Is it okay to pray for death?

[matt1917]

These feelings sound a lot like what I was going through about this time last year. My priest also told me that such feelings (despair, self-hatred, scrupulosity) are rooted in pride, and it took me quite a while to really understand what he meant.

The parts of your post that I underlined are the key. When you hate yourself, aren’t you thinking something along the lines of “I don’t like the way I am, and I should be better than this”? If so, that’s a double-dose of pride, because you’re saying 1) I shouldn’t have to experience this suffering and 2) God isn’t doing a very good job of planning things.

Not to downplay at all what you’re going through, because I remember clearly how awful it felt, but we’re all asked to carry a cross. This one appears to be yours, at least for right now. It seems to me that you’re having trouble accepting the fact that you’re imperfect. At least that was my problem… I was freaking out over my sins and panicking because I felt I wasn’t making “enough” progress. After reading a few wonderful books I’ve learned that I need to stop trying to change myself and allow God to change me. Not easy to do, because my pride continues to tell me that I should be in control of my salvation!

I would encourage you to read the following list if you’re able:

Abandonment to Divine Providence - (available free online because it’s so old ) ccel.org/ccel/decaussade/abandonment.html

Story of a Soul - The Autobiography of St. Therese of Liseux - (also free online ) ccel.org/ccel/therese/autobio.html

The Imitation of Christ - (guess how much it costs… ) ccel.org/ccel/kempis/imitation.html

Also, I have clinical depression and had to switch to a new anti-depressant, but the books and prayer were a bigger part of my recovery I would say.

Don’t give up.

Doesnt God expect effort from us and help those who help themselves?

I read those books you mentioned but never read the entire “imitation of Christ”.

 

[Catolico65]

Doesnt God expect effort from us and help those who help themselves.

Sometimes though we are not physically, emotionally nor spiritually able to “help ourselves” and need others to do it for us, such as Jesus Christ and who He sends to help out.

 

[Bataar]

As one who has nearly given up on this life, I can attest to what many people are saying. I feel God created me with a disability (Aspergers) that prevents me from having a “normal” life. I feel that praying for anything is pointless as I don’t feel God has done anything to help me. It just seems that the surest way to prevent something from happening is for me to pray that it happens. I remember a couple of years ago thinking that I should pray for Obama to be re-elected as a surefire way to get Romney voted in .

For those of us who are lost and have spent years struggling and asking God for assistance, only to get zero response, what options do we have? I can honestly say I have no hope and don’t feel I have any reason at all to have hope.

 

[Catolico65]

As one who has nearly given up on this life, I can attest to what many people are saying. I feel God created me with a disability (Aspergers) that prevents me from having a “normal” life. I feel that praying for anything is pointless as I don’t feel God has done anything to help me. It just seems that the surest way to prevent something from happening is for me to pray that it happens. I remember a couple of years ago thinking that I should pray for Obama to be re-elected as a surefire way to get Romney voted in .

For those of us who are lost and have spent years struggling and asking God for assistance, only to get zero response, what options do we have? I can honestly say I have no hope and don’t feel I have any reason at all to have hope.

First, sorry you feel this way and I know what you are going through.

Still, while I have been at times glad for God to take me from this world I do recognize that He has answered a lot of my prayers. Certainly, I’m not as perfect as I would like to be, am hardly able to pay my bills and have a sometimes difficult marriage but there is always something that makes up for it, if only by a little (my perception) so I’m able to hang on and not really despair except maybe dreaming of dying and going to heaven.

I also am quite familiar with Asbergers as I am friends with a person who suffers from it and know the difficulty they have in social situations. However, I can assure you God loves you and so do many of your fellow Catholics. Peace.