Maybe you have just begun to learn what “doing good for yourself” really is. It ain’t acquiring wealth, I can tell you that.
The Scripture is: you cannot serve God and a mammon. Mammon is the pagan god of STUFF. Mostly money. So, you are being pulled away from God by… hmmmmm… could it be the Liar? The one who hates your growing Faith and would do anything to stop your soul from progressing one inch closer to God?
But the “type of guy” you were (are) is the one who needed more, who needed to find the Truth, the more, the REAL, the actual eternal, yes, you can take it with you, life in the Spirit.
Not really. I mean, sorry to pull age rank, but you’re a kid compared to me and I promise you that the last thing to make you happy in this world will be money.
Look. Maybe you’ll be here 70+ yrs. And maybe that hidden aneurysm in your abdominal aorta will give way in a couple hours. Point is, the longest time you spend here isn’t even an eyeblink compared to ETERNITY.
Go read the Gospels. All of them. Start at Mark and just read right through. Listen to Jesus. No one wants your total joy forever more than Jesus. He will tell you how to get that.
Hallelujah! Nothing better than a complete identity crisis! It means the Holy Spirit is working very hard in your life, you are being hugely blessed.
There is nothing more corrupting than power and money. No thought more twisted than “it’s mine because I earned it.” Nothing is yours. Your body isn’t yours. It all belongs to God.
Maybe, possibly, there will be some money in your future someday. Maybe God would like you to obtain and possess and use that without great danger to your soul, and so, right now, you need to be reformed. You=clay. God=potter.
And maybe, possibly, God can take that enormous energy and ambition and use you for His purposes. Maybe you’ll find a vocation.
I’m thinking Franciscan for you. Perfect fit. Real happiness.
Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose.