Is it ok to limit your friendships to just fellow Catholics?

  • Thread starter Thread starter br4ndon21
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Its completely okay to not have non Catholic friends. In fact, its Biblically recommended. You can’t be uncharitable to non-believers, but it is absolutely not your responsibility to befriend them or their families. There is a wall that shouldn’t be ignored.
 
I think it would be silly to only associate with people of your own particular faith or political persuasion , you need the confidence. To go out into the world and open your mind ,
 
Our Lord interacted with people of all backgrounds, but his close friends were Catholics.
 
I agree with Shin. Though if friends is defined to mean those people you can form a deep spiritual bond with, my wife and I would say that it’s best to limit your friends, period. We have many good people in our lives, but few who we consider friends; those who share our faith values, which we take quite serious as Church Militant. Only this faith in Christ Jesus forms a necessary part of those special persons we choose to get close to us in a more intimate way, as Christ did with us, calling us his friends[John 15:15].

We care deeply about everyone in our lives,; we respect and show kindness, love, and charity to all our fellow creatures in our lives. We care for our fellow man and interact joyfully with them every day, realizing they are our neighbors[Matt. 22:36-39]; our coworkers, grocers, classmates, teammates, dentists, tailors, and jewelers. My wife is active in social justice initiatives, and sometimes must deal with people who are dynamically opposed to those traditional Catholic beliefs she holds on the sanctity of the unborn, the family, and the rule of Christian law; yet she gladly stands with them when protesting a Nazi rally or distributing literature condemning racism, militarisation of the police, unchecked usury in an economic system based upon greed and the lust of control.

But though we treat others as we would be treated, we also never let our spiritual guard down, because we know the power of Sin, and its effect on our lives. We also have faith in Christ and his Church, and believe Them to be the only means of Salvation. So we also share our faith and take every opportunity to perform that most perfect act of Charity; leading souls to Heaven through Our Lord Jesus Christ by living our Catholic Faith publicly and with humble pride, never watering it down to please those of different faith beliefs out of a weak, misunderstood, attempt at ecumenism, hoping that the Grace we have received might inspire others to seek further, to cease being a servant of sin[John 8:34] and come to perceive Christ and His Body within the community of the Catholic Church.

We want to see this sense of strong, faithful community shared by the whole world, but don’t want to weaken our faith by presuming that those outside the Church can share in Our Lord as He commanded. So we worry when we see the fruits of a Council which proposed that other churches or religions must be respected or tolerated alongside their human members, whom we must charitably respect and tolerate, treating them as all children of the Father. We know the error and damnation that these souls are being led to by their misfortune of being separated from the Community of Christ.

But with friends, we can let our guard down a bit, relax and just enjoy each others’ company, get to really know and trust each other. We know our friends share our faith and dedication to being loyal servants of Christ Jesus. We can share a relationship as the world can never understand, because we are fortunate to have citizenship in the new Israel that is the Church of Christ wherein lives His precious Body offered up for us on the Cross, the Holy Queen who was His perfect disciple and example, and the faithful in heaven and earth whose glorious reward it is to be members of Christ. Only this Zion is precious to God.
 
I agree, it’s not particularly practical. The Church doesn’t provide enough social opportunities for fellowship like the non-Catholic ones. I always had trouble befriending people from Church. It seems like people just come for Mass and leave.
What’s funny is that our parish recently started up a few new social opportunities, none of which are at times I can ever attend. Figures.
 
‘Foremost among the soul’s affections is love. Love is the ruler of every motion of the heart; drawing all to itself, and making us like to that we love. Beware, then, my daughter, of harbouring any evil affection, or you too will become evil. And friendship is the most dangerous of all affections, because any other love may exist without much mental communication, but as friendship is founded thereon, it is hardly possible to be closely bound by its ties to any one without sharing in his qualities.’

St. Francis de Sales
 
Yes, it is a bad idea. You need to associate with all types of people. Everyone has something to offer and you in turn have something to offer non-Catholics. You may feel more comfortable with Catholics and that is certainly understandable. But give everyone a chance.
 
You might be better served,but what about serving others? How would someone feel about being shunned for not being Catholic? How would they view the Church after that? Also, I’ve Ben friends with Protestants, atheists, agnostics, and many have said that they view the Church in a more positive way after getting to know someone who’s Catholic.

Plus, you might be missing out on some great friendships!
 
there is a wide chasm between shunning people and befriending them. it’s not either or, and we’re called to serve our neighbor. (everyone)
 
It’s bizarre enough to actually ask if we should limit our associations to other Catholics; it’s even worse that others are defending such a “choice.”

There are lots of bad reasons to associate only with Catholics. 2 jump to mind:
  1. Spiritual arrogance, i.e., “I wouldn’t be caught dead associating with those non-believers!”
  2. Fear. Are we afraid those Protestants might ask us about our faith and we won’t know what to say (a most well-founded fear IMHO).
Select passages in the Bible, taken out of context, can be used to justify lots of things. The issue is what would Jesus have us do? He said to be a light to all the nations, not to hide among those who only believe as we do. His actions certainly seem to be one of engagement with all humanity.

Another point: If we associate only with “our own kind,” who defines what that is? Will being “baptized Catholic” get me in the door? Or must I follow each and every Catholic teaching? What if “our own kind” only includes those Catholics who want to avoid other non-Catholics, i.e., Would other Catholics avoid me, if I had non-Catholic friends? At some point the tent becomes so small and exclusionary that no one gets to come in (which in and of itself is a form of spiritual arrogance, i.e., it’s not that I’m not Catholic; it’s that I’m not Catholic enough.

And finally – why on earth would we want to avoid non-Catholics, when I assure you they won’t avoid us (if only to convert us?)?
 
If you want to limit your friendship to Catholics, and only befriend someone when they become Catholic, that is completely okay.
 
If you want to limit your friendship to Catholics, and only befriend someone when they become Catholic, that is completely okay.
Practically speaking, how may people are going to join the Church if no Catholic will befriend them before they join the Church?

Having said that, of course we have no choice but to limit our close friends–that is, those we confide in, those we turn to for help, those whose society determines our own outlook. We could not include everyone we know in this group if we wanted to, and it would be foolish to even try. This place of trust should be limited to those of good will, those who sincerely seek to do what is right.

If anyone wants to turn to us for help, wants to confide in us, or is willing to socialize with us in situations that are conducive to good will and obedience to God, then of course we should welcome them. If people of good will won’t have anything to do with those who seek to do good will or who need the love of God demonstrated for them so they can learn of it, then who will those who are seeking turn to? They’ll turn to the only people left who are offering answers. Needless to say, those are not going to be the answers that lead to their ultimate freedom.
 
again, define what you mean by ‘friend’, ‘befriend’, and association. Jesus’ friends were all true believers. except Judas. oops.
 
If you want to limit your friendship to Catholics, and only befriend someone when they become Catholic, that is completely okay.
So let’s see: no going to your next-door neighbor’s cookout - he’s a Methodist. No neighborhood block parties unless you live on an all-Catholic street : after all, you might find yourself drawn into a friendship with someone whose religion you don’t know. No fishing trips with the guys unless you’ve checked-out their church affiliation first. And going out after work for drinks with people from your department - apparently unwise to do that also? None of this makes any sense. This would be a daft way to live. The Church doesn’t teach any of this.
 
beware of putting yourself in the near occasion of sin. no one can make these decisions for you, but many have fooled themselves into thinking they were not being influenced by bad company.
 
beware of putting yourself in the near occasion of sin. no one can make these decisions for you, but many have fooled themselves into thinking they were not being influenced by bad company.
As much as we’d like to pretend otherwise, if you “limit your friendship to just fellow Catholics,” you may still have some bad influences. We’d like to say we Catholics are never a near occasion of sin to each other, but that simply isn’t true. The truth is, your non-Catholic friends are actually more likely to tolerate what you say about your faith if it is in opposition to what they think than a Catholic is, because non-Catholics don’t have a Catholic identity to defend. While there are things in a true Catholic friend that no one outside the Church could duplicate–no one here is disputing the value of cultivating good friends in the Church!–there are also dangers that a Catholic friend can pose that someone outside the Church would also have a hard time duplicating.

If the poster had said, “Is it OK to limit your friendships to people who have a good influence on you?”, there would still be the question of what is meant by “limit your friendships,” but there would not be the concern of cutting off contact between Catholics and non-Catholic persons of good will. I hope that most of us listen to your caution to avoid thinking we are above being influenced by associations with those who love vice, and take it very seriously.

“Is it a good idea to cultivate friendships with strong Catholics?” Absolutely. Just be careful that you don’t let your charity towards non-Catholics cool as a result of your pursuit of the good influence of saintly people. That would defeat the whole purpose of strengthening connections within the Body of Christ, which is to truly advance in virtue and advance in converting souls to Christ.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top