We don’t know all you’re going through and what you experience each day.
Being locked in that way of thinking is so destructive to you.
Life is really hard for a lot of us, but amongst other things, we do need to be aware of the physical things that affect our health and mental well-being, healthy diet, enough exercise, checking with a health/medical professional as to whether anything is out of balance or we need medication, and so on.
Stress, and stressing is bad for our health…I know if I allow stress to get to me, my autoimmune levels as much as double and my doctor starts murmuring about that the serious illness that is lurking in my genes. I’ve had a lot of tought stuff happen in my life and in the lives of people I care about…and sometimes it seems that my first experience of life was being dropped on the floor of the labor ward as a newborn, turned out to be a good indication that my life might be difficult!..
But, instead of remaining locked in the box of feeling trapped and miserable, we do need to do something about it, healthwise, and regarding how we talk about our lives and to ourselves in our thoughts.
I don’t know exactly what to say to you regarding your spiritual life, but perhaps a start would be to speak of your resentment of life in Confession.
The resentment is a kind of ingratitude to God and a denial of yourself as a loved child of God.
You mightn’t feel that you are, but it is true. Perhaps you could make a habit of finding some good, so little thing to be thankful for.
Another thing is regarding giving of our lives to others, not resentfully in the little kind things we do, but with kindness, even if at present the feelings arent there.
Just firing a few thoughts in case something said means something in your bruised and unhappy heart.
God bless you.
Please, God, you will find experience of His love for you, even in little things.
