Is something missing?

[Elefar]

Last Sunday our parish priest delivered a homily about confession. He covered examination of conscience, repentance, confession to a priest, act of contrition, and absolution. As I was listening, I began thinking something was missing which should have been covered. Aren’t we supposed to go and seek forgiveness from those against whom we have sinned? Healing our relationship with Almighty God is important, but so is making amends with people we have hurt.

 

[Bonnie]

Sometimes it isn’t a good idea, sometimes it’s impossible.

 

[Gertabelle]

I think that depends on the circumstances…

If seeking someone’s forgiveness can bring peace to someone, then by all means, seek it.

But if seeking someone’s forgiveness is for your sake – that is, if it’s really more about your feelings – then skip it and offer up prayers instead.

Just the two cents’ of a complete stranger on the internet

God bless you!

 

[Mary_Ellen]

IMHO the priest represents not only Jesus Christ (in persona Christi) but also His body here on earth, the Church. When we go to Confession we reconcile not only with God but with the community.

The priest, in his assignment of a penance, may impose some action which may help to heal or strengthen specific personal relationships but he cannot require a penitent to reveal his sin to another.

That seems to be what you are seeking - the revelation of a sin to someone other than the priest. As Gertabelle mentioned, seeking someone else’s forgiveness may bring peace or healing or it may make things worse, especially if the one who is at fault is seeking forgiveness for selfish reasons.

Scripture actually says to be reconciled with your brother - that could mean asking for OR granting forgiveness. Someone can have something against you for any number of reasons and sometimes those relationships can be healed and sometimes they cannot. Offering prayer for someone is sometimes the only thing you can do, after you’ve made a good confession if you are the one at fault in a sinful way.

You may want to bring your particular concerns to the priest in question. It sounds like he gave a pretty good homily and I’d bet this question could lead to a fruitful discussion between the two of you.

Be at peace.

 

[chimo]

Last Sunday our parish priest delivered a homily about confession. He covered examination of conscience, repentance, confession to a priest, act of contrition, and absolution. As I was listening, I began thinking something was missing which should have been covered. Aren’t we supposed to go and seek forgiveness from those against whom we have sinned? Healing our relationship with Almighty God is important, but so is making amends with people we have hurt.

Probably that is harder to do than you think. When Job of the Old Testament was hurt by those so called friends of his, these friends did not know they were sinning against Job. They thought they were doing a good deed! When God appeared on the scene, He unmasked these friends of Job and declared them wrong. But were the friends of Job acknowledging this? No they did not. They would not admit what they did was wrong. God praised Job for putting up with so much even with these so called friends so He asked Job to pray for them. God had forgiven them through the prayers of His Job who was willingly to do so. This is one of the ways when God will forgive those who will not ask it for themselves or they do not see what they do was wrong. When Job prayed for his friends it was then God lifted up Job’s sufferings as He cured Job. When someone hurts us and they do not see what they did was wrong and the revealing of the hurt will not do any good than it is better to pray and to forgive. For instance if the hurt was abuse of any kind than of course reveal it before the hurt will overcome you but if it is a lesser hurt just like those hurts which Job’s friends had given it might be better to pray and to forgive and leave it in the hands of God because certain people do not see what they do at times to be sinful.

 

[Beryllos]

He covered examination of conscience, repentance, confession to a priest, act of contrition, and absolution.

You (or he) left out penance.

Aren’t we supposed to go and seek forgiveness from those against whom we have sinned?

The penance may involve reparation. The Catechism teaches…
1459 Many sins wrong our neighbor. One must do what is possible in order to repair the harm (e.g., return stolen goods, restore the reputation of someone slandered, pay compensation for injuries). Simple justice requires as much. But sin also injures and weakens the sinner himself, as well as his relationships with God and neighbor. Absolution takes away sin, but it does not remedy all the disorders sin has caused. Raised up from sin, the sinner must still recover his full spiritual health by doing something more to make amends for the sin: he must “make satisfaction for” or “expiate” his sins. This satisfaction is also called “penance.”
Furthermore, in Matthew 5:23-24, Jesus tells the importance of reconciling with your brother (or neighbor):
Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar, and there recall that your brother has anything against you, leave your gift there at the altar, go first and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.

 

[ccmcmg]

In all of my numerous sins, not once has the priest advised me to make restitution or go to the person I have sinned against.

God’s Forgiveness supercedes all men’s forgiveness on earth, for all sins are ultimately against Him, above even our loved ones and neighbors.