Is the concept of Self esteem compatible with Catholicism/Christianity?

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Elena321

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These days,the notion of self esteem has become very popular and is taught to school students etc,but I have also read some Christians say that the concept of self esteem is not a Christian concept.
I think at very least,most people would be in agreement that low self esteem is bad?
 
i’d much prefer the old term “self respect”. If we don’t have that, we may as well lie down in the gutter and expire.

“Self-esteem” makes me sick: a relatively new PC term that’s puffed up/self-important!
In some quarters, there’s destructive emphasis on I/ME/SELF!😦
 
These days,the notion of self esteem has become very popular and is taught to school students etc,but I have also read some Christians say that the concept of self esteem is not a Christian concept.
I think at very least,most people would be in agreement that low self esteem is bad?
Like with any other concept that may or may not have been developed by a Christian but is certainly not a theological Christian concept (not every Christian has to be a full-time theologian; we need doctors and engineers too), it can be good or bad and its use can be good or bad.

Anything can be bad if it’s used in a way that’s contrary to the first commandment, i.e. makes it more important than God.

Use of ‘self esteem’ as a term in counselling to help people get over self loathing or insecurities is one thing, using it as an excuse to be selfish and/or relativize God’s commandments in some other way would be a whole different thing altogether. Hedonism, egoism etc. would fall under the latter category.
 
It think self-esteem is fine so long as it’s taught alongside sel-awareness and self-control
 
i dont see why self esteem is bad unless one mistakes it for pride?
 
i’d much prefer the old term “self respect”. If we don’t have that, we may as well lie down in the gutter and expire.

“Self-esteem” makes me sick: a relatively new PC term that’s puffed up/self-important!
In some quarters, there’s destructive emphasis on I/ME/SELF!😦
I guess I would agree with this, but I’m not really sure if self-esteem is all that bad. We have to have confidence in ourselves, and as long as that doesn’t turn into an abundance of pride, we are probably fine.

I tend to think this way: First I must be confident in God. He is the one I should be most confident in. Plus, God loves me, and has a plan for me… therefore He has confidence in me. If God has confidence in me, why should I not believe in myself?

Self-esteem is a good thing. We just need to make sure we don’t get too prideful, or slip into despair.
 
i dont see why self esteem is bad unless one mistakes it for pride?
It’s not the concept itself (which is defined as something more akin to self respect) so much as the way it’s taught and implemented. It’s the “you’re awesome just the way you are! Never, ever change anything about yourself!” school of thought. It very quickly becomes demands to accept sins and failings because “that’s just who I am.”
 
In Mark 12:31 Jesus tells us to love our neighbors as ourselves which allows for self love and respect. It doesn’t mean a sense of pridefullness or entitlement which is so often confused in our current society.

As often as not, those I meet who have a reasonable level of self worth, or esteem, are seen as humble by those around them.

Pax
 
Christianity upholds the dignity of man without which the concept of self-esteem is meaningless so I would say that they are not only compatible but intertwined. True understanding of the value of human life in the eyes of God should give one a rightly ordered sense of self esteem.
 
It’s sometimes helpful to look up the definitions of words we don’t “get”.
Self-esteem is just confidence in one’s worth and abilities.
It means accepting that God made you in His image and loves you unconditionally.
It means you recognize that you are imperfect but always capable of being better.
It has nothing to do with vanity or selfishness (those are different words for a reason).
Without self-esteem, we are afraid to use the gifts God has given us.
If you don’t love yourself, chances are high that you can’t love other people.
Since that is exactly what God wants us to do, I’d say yes, self-esteem is not only compatible with, but required for, Christianity/Catholicism.
 
Is the concept of Self esteem compatible with Catholicism/Christianity?

I think at very least,most people would be in agreement that low self esteem is bad?
Elena321,

Fr. Michel Esparza, a Spanish, Catholic priest, wrote a book extremely relevant to your questions that has been translated to English.

Self-Esteem Without Selfishness: Increasing Our Capacity for Love

If your questions are prompted by no more than a fleeting, idle curiosity, this book may not hold your attention. However, if you struggle with pride or humility and have the desire and some capacity to look honestly at yourself, you may find the book extremely valuable. However, be warned, the book can prompt some rather uncomfortable, maybe even painful, introspection.
 
Elena321,

Fr. Michel Esparza, a Spanish, Catholic priest, wrote a book extremely relevant to your questions that has been translated to English.

Self-Esteem Without Selfishness: Increasing Our Capacity for Love

If your questions are prompted by no more than a fleeting, idle curiosity, this book may not hold your attention. However, if you struggle with pride or humility and have the desire and some capacity to look honestly at yourself, you may find the book extremely valuable. However, be warned, the book can prompt some rather uncomfortable, maybe even painful, introspection.
Just sent that to my Kindle 🙂
 
I guess I would agree with this, but I’m not really sure if self-esteem is all that bad…
.
It’s the word “esteem” that i loathe. i just think that the word “respect” should be used.🤷
In my own mind, “esteem” is too close to “admiration”
“Self-admiration”!!!

i’ll stick with “self respect”: a softer term, and as said before, we all need that.

PS :eek:
Doing a google search a few minutes ago, after typing in “self esteem versus self-respect”, there was a fair number of hits.
The only ones i poked my nose into were:
Psychology Today: Self-Esteem vs Self-Respect
NO NONSENSE SELF-DEFENSE: Self-Respect vs Self-Esteem
Experimental Theology: Self-esteem versus Self-respect


NO NONSENSE SELF-DEFENSE says:
There has been*** great focus on self-esteem in pop psychology***. Unfortunately, as is often the case with popular buzz words the public grabs hold of, the understanding tends to be superficial.
Emphasis added.

Experimental Theology says:
Self-esteem is, of course, a term in the modern lexicon of psychobabble…etc.
All of this rant just to justify my preference for “respect”!!!:eek:
Call it labouring the point if you like.
But it was necessary.
i’m sick of the way the language has been mangled!!!.😦
Maybe accuracy doesn’t matter anymore, but it does to some of us.

Go online, and have a look…
 
These days,the notion of self esteem has become very popular and is taught to school students etc,but I have also read some Christians say that the concept of self esteem is not a Christian concept.
I think at very least,most people would be in agreement that low self esteem is bad?
Personally, I find it a concept quite compatible with Christianity.

“God created mankind in his image;
in the image of God he created them;
male and female he created them.”
- Genesis 1:27

“You must shine among them like stars lighting up the sky” - Phil. 2:15

“I know I’m special, cause God don’t make no junk!” - unknown
 
i’d much prefer the old term “self respect”. If we don’t have that, we may as well lie down in the gutter and expire.

“Self-esteem” makes me sick: a relatively new PC term that’s puffed up/self-important!
In some quarters, there’s destructive emphasis on I/ME/SELF!😦
I think the term “self-esteem” came to be substituted for the more common “self-respect” because the latter term had come to imply some kind of merit. You know, the shaming “don’t you have any self-respect?” thing. The old term came to mean a certain minimal level of pride maintenance. The terms overlap, and both mean different things to different people. The question, then, is this: Do you see yourself truthfully–which is as much to say as do you see yourself as much as God does as your limited self-awareness allows–and with an attitude that leads you do act according to the way God sees you?

This is always the problem when it comes to loving our neighbors as ourselves. Humility means having a realistic view of ourselves that recognizes both how much we are loved without any merit on our own part and extending that recognition to all that God loves as much as we do to ourselves.

Whether you call it self-respect or self-esteem, in the end if we do not recognize that we have value because God loves us all without regard to our “deserving” it and Himself deserves all the love we have to offer Him, we are deceived. That lack of recognition can have very grave consequences. That recognition of our value in God’s eyes is the kind of “self-esteem” we are to have. It is necessary to have that recognition without external validation from the world in order to do what we ought to do:

See what love the Father has bestowed on us that we may be called the children of God. Yet so we are. The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Beloved, we are God’s children now; what we shall be has not yet been revealed. We do know that when it is revealed we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. Everyone who has this hope based on him makes himself pure, as he is pure.
1 John 3:1-3
 
I think the term “self-esteem” came to be substituted for the more common “self-respect” because the latter term had come to imply some kind of merit…
Have a read (or re-read) of Post #13 to see my reason for loathing that term, and go online to those 3 sites. If they had promoted that “E” word, i wouldn’t have bothered to put up that post (ie #13). But, they did the opposite.

“Self esteem” probably invaded the language via so-called “Self-improvement”, “Self-affirmation”, “Management” courses and similar.

To repeat: i’m sick of the way the language has been mangled!😦
And most people thoughtlessly go along with it.
 
Have a read (or re-read) of Post #13 to see my reason for loathing that term, and go online to those 3 sites. If they had promoted that “E” word, i wouldn’t have bothered to put up that post (ie #13). But, they did the opposite.

“Self esteem” probably invaded the language via so-called “Self-improvement”, “Self-affirmation”, “Management” courses and similar.

To repeat: i’m sick of the way the language has been mangled!😦
And most people thoughtlessly go along with it.
I don’t think the problem is the term, “self-esteem.”

I think the problem is the philosophy of extreme individualism that people have been taught to suppose will make them happy. I think the falsehood behind that supposition is ruining marriages and causing a lot of people to become depressed because they’ve been lead to think they are at fault if they are not happy, because they haven’t made choices that are “true to themselves.”

Blind conformity doesn’t bring joy, but individualism doesn’t bring joy, either. Joy comes from loving God and loving neighbor as oneself. As for happiness, we live in a fallen world, a vale of tears. We are not going to escape all suffering here. Anyone who teaches us to think we can cleverly run our lives so that we will someday go victoriously from one success to the next is passing on a falsehood.
 
I don’t think the problem is the term, “self-esteem.” …
We’ll just have to agree to disagree. This can’t go on!😦

Did you look at those articles?
i’ll stick with what they say. After all, they know what they’re talking about regarding that wretched “E” word.
 
i dont see why self esteem is bad unless one mistakes it for pride?
I’m not sure the people were saying it was bad per say but rather that it should be “God esteem” instead of self-esteem. I don’t understand the difference.
 
And isn’t a “healthy self esteem” necessary to have true humility?
I mean in the sense,for example, the Prayer Litany of Humility say “deliver me from the desire of being preferred to others”.
If someone had low self esteem already then their perception of this could become twisted (if that makes sense)?
 
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