED! God Bless you and care for you.
 
JorduSpeaks said:
I’m sorry, but who I am is an abomination. Often, it’s enough of a struggle to forgive God for creating me, let alone be grateful.
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Like the others, I’d like to hear more about why you perceive yourself this way.

Or have others found fault with you and projected their negativity onto you? Or maybe they make you feel like you’re always wrong?

If it’s more like the second one, then I’ll just throw this Jesus quote out there:

John 15:18-19
“If the world hates you, realize that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, the world would love its own; but because you do not belong to the world, and I have chosen you out of the world, the world hates you."
 
dolly_finn said:
I know this sounds silly but I am really struggling with this concept. Is God OK with us being kind to ourselves? Is it OK to have self esteem (I don’t mean Paris Hilton type self obsession)? I find when I am kind to myself I tend to sin less. Conversely, when I am really self-critical I can’t seem to stop sinning. But, is God OK with us being loving towards ourselves or is that a sin as well??

Thank you for reading this and God Bless!
Click to expand...
The Word of God says that we should love our neighbor as ourselves, thus we should love ourselves, but not inordinately. God bless you.
 
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