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mrsdizzyd
Guest
Wait a minute!!!
Your parents are divorced, but you want to wish them a happy 50th anniversary??? What in the world?!
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Your parents are divorced, but you want to wish them a happy 50th anniversary??? What in the world?!
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lilypadrees
Guest
Wrong. God brings people to salvation through His Son, Jesus. Whether the person is Catholic or not isn’t the issue.
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JulianN
Guest
And it appears their marriage was not valid to begin with … so I’m not sure what the OP’s concern is. His mother, at least, seems to no longer be in a problematic situation. His father, if he chooses to do so, could probably regularize his current marriage.
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Cruciferi
Guest
Have a Mass said. Don’t mention their Anniversary. If they have questions, direct them to the Diocese.
Pray for them but don’t expect a miraculous reconciliation.
Pray for them but don’t expect a miraculous reconciliation.
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rcwitness
Guest
That’s just not true. It’s a scandal to their children to openly live in an adulterous relationship.
The child must forgive, but also has a right to understand if the relationship is wrong.
The child must forgive, but also has a right to understand if the relationship is wrong.
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CilladeRoma
Guest
But if the couple does not believe that they are, indeed, sinning, they cannot cause scandal.
What happened in the past, is in the past. My advice OP is to just accept that your parents are not perfect (no one’s are), pray for them often and live your adult life the way you choose.
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rcwitness
Guest
Funny that Jesus doesn’t say that.
He simply says:
“Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and whoever marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery
He simply says:
“Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and whoever marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery
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TheLittleLady
Guest
Funny, that verse says nothing about scandalizing one’s children.
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1ke
Guest
No. You should not do something like this. It is completely inappropriate.
It does not appear that they were ever validly married. But of course, we may not have all the facts, so that is said with a caveat.
It’s not something to trouble yourself about. My parents were never validly married either. It has no bearing on me or my life.
This is between your father and his confessors. Since your mother is Lutheran, it’s between her and God.
It is my understanding from your subsequent posts that your father is married civilly again. You could encourage him to approach his pastor regarding making that marriage valid, or at least seeking advice from his pastor.
Beyond that, it’s not something you can or should take on as your responsibility. It’s not your place and it’s not something you have control over.
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1ke
Guest
The OP’s parents are not married to each other. They are civilly divorced. See post 1, last bullet point and some of the OP’s subsequent clarifications.
The mom and dad are divorced and the dad is married to someone else.
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mrsdizzyd
Guest
1857 For a sin to be mortal, three conditions must together be met: “Mortal sin is sin whose object is grave matter and which is also committed with full knowledge and deliberate consent.”
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rcwitness
Guest
Maybe you would be proud of your parents. You are not the norm.
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rcwitness
Guest
I didn’t accuse anyone of going to hell! What I said, is that it’s still adultery, no matter how ignorant someone may be.
Or rather Jesus did…
Or rather Jesus did…
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mrsdizzyd
Guest
The point is that in deciding they are scandalizing their children you assume that they know they are commiting adultery. You can make no such assumption.
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rcwitness
Guest
Actually, marriages (in this case, the first) are assumed to be valid until a tribunal declares they are not.
So, yes, adultery can be assumed. It’s up to the couple to first take their first marriage to the Church in order to be considered free to marry newly.
So, yes, adultery can be assumed. It’s up to the couple to first take their first marriage to the Church in order to be considered free to marry newly.
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mrsdizzyd
Guest
I didn’t say it wasn’t adulterous. I said you cannot assume the parents know it is adulterous.
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rcwitness
Guest
What difference does that make? It’s adultery, and brings shame on the children.rcwitness:
I didn’t say it wasn’t adulterous. I said you cannot assume the parents know it is adulterous.
What is also a shame, is that the Church lacks conviction over these relationships
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1ke
Guest
The OP’s mother had a marriage before the OP’s father. That, on its face, does have a presumption of validity.
The OP’s father, a Catholic who married outside of the Church without dispensation (twice, to the OP’s mother and now to someone else) has no presumption of validity for either of those marriages. There is no putative marriage in such a case.
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rcwitness
Guest
No disagreement there.rcwitness:
The OP’s mother had a marriage before the OP’s father. That, on its face, does have a presumption of validity.
The OP’s father, a Catholic who married outside of the Church without dispensation (twice, to the OP’s mother and now to someone else) has no presumption of validity for either of those marriages. There is no putative marriage in such a case.
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mrsdizzyd
Guest
It’s makes all the difference in the world! One cannot be guilty of mortal sin unless all three conditions are met.
Exteriorly, all we can say is that this is grave matter and that the species of that matter is adultery. The other two condition can only be known interiorly. Therefore, we cannot declare that the parents are guilty of scandal. You cannot know what is in the mind and heart of the parents.
Exteriorly, all we can say is that this is grave matter and that the species of that matter is adultery. The other two condition can only be known interiorly. Therefore, we cannot declare that the parents are guilty of scandal. You cannot know what is in the mind and heart of the parents.
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