Is it the guy's job to do the asking?

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A lot of guys manage to communicate desperation too, it’s just seen as more normal so people don’t notice as quickly.
 
Cecilia_Dympna said:
Errmm no. The husband is not " supposed" to be anything other than a good husband and father. Woman are attracted to all kinds of fellas. I personally am not so keen on very confident fellas.
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Sometimes when people are super confident, it’s because they haven’t bothered to understand the situation.
 
Cecilia_Dympna said:
No one should be pursuing anyone. You ask someone out, if the answer is no you simply accept it.

Just because a behavior is the “norm” doesn’t mean it’s the only way to do something.
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I’m not suggesting that you chase after someone who isn’t interested. But sometimes you have to put in a bit of effort to woo the girl who is interested.
 
No, the husband is supposed to be the leader, the head of the household, the spiritual head of the household. That is the teaching of Holy Scripture and the Church.
 
exnihilo said:
No, the husband is supposed to be the leader, the head of the household, the spiritual head of the household. That is the teaching of Holy Scripture and the Church.
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So if he doesn’t go to church, the mom shouldn’t take the kids to Mass?

Or if he doesn’t take care of the household, the mom should just let the house rot and the kids run wild?

Sometimes it is more important that things get done than that a particular person does them.
 
Why would you think that? If a husband is derelict in his duty then of course the wife should step up. Dereliction doesn’t cause the duty to cease to be.
 
Lets recognise the culturally bound fundamentalism.
Whether Catholic, Baptist or shariah Muslim variety it seems to be a form of male insecurity we need to move past.
 
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By all means quote clearly where the CCC teaches the husband must be the head of the household both politically and spiritually.
 
From the Epistle to the Ephesians, ‘for the husband is the head of the wife’. Of course like anything it must be properly understood. But those aren’t empty words from St. Paul.
 
It is odd. But it remains the constant teaching of the Catholic Church.
 
Sane conversation is not possible if you merely just assert such perennial teaching from the depth of your own mistaken emotion but cannot actually find it in the CCC.
God bless.
 
When I was 16 I worked up the courage to ask a guy out. Bought tickets to a concert. He accepted, then, stood me up. That was 35 years ago, I still remember how that felt.

It is not a hard and fast rule, but, if someone works up the courage to ask you, have the courage to turn them down if you really do not want to go.

Courtesy is far more important than who asks whom.
 
No, in fact it is unreasonable to assert that every teaching must be found exhaustively in the catechism. The catechism is great but it isn’t all there is to Catholicism. If it were then we could stop reading Scripture, get rid of Canon Law, and stop having homilies.
 
Xantippe said:
Sometimes when people are super confident, it’s because they haven’t bothered to understand the situation.
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It’s also got the old problem that if the woman has no intention at all of being involved with the guy, confidence doesn’t always end well. Sometimes being really confident that you’re going to get the girl goes really badly if the girl doesn’t want to be gotten.
 
DarkLight said:
It’s also got the old problem that if the woman has no intention at all of being involved with the guy, confidence doesn’t always end well. Sometimes being really confident that you’re going to get the girl goes really badly if the girl doesn’t want to be gotten.
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And sometimes it works perfectly. And the girl does want to be gotten.
 
AdamP88 said:
And sometimes it works perfectly. And the girl does want to be gotten.
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I don’t think we’re saying “confidence is a bad thing,” but “confidence has to be combined with realism.” Sheer confidence that you’re going to get a girl doesn’t matter - it has to be combined with a good sense of whether you have a chance or not, when you’re going to come across as romantic and when as just annoying. And there’s no magic formula that’s going to make every girl interested, so you have to pay attention to the lady you’re dealing with.

Confidence is a good thing, but it should be kept within the bounds of reason. And unfortunately some men don’t really know the difference between romantically pursuing a woman who’s impressed by effort, and annoying a woman who doesn’t want to get involved with them.
 
Yeah but sometimes confidence can actually make a girl who’s neutral or even not particularly interested a bit more interested and give a better chance of actually breaking the ice. Perhaps that’s a turn off for some women, but it tends to be true in general.
 
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