Is the Sign of Peace phoney?

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There were a few times I could either taste or smell some kind of perfume when I received Communion either from the priest or the EMHC.
If the priest uses aftershave or deodorant , and the lady uses scent , then it would be normal to smell it .
 
Like it or not, many members of this forum were around during Vatican II and experienced the subsequent changes first had. Some had better experiences than others. From my perspective, who things have gone worst for are the subsequent generations who came of age furthest removed from the time Vatican II occurred. Having attending Catholic schools for most elementary and high school years, I have to say the presence of those of my generation in the Church today is just not there as it should be. While Vatican II actually held up the traditions and beliefs of the Church, some of its actual implementation has been anything other than authentic.

While we’re worrying specifically about the Sign of Peace here, it was present in all the Masses I attended growing up and quite honestly in all the school Masses it was kind of phony in situations where one is amongst the people you were around all day anyways but is probably more appropriate at a more public Sunday Mass; again it is optional for a reason. It may or may not be appropriate at a funeral for example depending on the circumstances, the atmosphere at Mass, and ultimately the discretion of the priest. At any rate, while during the Canon of the Mass while we used to all be kneeling, we’re all to stand up and shake eachother’s hand and then there’s confusion in some parishes as to whether to kneel or not again at the Agnus Dei; so some parishes may kneel again and some may not.

In my opinion, to try and explain almost any aspect of the Latin rite of Mass without reference to or at least some knowledge of the Extraordinary Form of the Mass (calling it the “Tridentine rite” is inaccurate by the way as the Mass existed more or less in that form a thousand years before) is just dumb. Even the terminology in reference to certain parts of the Mass is extremely important, lest we fall into situations where basic tenements of the Mass in the “Latin rite” may be understood differently or perhaps not understood at all depending on location, or maybe on the extreme end even important parts such as the five Ordinaries of the Mass might (even innocently or occasionally) disappear, let alone the Propers of the Mass which to many congregations today I’m sure are totally misunderstood.
 
The Sign of Peace is not a time to socialize. It’s a ritual that is supposed to be restrained and only offered to those next to you. And because it’s a ritual action it’s supposed to be offered the same way to each person whether that’s your spouse or your child or a stranger.
The Rite of Peace
  1. The Rite of Peace follows, by which the Church asks for peace and unity for herself and for the whole human family, and the faithful express to each other their ecclesial communion and mutual charity before communicating in the Sacrament.
As for the sign of peace to be given, the manner is to be established by Conferences of Bishops in accordance with the culture and customs of the peoples. (In the dioceses of Canada, the sign of peace is given by a handshake or a bow) It is, however, appropriate that each person offer the sign of peace only to those who are nearest and in a sober manner.
I’m familiar with a parish where a catechumen, an immigrant, was deemed not ready for Baptism until she was able to exchange the sign of peace with another immigrant who belonged to an enemy faction back in their homeland.
 
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I suppose that the practice may be more effective in small and closely knit parishes, where it’s likely that you’re peeved at the guy behind you for showing up late for his shift at the KoC pancake breakfast, or his wife for winning against you in the Parish Council election.
Yeah, this is why I say it’s usually a symbolic gesture, unless perhaps you are wishing peace to your own family members with whom you no doubt have ups and downs and arguments, or you just happen to know the guy next to you well. The person with whom I really need to “make peace” is likely living in some other part of the country and not Catholic, he might not even believe in God. Me wishing peace to others in church is symbolic of my willingness to make peace with people I actually have a beef with, who generally are not the same people I’m waving my upraised hand to in church.
 
I welcomed the reintroduction of the sign of peace for all during the Eucharist as part of the liturgical reforms . We would turn to those on either side of us and give the sign of peace . What I don’t like is someone who feels that he/she should go through the whole congregation with it . I know that is an exaggeration , and if it suits them that’s fine , but I will still find it a little irksome .

My friend who said he found it phoney has a point . Speaking more widely , when we gather to celebrate the Eucharist there is a bond between us which surpasses every other bond in life . It is sad when that bond is not lived out when we are out and about in our daily living . We are part of a welcoming , hospitable community as members of the Church , and if this is not shown outside of the church building , there is something lacking inside of the church building .
I’m one of those who makes the sign of peace with as many of those around me as I can reach. In the Gospel of St. John 3:16, we read: “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life.” In loving the world, He reaches out to it one person at a time, so I do likewise. As big as some churches are, we don’t always get to know our brothers & sisters in the faith, so this is one way I try to do that. We are family in Christ so I try to reach out. Who knows? Someone may just need a smile & a human touch to make their day & keep them connected. So in a little way, I try to let them know that they matter.

On the issue of phoniness, I was not that long ago thinking about the Our Father & the sincerity of heart while reciting it - particularly when I pray for Our Heavenly Father to forgive me as I forgive others. God has a sense of humor! Shortly after pondering this topic, “Father Simon Says” aired on Relevant Radio, & Fr. Simon broached that very topic, questioning how how many of us go to Confession, recite that very prayer, then before the altar to receive Him, make liars of ourselves in not forgiving others. It’s a very sobering thought - one that is truly heartbreaking & convicting if we honestly think about it.
 
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Thank you for sharing this. When I attend Latin Rite mass, I find the Sign of Peace to be a bit uncomfortable for me and I haven’t really liked it. This gives me a different perspective.
 
my wife IS a “health care professional” ie RN

she graduated w/honors

her aunt was the dean of nursing at a university

she sees this issue differently

i don’t want to fight about this

if someone offers me their hand; i will accept it

she chooses not to during flu season
Her aunt’s creds aren’t hers, your wife’s aren’t yours, and being a dean doesn’t automatically impose scads of knowledge. I could wave my own creds but I’m not interested in who has what. Let her see it differently. I’m not fighting you. But having worked in a world for eight years with people with absolutely no immune system, I know for a fact your risk is minimal. Doesn’t mean you can’t choose differently - but the risk is bigger in Target than in church. Unless you lick your hands.

You know, the defensiveness really isn’t needed. Sharing knowledge isn’t picking a fight, for heaven’s sake.
 
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When the sign of peace was reintroduced into the Eucharistic Liturgy a friend said that he thought it was phoney .

He said that you can give the sign of peace to the person next to you in church on Sunday morning , but when you see the same person in the street on Monday morning he/she passes you as if you had never met .
That doesn’t mean the sign of peace is phoney – it means the person who exchanges the sign of peace with you on Sunday and passes you on the street on Monday without acknowledging your existence is phoney.
 
it means the person who exchanges the sign of peace with you on Sunday and passes you on the street on Monday without acknowledging your existence is phoney.
Not necessarily, the person may have just forgotten who you are. And if they don’t know your name, what would you want them to say?
 
Not necessarily, the person may have just forgotten who you are. And if they don’t know your name, what would you want them to say?
No, you’re right. I’m just thinking of those who really are “phoney” (for want of a better word), who don’t carry the spirit of the sign of peace past the church doors. There may not be many of those, but there are a few in every church, I’m sure.
 
Two thoughts:

The person passing you on the street Monday morning may or may not be in the wrong for not saying hello. How did you go about greeting them? (I think we have a tendency to blame instead of reflect.)
I suppose that the practice may be more effective in small and closely knit parishes
It works in every parish where it occurs; there’s no such thing as “effective” because as stated before, it’s liturgical and not a greeting. The only effect is spiritual.
 
That doesn’t mean the sign of peace is phoney – it means the person who exchanges the sign of peace with you on Sunday and passes you on the street on Monday without acknowledging your existence is phoney.
Not necessarily, the person may have just forgotten who you are.
I could be one of those who is unintentionally oblivious to someone on the street. I don’t have great facial recognition. I could be oblivious because I’m wrangling my kids or absorbed in my own thoughts. But that doesn’t mean I’m being phoney during the SOP during Mass. I know you weren’t implying that, though.

But I agree with you, there are always some phonies, in every group of people. However:

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Yes, a burden we know nothing about. 😳
That is why people need to be kind and give people the benefit of the doubt.
 
Now I have this mental image of the two passing each other and each one thinking: Well! He didn’t even say hello! How rude!
 
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