Is this really a marriage?

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Well, if we’re talking about fairness, having a discussion about it and hearing his side of what he’s dealing with would probably be the best choice. Many people have reported going through a period where they were curious about homosexual acts, particularly when influenced by porn, but ultimately realized their primary inclination was toward the opposite sex.
 
Possibly. I’m just pointing out that if he had these secret inclinations and didn’t tell his wife before marriage, it’s possible that the marriage is invalid.
 
I scheduled an appointment with a Priest and marriage counselor, there is more to this than a book and a “caught him” event; for now, we will see how this meeting goes. Thank you all for your answers, they have helped ease my anger and focus on solutions instead of guiding my view towards the “exit” sign. I will have to face this situation soon, but I am sure I am willing to make an effort to mend things instead of end things.
 
Might just be a fantasy.

Ask any promiscuous gay man if he has ever had sex with a straight guy and the answer most likely will be yes. I’m told that a lot of men who visit gay cruising sites have wife or girlfriends.

Some straight men have sex with other guys but don’t identity as gay and have no desire to be in a romantic relationship with another man.
 
Alex5 said:
Ask any promiscuous gay man if he has ever had sex with a straight guy and the answer most likely will be yes.
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I’d say that’s overstated a bit. Some gay men I’ve known seem to view “turning” a straight man as their life goal.
 
He may be bisexual. She needs to have a serious heart to heart with him to understand his attraction and determine whether or not he is gay.

A bisexual spouse can be a good spouse, but a gay one is forcing them both to live a lie.

I agree that it’s not just trifling—this cuts to the very heart of whether their marriage is actually valid.
 
Having sexual attraction to other men, and acting on that attraction by having sex with other men IS the definition of being gay!!!

It’s unfair to everyone involved to maintain the illusion of a marriage and deny homosexual tendencies when married to an opposite gender spouse. Adultery and lies are NOT the foundation of a marriage.
 
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Men have sex with watermelons. That doesn’t make them “watermelon-sexual” (or whatever).

It’s not necessarily the “man” that a man is attracted to (hence bisexual or homosexual). It’s the SEX.

Men just like sex a whole lot, and if they don’t learn to control their constant craving, they will masturbate many times each day, and have sex with anything or anyone who offers. If you’re a man, having sex doesn’t necessarily quell desire–it just leads to desiring more sex!

Most men do learn control, but it’s not easy in a society that is so permissive towards any and all sex acts (other than sex with children and polygamous marriage, although i think polygamous marriage will be accepted soon–we’ve seen at least two acclaimed television series featuring polygamous marriage in a good light.) But many many men struggle constantly with masturbation.

The survival of a society depends on men learning to control their desire for sex. Our hyper-sexed U.S. society, IMO, is only surviving due to the grace of God as He continues to have mercy on us, probably mainly because of the remnant of practicing Christians who continue to call upon His Name.

Women usually don’t have that constant craving for sex because of their female “cyclic” physiology. Nature gives women a few weeks each month where sex is the last thing on their minds!

Also, women tend to become aroused when there is a relationship and a build-up of loving words and touches. Women don’t become aroused just looking at a man or pictures of men. Even the sexy novels that women read include at least 50 pages of mere romance (conversation, flirting, kind acts, dancing, dinners out, walking on a beach, etc.) before that first steamy love scene–which is usually just a clinging kiss, no sex. Then there is a second really steamy love scene with sex, and then a final love scene near the end of the novel that is usually the wedding night. Most men would be extremely bored with women’s sexy romance novels because sex only happens twice in the whole novel!

Of course there are exceptions and there are some women who have constant sexual desire. But it’s not the norm like it usually is for men. Men are created to want sex–that’s how the world remains populated!
 
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