Is it OK to whisper to the minister during communion?

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Among_Strangers

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DW has celiac’s and she is usually in front of me when we present for communion. On more than one occasion I have noticed the minister distributing the consecrated host give her the hairy eye ball as she by-passes and goes to partake from the cup. This past Sunday it was one of our permanent deacons not an EMHC.

Would it be appropriate for me in these instances to whisper to the minister, “She has celiac disease”? Or do I just let the ministers continue to glare?
 
I just let them give me the hairy eye ball. :bigyikes:

It really only happens to me when I am visiting another parish. It seems like everyone here knows.

She may want to talk to her priest about it. Since he can talk to her about a low-gluten host, if she is interested. She should also make a small bow before she passes the Host.

Otherwise, let them give her the hairy eye ball.
 
I don’t think you have to whisper to the minister - it only creates more distraction for others. It is a normal reaction that people would stare when they think she was going to receive the Host. It happened at a mass where I attended, but people wouldn’t think much of it. I am sure the minister would know after few seconds of thinking.
 
Among_Strangers said:
DW has celiac’s and she is usually in front of me when we present for communion. On more than one occasion I have noticed the minister distributing the consecrated host give her the hairy eye ball as she by-passes and goes to partake from the cup. This past Sunday it was one of our permanent deacons not an EMHC.

Would it be appropriate for me in these instances to whisper to the minister, “She has celiac disease”? Or do I just let the ministers continue to glare?
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I would probably explain it to the pastor. Now, can’t she just maze around the pew and get to the line where the Precious Blood is distributed? That might be a workable solution. But, in either case, tell the pastor so that he can make a point of informing whoever needs to know. He doesn’t have to use names, just say something like this:

“Please do not be alarmed if you see someone line up for Communoin and not receive from you. These individuals have a condition that prevents them from receiving the Sacred Host. They are able, however, to receive the Precoius Blood.”

The only time I remember whispering something during Holy Communion was when my parochial vicar forgot to consecrate the Precious Blood. I was the last one in line (on purpose) and stopped him before he gave me Communion to inform him. He thanked me and then gave me the Body of Christ. There were extrenuating circumstances as to why this ommission occured, but, he corrected it right away.
 
We have a number of kids at our parish with the wheat allergies and celiac’s. Many of the families just avoid the whole mass as what I see using the “difficulty” as an easy excuse not to attend. One family has helped us find the gluten-free hosts, reports in with the priest or sacristan before mass and serves the host to her own kid. She puts the gluten-free host in a special pix and places it on the alter herself. During communion they line-up in the priest’s line and they do their thing. The kid has such strong reactions that they do not want anyone to touch the host and receiving the precious blood is out of the question because the cup has already been contaminated.
 
Among_Strangers said:
DW has celiac’s and she is usually in front of me when we present for communion. On more than one occasion I have noticed the minister distributing the consecrated host give her the hairy eye ball as she by-passes and goes to partake from the cup. This past Sunday it was one of our permanent deacons not an EMHC.

Would it be appropriate for me in these instances to whisper to the minister, “She has celiac disease”? Or do I just let the ministers continue to glare?
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Why not inform the priest and ask him to pass this info to the EMHC’s --that there will at least one that is not able to receive the Host. I don’t know if this made known to the EMHC’s in their training --but they need to be aware that not all are able to receive the Host.
 
maryjk said:
I just let them give me the hairy eye ball. :bigyikes:

It really only happens to me when I am visiting another parish. It seems like everyone here knows.

She may want to talk to her priest about it. Since he can talk to her about a low-gluten host, if she is interested. She should also make a small bow before she passes the Host.

Otherwise, let them give her the hairy eye ball.
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Yeah we have some of the super low gluten hosts in the freezer. A lady who also has celiac’s gave her some of hers. But DW doesn’t like the spot light situation where she has to go up first before everyone to receive the special host. She would rather go up with everyone else and just partake in the cup.
 
I’m floored that this is not a routine part of training for EMHCs. They should be very well aware of the possible reasons a person may not receive under one or the other forms.

And besides the training - why in the world would anyone take it personally that someone is not receiving from THEM? :confused:

Dang - some folks need to get over themselves and realize Holy Communion is not about them - it is about Him. :rolleyes:

~Liza
 
Among_Strangers said:
DW has celiac’s and she is usually in front of me when we present for communion. On more than one occasion I have noticed the minister distributing the consecrated host give her the hairy eye ball as she by-passes and goes to partake from the cup. This past Sunday it was one of our permanent deacons not an EMHC.

Would it be appropriate for me in these instances to whisper to the minister, “She has celiac disease”? Or do I just let the ministers continue to glare?
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I would let the Pastor know, and ask him to let the Deacons and EMHC know that there are people who do not receive the Host for medical reasons. They do not need to know exactly why or who they are. This is actually something that should have been included in their training or should be brought up during their on-going Formation in the ministry…
 
I’d call the pastor and express my concern. Also to ask him how should she be going about presenting herself for communion.
How are things set up at your parish? Should she not be on the line for receiving the host? Is she forgetting to make a sign of reverence?
 
Wow, what a rude bunch of people!
As long as the person being discussed doesn’t act disrespectful anywhere, someone should keep their hairy eyeball to themselves!!
 
Among_Strangers said:
DW has celiac’s and she is usually in front of me when we present for communion. On more than one occasion I have noticed the minister distributing the consecrated host give her the hairy eye ball as she by-passes and goes to partake from the cup. This past Sunday it was one of our permanent deacons not an EMHC.

Would it be appropriate for me in these instances to whisper to the minister, “She has celiac disease”? Or do I just let the ministers continue to glare?
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Among Strangers,

On the one hand, it’s no one else’s business when it comes to matters of someone’s health conditions. But on the other hand, if the deacon or EMHC feels insulted, charity might call for some explanation. In other words, they don’t have a right to know about the condition itself, but I think they have a certain “right” to know that your intention is not to insult them only because some rare people do in fact engage in this activity as a form of insult.

To answer your last question directly though, you shouldn’t whisper that to the person during Communion. After Mass in a private setting might be appropriate though.
 
Among_Strangers said:
DW has celiac’s and she is usually in front of me when we present for communion. On more than one occasion I have noticed the minister distributing the consecrated host give her the hairy eye ball as she by-passes and goes to partake from the cup. This past Sunday it was one of our permanent deacons not an EMHC.

Would it be appropriate for me in these instances to whisper to the minister, “She has celiac disease”? Or do I just let the ministers continue to glare?
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It’s not their business.

I do not think it is appropriate for you to say something to the priest/deacon/EMHC during Communion.

Perhaps a phone call to the priest at another time encouraging him to train the deacons/EMHC in this regard.
 
Among_Strangers said:
DW has celiac’s and she is usually in front of me when we present for communion. On more than one occasion I have noticed the minister distributing the consecrated host give her the hairy eye ball as she by-passes and goes to partake from the cup. This past Sunday it was one of our permanent deacons not an EMHC.

Would it be appropriate for me in these instances to whisper to the minister, “She has celiac disease”? Or do I just let the ministers continue to glare?
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Perhaps you should discuss this with DW before you take any action.
 
Among_Strangers said:
Yeah we have some of the super low gluten hosts in the freezer. A lady who also has celiac’s gave her some of hers. But DW doesn’t like the spot light situation where she has to go up first before everyone to receive the special host. She would rather go up with everyone else and just partake in the cup.
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This is what we do:
The Priest has them. He consecrates them along with the other Hosts. BUT in a separate Pyx. He then places that pyx in the Ciborium(sp?). When I present myself for Communion, he brushes his fingers off, (think of what you do to show money, then turn your fingers upside down)over the Ciborium, then opens my Pyx, I receive, then he closes it. No one knows that is happening. I do generally sit in the front pew, so I am one of the first to receive. But I do not go up before anyone.

I do have to say, two years ago, I would have never received a low gluten host. I just knew it would make me sick or the Priest would mess up somehow or it would really call attention to what I was doing. But we have been doing this for over a year, and we haven’t had a slip yet.
 
Thanks to all 🙂

Our parish is pretty big and the people that have special needs for communion come up first. When the presider has distributed to the deacon, the deacon takes care of the special needs folks (both the ones that come up first or if there are other people that are impaired; wheel chairs, etc.), then the rest present. There aren’t separate lines for the hosts and the cup. The ministers with the cup stand a little to one side of the ministers with the host. So, the idea of just getting into the right line from the get go doesn’t really apply, unfortunately because that would be nice and easy. DW doesn’t really see the hairy eyeball; I do because I am next in line behind her. While the minister with the host is busy giving her the hair eyeball I am just standing there waiting for him or her to come back to center and do their job (sorry, not trying to sound snarky, but that’s sort of the way it goes). I guess it’s me with the problem because it just annoys me. I have not told DW about it because I don’t want her to be self conscious or to be annoyed that people are giving her the hairy eyeball. Several weeks ago the minister of the cup said to her, “Didn’t you forget something,” and gestured with her head to the other minister with the host. DW said, “I have Celiac’s,” and the lady looked at her like she had 3 heads and then after several very long and awkward seconds presented her with the cup. This incident didn’t sit well so, I have not remarked at my witnessing the hairy eyeball from others. No reason to stir the nest.

I guess I should talk to the pastor, or should just not get annoyed, problem solved either way! 😃

p.s. please don’t take me wrong I love our parish
 
Among_Strangers said:
Thanks to all 🙂

Our parish is pretty big and the people that have special needs for communion come up first. When the presider has distributed to the deacon, the deacon takes care of the special needs folks (both the ones that come up first or if there are other people that are impaired; wheel chairs, etc.), then the rest present. There aren’t separate lines for the hosts and the cup. The ministers with the cup stand a little to one side of the ministers with the host. So, the idea of just getting into the right line from the get go doesn’t really apply, unfortunately because that would be nice and easy. DW doesn’t really see the hairy eyeball; I do because I am next in line behind her. While the minister with the host is busy giving her the hair eyeball I am just standing there waiting for him or her to come back to center and do their job (sorry, not trying to sound snarky, but that’s sort of the way it goes). I guess it’s me with the problem because it just annoys me. I have not told DW about it because I don’t want her to be self conscious or to be annoyed that people are giving her the hairy eyeball. Several weeks ago the minister of the cup said to her, “Didn’t you forget something,” and gestured with her head to the other minister with the host. ** DW said, “I have Celiac’s,” and the lady looked at her like she had 3 heads and then after several very long and awkward seconds presented her with the cup. ** This incident didn’t sit well so, I have not remarked at my witnessing the hairy eyeball from others. No reason to stir the nest.

I guess I should talk to the pastor, or should just not get annoyed, problem solved either way! 😃

p.s. please don’t take me wrong I love our parish
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If the EMHC is not familiar with the condition – it could lead to the reaction you described. It may have been rolling around in the EMHC’s head–what in the world is Celiacs --and what does it have to do with receiving the Host. I believe you should bring it up to the priest’s attention --so he can explain to the EMHC’s --that not all are able to receive the Host because of this.
 
FrDavid96 said:
In other words, they don’t have a right to know about the condition itself,
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I don’t see it as a problem that EMHC’s and Eucharistic Ministers know what some of the conditions are that people in general might not receive the host. I think EMHC’s and Eucharistic Ministers should have training that there are circumstances someone might not receive the host just to prevent situations such as described above from occuring.

I don’t think that they need to know why in individual situations, but by knowing that these situations exist, it will help prevent EMHC’s or Eucharistic Ministers from wondering what’s going on when a particular individual individual skips the host.

As an EMHC myself, by knowing such situations exist, I know to never react if someone were to skip the host and come to the Blood if I were ministering the Chalice.

And to the OP: In any event, the EMHC’s and Eucharistic ministers should know that it is the choice of any Catholic which or both of the Sacred Species they will receive. I personally am able to receive the host, but it would be completely licit for me or anyone else to skip the host and commune by Blood alone out of simple personal preference.
 
AHapka said:
I don’t see it as a problem that EMHC’s and Eucharistic Ministers know what some of the conditions are that people in general might not receive the host. I think EMHC’s and Eucharistic Ministers should have training that there are circumstances someone might not receive the host just to prevent situations such as described above from occuring.

I don’t think that they need to know why in individual situations, but by knowing that these situations exist, it will help prevent EMHC’s or Eucharistic Ministers from wondering what’s going on when a particular individual individual skips the host.

As an EMHC myself, by knowing such situations exist, I know to never react if someone were to skip the host and come to the Blood if I were ministering the Chalice.

And to the OP: In any event, the EMHC’s and Eucharistic ministers should know that it is the choice of any Catholic which or both of the Sacred Species they will receive. I personally am able to receive the host, but it would be completely licit for me or anyone else to skip the host and commune by Blood alone out of simple personal preference.
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AHapka,
We’re saying the same thing. My opening remarks were merely to make the point that an individual person’s health is a confidential matter. I wasn’t trying to say that EMHCs don’t have a right to know what celiac’s disease is, or what are the effects of the disease. Of course, they should know this, as well as be properly trained in what to do.

Perhaps, in hindsight, rather than say “they don’t have a right to know about the condition itself,” it would have been better to say “they don’t have a right to know that a particular person is afflicted with the condition.” But if you look again at the sentence within the context of the entire post, I’m sure you’ll see that we are saying the same thing.
 
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