Is it wrong to call a Priest "Sir"?

[CHalley57]

I work for the Knights of Columbus as a field agent, and I was talking to a Priest and when we were finished I said “thank you SIR” it was ment with respect. He told me I should be calling him (and all Priests) Father, not Sir. He had noticed my doing it in the past and felt he did not want to make a big thing out of it, but I should stop doing it.

So my question is; Did I really do something wrong, or is he being over sensitive? He is a new Priest only ordained about 18 months. Both of the times I remember calling him SIR were one on one conversations, not in a group.

 

[TEPO]

I work for the Knights of Columbus as a field agent, and I was talking to a Priest and when we were finished I said “thank you SIR” it was ment with respect. He told me I should be calling him (and all Priests) Father, not Sir. He had noticed my doing it in the past and felt he did not want to make a big thing out of it, but I should stop doing it.

So my question is; Did I really do something wrong, or is he being over sensitive? He is a new Priest only ordained about 18 months. Both of the times I remember calling him SIR were one on one conversations, not in a group.

No, he’s not being over sensitive. I’ve never called a priest anything but father. No matter the age.

 

[DavidFilmer]

It is customary to call a priest “father” (ie, “thank you, father”), but I don’t think many priests would correct someone who calls him “sir.” It’s better than, “thanks, dood!”

 

[Ignatius]

I work for the Knights of Columbus as a field agent, and I was talking to a Priest and when we were finished I said “thank you SIR” it was ment with respect. He told me I should be calling him (and all Priests) Father, not Sir. He had noticed my doing it in the past and felt he did not want to make a big thing out of it, but I should stop doing it.

So my question is; Did I really do something wrong, or is he being over sensitive? He is a new Priest only ordained about 18 months. Both of the times I remember calling him SIR were one on one conversations, not in a group.

Sir is for lay people. For Ordained clergy, it is customary to recognize their office with the title, Father or reverend; Doctor can be used, if it applies. If you want something less formal, Padre is good,

 

[LoyalViews]

I assume you said “sir” just out of habit? Then you did nothing wrong at all! But, the is correct that as an ordained Priest, he is to be a should always be addressed as “Father” or the equivalent to. “Revend Father” “Father Vicar”…etc…, but Father is the ‘proper’ title. So just remember, that’s all

 

[Aelred_Minor]

Obviously you only meant to be respectful, and I think most priests would not have thought anything of it if you called them “sir”. Of course, many of the priests I’ve known personally were the sort who liked to be called by their first name, without even a “Father”.

I don’t think there’s anything at all wrong with calling priests “sir” in principle. I believe priests are sometimes called Dominus in Latin, which of course means “Lord”, which goes to show modern English conventions regarding this subject are simply that- modern English conventions.

Also, “sir” is derived from the Latin word senior, meaning “elder.” The word “priest” meanwhile is derived from the Greek word presbyteros which also means “elder”, so the root meaning of “sir” and “priest” are the same at least in the etymological sense. Not that it would be correct to say “thank you, priest”, but again that’s all convention.

In the future I’d try to remember to say “father” though, to avoid inadvertently seeming disrespectful to some people.

 

[tuscany]

**I don’t think your priest is being sensitive at all. He worked very hard for his title, and the correct title is " Father ". He was correcting you because the title “Sir” was incorrect. Yes you were being respectful, but you were not correct.

You wouldn’t call a Sister “Madame” would you ? **

 

[NeedImprovement]

On this one, it helps if we know some of what it is based on - if we have some background on why we do call priests “Father” :

Below is an excerpt from Pope Pius XII’s Apostolic Exhortation MENTI NOSTRAE (1950), which can be read in full at this link ewtn.com/library/PAPALDOC/P12CLERG.HTM (9highlights mine) :

Celibacy

1. The priest has as the proper field of his activity everything that pertains to the supernatural life, since it is he who promotes the increase of this supernatural life and communicates it to the Mystical Body of Jesus Christ. Consequently, it is necessary that he renounce “the things of the world,” in order to have care only for “the things of the Lord”.[30] And it is precisely because he should be free from preoccupation with worldly things to dedicate himself entirely to the divine service, that the Church has established the law of celibacy, thus making it ever more manifest to all peoples that the priest is a minister of God and the father of souls. By his law of celibacy, the priest, so far from losing the gift and duties of fatherhood, rather increases them immeasurably, for, although he does not beget progeny for this passing life of earth, he begets children for that life which is heavenly and eternal. "

Pope Paul VI also alludes to the spiritual fatherhood of priests and bishops in several places in his encyclical SACERDOTALIS CAELIBATUS (1967)

• an excerpt:

ROLE OF THE FAITHFUL

1. Priestly virtue is a treasure that belongs to the whole Church. It is an enrichment and a splendor above the ordinary, which redounds to the building up and the profit of the entire People of God. We wish therefore to address to all the faithful, Our children in Christ, an affectionate and urgent exhortation. We wish that they too feel responsible for the virtue of t ho se brothers of theirs who have undertaken the mission of serving them in the priesthood for the salvation of their souls. They should pray and work for priestly vocations; they should help priests wholeheartedly, with filial love and ready collaboration; they should have the firm intention of offering them the consolation of a joyous response to their pastoral labors. They should encourage these, their fathers in Christ, to overcome the difficulties of every sort which they encounter as they fulfill their duties, with entire faithfulness, to the edification of all. In a spirit of faith and Christian love, they should foster a deep respect and a delicate reserve in their dealings with priests, on account of their condition as men entirely consecrated to Christ and to the Church.

There’s another helpful article available through EWTN , written by Father William Saunders entitled WHY DO WE CALL PRIESTS ‘FATHER’ ?

 

[CHalley57]

**I don’t think your priest is being sensitive at all. He worked very hard for his title, and the correct title is " Father ". He was correcting you because the title “Sir” was incorrect. Yes you were being respectful, but you were not correct.

You wouldn’t call a Sister “Madame” would you ? **

Well now that you have made the example, I do have interaction with Sisters, and I probably have answered a question with Yes Mame.

And that is the context in which I was calling him Sir.

“Thank you Sir”
“Yes Sir”

I plan on being more observant, and politicly correct.

 

[LoyalViews]

Well now that you have made the example, I do have interaction with Sisters, and I probably have answered a question with Yes Mame.

And that is the context in which I was calling him Sir.

“Thank you Sir”
“Yes Sir”

I plan on being more observant, and politicly correct.

Emphasis.
NO NO NO!!! You do not need to be politically correct. If anything will ruin your mind, being politically correct will. You are Catholicly correct

 

[Chuck_Finley]

I work for the Knights of Columbus as a field agent, and I was talking to a Priest and when we were finished I said “thank you SIR” it was ment with respect. He told me I should be calling him (and all Priests) Father, not Sir. He had noticed my doing it in the past and felt he did not want to make a big thing out of it, but I should stop doing it.

So my question is; Did I really do something wrong, or is he being over sensitive? He is a new Priest only ordained about 18 months. Both of the times I remember calling him SIR were one on one conversations, not in a group.

That’s understandable, as all religions have their own customs. But what about someone like me, who doesn’t recognize priests as “fathers”. If he’s an elderly priest, should I call him sir?

My dad is eighty years old and still calls some men “sir” and most ladies “ma’am”. It’s something that’s been so ingrained into me that, even in my mid forties, I still can’t imagine not calling some people sir or ma’am. I still call my elders Mr or Mrs _____, too, but that’s another story.

But in my religion, I could not call a priest “father”. So what do I do if he falls into the “sir” category?

Aelred_Minor:

Generally, it’s most respectful to call people what it is customary for them to be called. For example, I don’t consider an Jewish rabbi my teacher, but I would still call them “rabbi.” Or I don’t believe that Anglican bishops have valid holy orders, but I’ll still call them bishops.

Similarly, you’ll notice that non-Catholic politicians always call the Pope “His Holiness.” It’s just not respectful to deny a person their customary titles because you disagree with them.

That’s sort of my point. I do want to be respectful, but my religion doesn’t allow me to use those titles in regard to men and, by calling a man “His Holiness”, wouldn’t that be dishonest if I didn’t believe any human being is holy? Wouldn’t it also be an implication that I agree with his beliefs?

 

[Aelred_Minor]

That’s understandable, as all religions have their own customs. But what about someone like me, who doesn’t recognize priests as “fathers”. If he’s an elderly priest, should I call him sir?

My dad is eighty years old and still calls some men “sir” and most ladies “ma’am”. It’s something that’s been so ingrained into me that, even in my mid forties, I still can’t imagine not calling some people sir or ma’am. I still call my elders Mr or Mrs _____, too, but that’s another story.

But in my religion, I could not call a priest “father”. So what do I do if he falls into the “sir” category?

Generally, it’s most respectful to call people what it is customary for them to be called. For example, I don’t consider an Jewish rabbi my teacher, but I would still call them “rabbi.” Or I don’t believe that Anglican bishops have valid holy orders, but I’ll still call them bishops.

Similarly, you’ll notice that non-Catholic politicians always call the Pope “His Holiness.” It’s just not respectful to deny a person their customary titles because you disagree with them.

 

[Kathryn_Ann]

Generally, it’s most respectful to call people what it is customary for them to be called. For example, I don’t consider an Jewish rabbi my teacher, but I would still call them “rabbi.” Or I don’t believe that Anglican bishops have valid holy orders, but I’ll still call them bishops.

Similarly, you’ll notice that non-Catholic politicians always call the Pope “His Holiness.” It’s just not respectful to deny a person their customary titles because you disagree with them.

Exactly! “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” is the tradition, meaning that we do things out of respect for other cultures and make it a practice to be aware of these things. Thus, we don’t call a Catholic Priest “Sir,” but call him “Father.”

Protestant visitors to the Vatican, “VIPS”, people of all good faith, when meeting the Holy Father address him as “Your Holiness.” as in the above example given by** Aelred Minor.** Journalists follow this example when speaking of him as “The Holy Father,” or “Pope Benedict the Sixteenth” etc. (or in print as Pope Benedict XVI."

While we are on the subject, :angel1:let’s clarify something regarding addressing protestant clergy, just to be al inclusive and grammatically savvy. I have heard this a number of times:

Example: Seeing the local minister nearby, a person says to another, “There goes the Reverend,” when what they should say is “There goes Reverend Farthingsworth,” or "There goes the minister, " or “There goes THE Reverend Farthingsworth.” Surprisingly, I saw examples of the above mistakes several times in the movie “Signs,” among other real- life examples such as “He’s our Reverend,” instead of the proper “He’s our minister, the Reverend Farthingsworth.”

Seeing him in person, it is correct to say “Good morning, Reverend Farthingsworth,” rather than “Hi, Reverend.” Often people will be heard to say “He is our Reverend,” when what they mean to say is “He is our minister,” or “He is our minister, the Reverend Farthingsworth.” (You may substitute “she,” if you like, for all those wanting to acknowledge that some protestants include the fair sex among their ordained clergy persons.)

I think it is always nice to act respectfully to people of all good cultures and faiths.:heaven: I’ve added “good” here, as there are, alas, some cultures whose basic political or social tenets may include obvious abuses of human rights. If pressed by chance to actually greet such a person, we have the right not to extend our hand nor to address them at all.

If writing something prepared for a journalistic review of such representatives, should they have a self- appointed title, we can choose quotation marks before and after whatever title is normally used, in order make our point known. I would use such a journalistic tactic when writing of the late "Reverend’ Jim Jones and the like, who was responsible for so many tragic deaths, although that choice would be a personal one. Language matters, and often makes possible a subtle allusion to another’s character that is a gentle but firm commentary.

Peace to all,:heaven::harp::grouphug:
Kathryn Ann