Is there something wrong?

[blessedstar]

I am happiest alone with Jesus and when I am among people with Jesus I find it hard. I find most of the time I am so absorbed without really thinking about it that although I go about my daily business I find it hard to go about it as my whole person seems to be elsewhere.

I really love people and have friends and family, but my mind is so distant that I find conversation with them hard and I find all the talking which is mostly about nothing very hard to do and often these conversations can be a trap for the tongue if you know what I mean.

I can spend hours alone with Jesus and don’t know where this time has gone and it seems like only a minute.

I feel more and more drawn to be alone with Jesus and it is so sweet to constantly be with Him this way that it pains me to have to leave the solitude with Him, but of course I have to and have things to do in the world.

I am happy in my life as it is very simple and I have people I love and they love me. Everything is wonderful.

Am I doing something wrong? I feel like I am slipping away from everything, that is people and places. Is there something wrong do you think? I would like to know of any words you may have for me to spiritually guide me and I am thankful for any advice.

With love and in my Living Prayer of life.

 

[Vittorio23]

Perhaps you have a vocation to a contemplative community?

 

[blessedstar]

Perhaps you have a vocation to a contemplative community?

Thank you for your reply.

Is it normal to want to be alone with Jesus like this? I would prefer to be alone with Jesus like this most of the time, is that odd?

When I am in the street and people come up and talk to me inside myself I am torn, I want to be kind and pleasant with people and so I listen to them mostly rather than doing any talking, but I find don’t have anything I want to say really and I prefer to be with Jesus inside my soul. So I end up listening to them and they often say ‘It’s been lovely talking with you’ and I hardly said a word!

When visitors come to my home, I make them welcome and listen to them both family and friends, but I don’t have anything much I want to talk about with them and so I listen and they seem to enjoy themselves, but I am happiest when they have gone home and I am alone with Jesus again. Is that odd?

 

[TOP]

You are not of this world anymore. Find comfort in the sacred heart of Jesus. I envy your gift of love. Tim

 

[pumpkinbeast]

Go find a convent and join it, ASAP. You are obviously called to the contemplative religious life. It doesn’t matter if it is normal or not, it’s your vocation. Embrace it, Jesus is calling you to Himself.

 

[Vittorio23]

Odd? Hmm. I wouldn’t say odd. I’d say that many are not at the spiritual level that you are at.

Every person is called to God in a different way- that is to say, a soul responds to God differently.

I would recommend finding a good confessor or spiritual director to discuss your spiritual life with. He will be able to advise you and help you discern what this may mean for your vocation.

 

[distracted]

i can totally relate!!

The only thing is… While i too don’t care to talk about “nothing”… I try to listen carefully (read between the lines, etc.) because i see Jesus in everyone (or try to ). I sympathize w/ the problems of others…
No, i am not saying or implying that you don’t… just that, well…as much as i love being alone with Jesus myself, i know there is a lot of suffering “out there” and so, i try to help any way i can…

That being said, i seriously believe that one of the best - if not THE best way to help others is to pray for them - and waht better way 2 do that than when you have no distractions? I love being at the Blessed Sacrament for hours… and i feel that the people i think about while there are prayed for…

Anyway, was glad to read this, because i was beginning to think i was alone in feeling this way.

 

[blessedstar]

i can totally relate!!

The only thing is… While i too don’t care to talk about “nothing”… I try to listen carefully (read between the lines, etc.) because i see Jesus in everyone (or try to ). I sympathize w/ the problems of others…
No, i am not saying or implying that you don’t… just that, well…as much as i love being alone with Jesus myself, i know there is a lot of suffering “out there” and so, i try to help any way i can…

That being said, i seriously believe that one of the best - if not THE best way to help others is to pray for them - and waht better way 2 do that than when you have no distractions? I love being at the Blessed Sacrament for hours… and i feel that the people i think about while there are prayed for…

Anyway, was glad to read this, because i was beginning to think i was alone in feeling this way.

Thank you for all of the replies.

I think the Holy Spirit spoke in your post to me.

This is the thing, whenever people talk to me they end up telling me all about their lives and problems, even total strangers who I might meet just for a few minutes at check out queue, they will tell me all of their problems and sufferings and I do pray for them with the Living Prayer of my life offering my self to Jesus for them, I suppose I must have a face people can tell things to. They tell me the bad things they have done too, the very worst about themselves and I try to understand why they did what they did because I have been very wicked and so I just listen.

I just thought to myself today that maybe I am odd, because to be truthful I have a Spiritual Director but I don’t see him very often and mostly I go to Jesus and tell Him all the details, but today I thought to myself, ‘Perhaps you are becoming odd in wanting to be alone with Jesus all the time and not wanting to be with people.’

Thank you again for the advice.