But that implies, for instance, that it’s better to live for a very short time, possibly enduring great suffering, but with the inner peace that comes from love and forgiveness, than to have a long life enjoying power and pleasure but with “toxic” emotions. It’s not at all clear to me why, from a purely secular point of view, that would be the case.
There is no easy answer for the secularist, I suppose. I’m thinking of Qoheleth, who wrote, “a live dog is better than a dead lion.”
On the other hand, the whole idea of euthanasia (a rather secularist concept) is precisely that of quality of life, versus quantity of life. This is also the spirit behind the expression, “live free, or die.”
There are different kinds of goods. Some people enjoy the feeling of dominating others, of expressing anger through violence, etc. Now all the world’s major wisdom traditions, theistic and nontheistic, say that this is a terrible way to live no matter how “good” it may feel subjectively…
It does become hard to assess relative levels of satisfaction or happiness in individuals, since we are not inside their heads. A lot of individuals who seemingly hurt others or act unkindly towards them seem rather happy, laugh a lot (albeit somewhat too insistently, at times) and seem to have the best of everything; then again, they may be good actors, or skillful at hiding their miserableness even from themselves.
What I’ve seen in people who are consistently “not nice” to others is a lot of buried hurt – they are easily wounded, which is surprising in those who so often cause harm to others. They often spend a lot of time complaining of how others have wronged them! There is almost this sense of taking revenge; so, for example, someone might say, "nobody gives a damn about me; why should I give a damn about anybody?"This is even easier for me to perceive in the examples that are writ large – the Ivan the Terrible who flies into rages; the Hitlers; the Stalins. These were not satisfied people. There is that line from the novel “American Psycho” which I had quoted elswhere in this forum: “my pain is constant and sharp, and I do not wish for a better world for anyone. Instead, I want to inflict my pain on others; I want no one to escape.”
I had also been struck by the conclusion of an old Twilight Zone episode, “Piano in the House”, where (through the mystical effect of this bewitched piano) the sadistic main character suddenly becomes in touch with his deepest emotions, and articulates all of the innermost motives for his behavior.
“There’s a small frightened boy and I’ve kept him hidden away inside me and he only likes to hurt people and I can’t stop him from doing it.
Did you know that I envied you, marge?
I can’t embrace the world as you do.
And in my envy, I released that frightened child inside me and I let him hurt you.
I tried to hurt you too, greg.
I gave bad reviews to your plays when I should have given praise.
I coveted your talent because I have none.
And I hurt you in every childish way I could.
Esther, I’ve hurt you most of all.
You came to me with love but it frightened me.
I don’t know how to return love except as a child does-- with shrieks and blows and indifference.”
This is very subtle psychology, if it is worth anything. It goes beyond surface appearances (see also Dostoevsky’s Underground Man, who was chronically nursing hurts and taking revenge for them). Hitler, for example, was to all appearances very strong; invulnerable. In actuality, he was weak and full of fear. He certainly didn’t understand himself; if he did, he would have realized that the Jews as such had never harmed him, and that he was hysterically afraid of them (and that the Jews were not the real issue, whatever that issue was). Gandhi, on the other hand, was deceptively weak and frail; but, in actuality, had self-knowledge, had freedom from fear, and was strong.
Suppose I’ll give the Grich the last word (I watch a lot of movies, it seems

): “Nerve of those Whos. Inviting me down there, on such short notice. Even if I wanted to go, my schedule wouldn’t allow it! (flips his datebook open) 4:00: Wallow in self-pity. 4:30: Stare into the abyss. 5:00: Solve world hunger; tell no one! 5:30: Jazzercise. 6:30: Dinner with me; I can’t cancel that again! 7:00: wrestle with my self-loathing… I’m booked! Of course, if I bump the loathing to 9:00, I’ll probably still have time to lie in my bed, stare at the ceiling and slip slowly into madness. But what would I wear?!”
These individuals cause such suffering to others, because they present such a convincing face to the world; it is hard for others to call their bluff. Guess it’s Gandhi who has the last word, “When I despair, I remember that all through history the ways of truth and love have always won. There have been tyrants, and murderers, and for a time they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall.”