Is it time............

[melissa09]

Well, what if people who are working up the courage to confess mortal sin get so flustered by the priest or other parishioners hurrying them along that they decide to leave them out? Bad pastoral practice either way.

If someone urgently needs to go, they’ll make an appointment if they can’t get in at the scheduled time. Most priests wouldn’t just turn someone away, they’d tell them to make an appointment.

Otherwise confession takes as long as it takes, and I’m sorry, advice of one kind or another - ie advice - is actually SUPPOSED to be part of the sacrament, at least occasionally!

Priests aren’t just robots meant to hear about your sins, offer no advice or other help and just pronounce absolution. No point having a priest there if that’s all he ever does.

Neither are penitents just robots meant to rattle off a list of sins at as-high-as-possible speed. No point them being there if that’s their attitude to it either.

Seriously, you guys want the sacrament to be run like the queue at a McDonalds or something - it isn’t and shouldn’t be.

just what I was saying:thumbsup:

 

[SwizzleStick]

I refuse to deprive my children of the grace received through the Sacrament of Reconciliation because of logistics. In my humble opinion, time still needs to be shown a proper respect somehow when an entire community is involved.

I’m not sure who you are addressing with the above post, but I think it might be me. I missed in your earlier post that your children also go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation too when you go when I suggested you leave them home when you go (when I read “young children” I thought younger children than those old enough to go to Confession themselves), but I’ve since re-read your post and now know that your children too go to Confession when you go. I’m sorry for overlooking that initially.

With that being said, I don’t think it is asking too much that your children wait in line to take their turn just like everyone else since they are old enough to do so (and especially if it is only once or twice a year, since so many Catholics only go that often now), unless someone offers their own place, of course. When I was a kid, my whole family went together each month and the six of us stood in line, waited for all confessions and penances and it took as long as it took.

I guess I don’t quite see the problem. Shouldn’t we all rejoice that more people in our faith community are reaping the benefits and grace of receiving the Sacrament of Reconciliation? If you look at it as your broader Catholic community and family reaping the benefits of this sacrament and not just your own individual Catholic family, perhaps that will help make it easier for you to wait?

 

[MrsMeganMc]

As someone who is studying for the priesthood, I plan to never turn any one away from confession but I also plan to never tell someone to “speed” it up.

I really appreciate your awareness of what the priesthood is about.

Agreed. Thank you!

 

[kage_ar]

No, No. (Sorry if I misled you in any way!) It’s a Reconciliation event (just like others have described here & on other threads): public prayers first, time for examine, etc. Then individual confessions, face-to-face, privately, at individual visible “stations” throughout the church. (Various “corners” of this mostly non-cornered, open-space church, which is also large.) Lines obviously do not come within true hearing of the content of anyone’s confession.

Depending on the size of the crowd, there could be 6-12 priests involved.

(Don’t think there would be any problem with “lines” if the confessions were public. Not many takers, probably, except a handful of saints. )

You were clear. People are expected to confess in front of other people. Visible stations - confession is to be private. Standing in front of other people - even if those people are “out of earshot” takes away the privacy of Confession.

This parish does not have classrooms or offices that can be used so the confession is done properly?

 

[SwizzleStick]

If people would take advantage of the regularly scheduled confession times in their parish, then Lent/Advent Penance Services would be unnecessary, and perhaps your desire to reduce the time per penitent would fade.

Yes, I agree that going every couple of weeks throughout the year may reduce the long lines that form during Lent/Advent penance services, though I also understand that we must insure we adequately ready ourselves during Advent/Lent for Christmas/Easter as well. Maybe we’d just end up with long lines all the time that way, if most Catholics went every few weeks, but I think that would be a wonderful thing that many would partake of the grace and healing of this lovely sacrament! .

 

[kage_ar]

No, No. (Sorry if I misled you in any way!) It’s a Reconciliation event (just like others have described here & on other threads): public prayers first, time for examine, etc. Then individual confessions, face-to-face, privately, at individual visible “stations” throughout the church. (Various “corners” of this mostly non-cornered, open-space church, which is also large.) Lines obviously do not come within true hearing of the content of anyone’s confession.

Depending on the size of the crowd, there could be 6-12 priests involved.

(Don’t think there would be any problem with “lines” if the confessions were public. Not many takers, probably, except a handful of saints. )

From reading the Canon Law, it would seem that there should be at minimum a screen -

Can. 964 §1 The proper place for hearing sacramental confessions is a church or oratory.
§2 As far as the confessional is concerned, norms are to be issued by the Episcopal Conference, with the proviso however that confessionals, which the faithful who so wish may freely use, are located in an open place, and fitted with a fixed grille between the penitent and the confessor.
§3 Except for a just reason, confessions are not to be heard elsewhere than in a confessional

 

[Friar_David_O.Carm]

You were clear. People are expected to confess in front of other people. Visible stations - confession is to be private. Standing in front of other people - even if those people are “out of earshot” takes away the privacy of Confession.

This parish does not have classrooms or offices that can be used so the confession is done properly?

I understand what you are saying here. That even though you can not hear what is being said that still being in a visible location removes the feeling of being in private but let me ask this. Does not waiting in line for confession also remove the feeling of being private? After all everyone in line or who sees the line knows that you are going to confession.

I believe that some of the reasons for the idea behind doing confession in this manner fall to the sex abuse scandal and the fear of some priests to be alone with someone especially of the opposite sex of with a child.

 

[Elizabeth502]

To Brother David & SwizzleStick:

Certainly, confession should always additionally be offered, or minimally be offered, in canonical format: anonymity, etc. (OTOH, if you’re in line at a traditional confessional, people do know where you’re going, & that there is presumptively sin on your mind. )

I think the point is that the public aspect of it, as well as multiple priests, is a different, supplemental kind of confession experience. Some people actually prefer strictly this format.

Heavens, as one who has been advocating for more frequent routine confession rather than infrequent mega-events solely, the last thing I would want would be reconciliation events to replace individual, ordinary opportunities.

This particular church has regular, weekly, Saturday confession times, every Saturday. Private. Not by appointment. The penitent can choose to be seen or not seen.

Hope that clarifies.

Again, at yet 2 other churches in my region (also with a large following, like this one, & also with regular traditional confessions every week – one of them many times a week), there are alternate Reconciliation events in lent & advent. They are combined with prayerful, meditative days or evenings which include much more than the sacrament, but do conclude or give all-day opportunities for the sacrament simultaneously. One can look upon them as mini-retreats. Also, some people seem to need to be “immersed” more, particularly if they are not immersing themselves regularly anyway.

 

[zab]

Certainly there are cases when people need extra time. But what is so bad about asking people to be considerate of those waiting in line when it is not necessary to take up so much time?

That is your opinion which you are free to have. I can not read people’s minds, I can only go by what is posted here.

From what I have read it seems that there are many who seem to think some people take to long in the confessional and that those who do so are 1) inconsiderate and/or 2) wasting time with social talk. They seem to think that those who “take too much time” are not doing so for valid reasons. I come to that conclusion by the choice of words used, “take too much time”, specifically those underlined.

But if I am misunderstanding what someone is saying, then please would that person clear it up.

As someone who is studying for the priesthood, I plan to never turn any one away from confession but I also plan to never tell someone to “speed” it up.

You may not plan to turn someone away but how will you know? -I’m not saying that 20 plus minutes is never needed, but how do you know that time is never misused? All that is being suggested is to consider not taking up too much time when it is not necessary especially when there is a long line of people waiting.

 

[Elizabeth502]

and for further clarification,

In all the churches in my area, absolutely none of them have instituted these public days for transparency reasons. They are there to answer spiritual demands, not legal concerns. Nor have the private confessionals at the 3 churches in question been adapted with glass, etc.

The 4th church – the ultra-traditional parish I go to (which mostly relies on frequent daily private confession) has confessional boxes dark as night, inside & outside.

I think the initial thinking behind the Days of Reconciliation, esp. for these large parishes, was to capture as many penitents as possible, by making it more “comfortable,” more “shared,” more “open,” less ‘scary,’ and providing lots of priests as well. I’m not suggesting anything about the content or instructions about any of those resultant confessions (in fact, my best confession in recent memory was at one of those). Not suggesting that the priests are “going soft” on the attendees in order to encourage participation, but that for many people who confess infrequently, seeing lots of people gives them more “permission.” (Maybe.)

 

[quiet52]

to consider putting time limits on Confession? I went to a beautiful Advent Penance Service recently at my parish. The reflection and readings were apt and moving. They lasted 20 minutes. When I went to the Confession lines with 2 young children, it took an hour and a half. I want the children to respect the Sacrament of Reconciliation and its appropriateness in our lives. While waiting I began thinking about the procedure. Couldn’t families, especially with young children, go first? At the most our Confession took from 5 to 10 minutes each. Then when all the families have gone, then all the extremely sinful old ladies can go who must go on and on for 20-25 minutes.

QUOTE]

You claim to want your children to respect the Sacrament of Reconciliation and its appropriateness in our lives. Then I suggest that you bring them monthly.

Many parishes schedule penitential services with private confessions during their Advent or Lenten “mission nights.” I hope you’re not raising your children to believe that confession is only available during these times.

As for expecting that families with children be “served” first – please be careful about raising your children with a sense of entitlement.

I hope you didn’t complain about the long lines within earshot of your children. If so, you minimized the opportunity to help them appreciate the sacrament. They will remember its “inconvenience” rather than their need for it.

 

[Desert_Dancer]

We need priests, not a timer.

Ironically Yours, Blade and Blood

Yikes, well said. When I am in line with my kids next time, I will pray for more priests, and encourage my kids to do the same.

 

[Desert_Dancer]

That is your opinion which you are free to have. I can not read people’s minds, I can only go by what is posted here.

From what I have read it seems that there are many who seem to think some people take to long in the confessional and that those who do so are 1) inconsiderate and/or 2) wasting time with social talk. They seem to think that those who “take too much time” are not doing so for valid reasons. I come to that conclusion by the choice of words used, “take too much time”, specifically those underlined.

But if I am misunderstanding what someone is saying, then please would that person clear it up.

As someone who is studying for the priesthood, I plan to never turn any one away from confession but I also plan to never tell someone to “speed” it up.

I will pray for you while I’m waiting for Confession!

 

[Aramis]

of the 23 Catholic churches united by Rome, many do not use confessionals at all.

In my home parish, the priest invites us into the sanctuary, standing where one can be seen with the deacon doors open. confession is made standing in view of the parish, but out of earshot. Absolution is public and visible. (Especially when the stole’s end gets placed upon one’s head… which is done only for the absolution.)

 

[SwizzleStick]

To Brother David & SwizzleStick:

Certainly, confession should always additionally be offered, or minimally be offered, in canonical format: anonymity, etc. (OTOH, if you’re in line at a traditional confessional, people do know where you’re going, & that there is presumptively sin on your mind. )

I think the point is that the public aspect of it, as well as multiple priests, is a different, supplemental kind of confession experience. Some people actually prefer strictly this format.

Heavens, as one who has been advocating for more frequent routine confession rather than infrequent mega-events solely, the last thing I would want would be reconciliation events to replace individual, ordinary opportunities. …

Elizabeth502, I’m not sure why you directed your post #88 above (partial shown) to me (and Brother David)? I realize additional penance services are offered during Advent and Lent in addition to the regular weekly times and anytime by appointment of the Sacrement of Reconciliation at most parishes. I guess I missed something somewhere? I do think it would be a wonderful reversion to old ways if most Catholics chose to go to Confession much more frequently, perhaps every few weeks or once a month, instead of choosing to go only once or twice a year as some do. That would be a wonderful development for our entire Catholic community and grace would surely abound for us and our brothers and sisters in Christ should that be the case!

 

[SwizzleStick]

You claim to want your children to respect the Sacrament of Reconciliation and its appropriateness in our lives. Then I suggest that you bring them monthly.

Many parishes schedule penitential services with private confessions during their Advent or Lenten “mission nights.” I hope you’re not raising your children to believe that confession is only available during these times.

As for expecting that families with children be “served” first – please be careful about raising your children with a sense of entitlement.

I hope you didn’t complain about the long lines within earshot of your children. If so, you minimized the opportunity to help them appreciate the sacrament. They will remember its “inconvenience” rather than their need for it.

These are good points, all.

 

[zab]

These are good points, all.

I disagree. Penance Services are meant for everyone. It was not necessary to suggest that the OP take his children monthly- How do you know he doesn’t already? Being patient, charitable and nonjudgemental goes both ways.

 

[SwizzleStick]

You claim to want your children to respect the Sacrament of Reconciliation and its appropriateness in our lives. Then I suggest that you bring them monthly.

Many parishes schedule penitential services with private confessions during their Advent or Lenten “mission nights.” I hope you’re not raising your children to believe that confession is only available during these times.

As for expecting that families with children be “served” first – please be careful about raising your children with a sense of entitlement.

I hope you didn’t complain about the long lines within earshot of your children. If so, you minimized the opportunity to help them appreciate the sacrament. They will remember its “inconvenience” rather than their need for it.

These are good points, all.

I disagree. Penance Services are meant for everyone. It was not necessary to suggest that the OP take his children monthly- How do you know he doesn’t already? Being patient, charitable and nonjudgemental goes both ways.

Okay, you disagree, but I don’t know how the points made above by quiet52 are bad points.

I think it would be wonderful for every Catholic to go to Confession monthy. If the OP does that and takes his children, it is a wonderful grace for all of them. I do not see how pointing out that the Sacrament of Reconciliation is available year round, not just during Advent and Lent, and suggesting that one go monthly is uncharitable. It is a good point.

The OP did state that he thought it would be good if families with children could go to confession in front of others. I think that while that might not quite be having a sense of entitlement, I do not see why the OP feels we should change the “first come, first served” basis that has existed for as long as I can remember (except on an as-needed basis with elderly, handicapped and/or ill parishioners). I have two children old enough to go to Confession myself and I wouldn’t dream of doing anything but have them wait their turn with me (in the summertime when they do not go to Confession at school, for example), so I think this is a good point.

Too, I think it is a good thing to realize that we are all in need of spiritual healing and God’s grace and forgiveness. We should seek it and do what is necessary to find it during the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Waiting in line for a while and conveying that it is inconvenient to do so to one’s children may not help them realize that they are in need of this sacrament on a regular basis. Quiet52 did not say that the OP did this, but he did make a valid point in simply stating that we should teach our children the value of this sacrament without worrying about the “convenience” of seeking it out.

If you feel I was impatient, uncharitable and judgemental in simply saying that quiet52 made valid points, I do not understand. The Sacrament of Reconciliation is SO wonderful, I would like all to take part in it fully and well and frequently. I do apologize if I offended anyone with the statement that quiet52 made valid points.

 

[SwizzleStick]

One of my posts dated 6/7/08, from another thread, “Have you ever had an awesome Confession experience?”:

I LOVE going to confession. Well, not going, but I love the way I feel after I go. I love that I feel forgiven and loved and renewed and right with our Lord again. I love the healing and the wonderful feeling of having a clean slate, of being at peace, of receiving grace. I think it is just an AWESOME sacrament and just wonderful. I often tear up as I say my Act of Contrition, knowing that my Lord loves me so much and is such a forgiving Father, that I am not good, but because of His goodness, I can be forgiven of the things I’ve done, the things I’ve failed to do. AND, that forgiveness is available to anyone who repents of his/her sins and goes to confession. That is just absolutely awesome and an awesome experience every time!

 

[kage_ar]

of the 23 Catholic churches united by Rome, many do not use confessionals at all.

In my home parish, the priest invites us into the sanctuary, standing where one can be seen with the deacon doors open. confession is made standing in view of the parish, but out of earshot. Absolution is public and visible. (Especially when the stole’s end gets placed upon one’s head… which is done only for the absolution.)

And if I were seeking the sacrament in your Parish or one of a similar Church, I would expect that.

The latin rite has private confession as a general rule, so, one would expect the Latin Churches to have a screen and privacy