Is this sinful?

[Pieman333272]

This is a little embarrassing to say, but I trust this community to help me with this . I am a single male and am heterosexual (male female). However, I have fat fetishism and enjoy looking at images and videos and reading stories about fat people or fat increase. This causes no masturbation on my part and I do not believe I am addicted to any of them. I also stay away from nudity, male-based stuff and porn/sex in these and do not want to see them. However, I feel as though this is bad nonetheless . Is this sinful? If so, how would I confess about this to a priest?

 

[Deb_H]

I dont know if its sinful or not . I believe tho that fat is caused by gluttony when not attributable to thyroid issues or other health issues . That being the case you are looking joyfully on another persons sin , not in a nasty way its true but none the less there it is . Something to pray over and meditate on .

 

[scottywolf777]

Actually you’re a late renassance painter they were totally obsessed with fat women
I don’t imagine there’s anything sinful perse based on your descriptions it just means you run with a different crowd than the rest of society.

 

[JohnDamian]

This is a little embarrassing to say, but I trust this community to help me with this . I am a single male and am heterosexual (male female). However, I have fat fetishism and enjoy looking at images and videos and reading stories about fat people or fat increase. This causes no masturbation on my part and I do not believe I am addicted to any of them. I also stay away from nudity, male-based stuff and porn/sex in these and do not want to see them. However, I feel as though this is bad nonetheless . Is this sinful? If so, how would I confess about this to a priest?

We all have our crosses to bear; we are not to judge other individuals nor is that the role of your priest to judge your mistakes and weaknesses. It is obviously at least a venial sin with yourself and possibly even a mortal one; so I would advise confession – although understanding the embarrasing nature of this particular incident/s it might warrent travelling to another Priest. The sacrament of penance is not invalid if you go to a Priest you do not know; and if that is what is necessary for you to be able to overcome this.

Everyone has something to confess; even the Saints; such as Thomas doubted Jesus; Peter denied Jesus; Paul persecuted Christians – we are all flawed people; and it is in coming to terms with these flaws that we are able to grow in life in Christ.

As a general rule; if you wouldn’t like to say it to your Priest; you probably have too. No one goes to confession to confess giving money to charity or some other noble act; all of us regret what we have done as wrong; and many of us have great difficulty overcoming such embrarrasing things.

 

[DexUK]

Interesting question.

Obviously each person has their own idea of what they find attractive in the opposite sex. That in itself is not sinful.

What you should be wary of, though, is by virtue of this attraction that you have, you don’t encourage others to live unhealthily in order to please you.

Certainly obesity is harmful to one’s long term health prospects. I don’t think I’ve ever seen an obese octogenarian. Even if longevity is managed, other health issues arise, like diabetes, high blood pressure, etc, which require medical intervention at some cost to the patient and, presumably, incurring a general increase in insurance premiums (that’s the nature of insurance: the costs are spread out so the ‘virtuous’ amongst us end up subsidising the ones who get ill/have road accidents/etc…)

Yes, by all means find chubby people attractive. But be moderate, as with all things, and be careful how you cause others to behave.

Think of it this way. Suppose you meet the woman of your dreams… nice personality, similar interests, tips the scales at your preferred level… and you get married and she decides that it’s time to slim down to a healthy 150lb. Can you live with that?

You can’t help what you like (any more than anyone else, regardless of their particular persuasion). It’s how you behave in respect of it that matters.

So, ask yourself these questions:

Do I objectify people as a result of seeking out what would otherwise be thought of as non-obscene images?

Do I seek these images out just for my own gratification (whether or not expressed in sexual ways)?

Is that gratification fair to the person who is depicted in such images? Would they be happy to be viewed that way or mortified? (I.e. it would probably be unfair if you chose to find what you think is attractive in, say, a Weight Watchers magazine).

Essentially, act in a loving way and you’re fine. Act in a way that someone might be upset about (rather than faux outrage of course, just because you’re different) and you’re probably on less solid ground.

 

[presidentjlh]

It’s perfectly okay for one to have an inclination towards women who are of a heavier-set. They are people too. But it’s not good for one to focus on that aspect. That’s still focusing on the outward appearance of someone, just as much as it would be if one focused on women of the more-slender appearance. Is it a mortal sin? No, but the reading about overweight women is a little risky, like a possible step down a dark path.

So, yes and no. It’s good that you aren’t the shallow male that only looks for the movie-star looks. But try to focus on the personality of a person more.

 

[Edward_H]

Might be worth some time with a priest in some spiritual direction, non-confession time. Might be more than meets the eye, or more off-shoots on the way. It’s wonderful that you’re being sincere and candid about it.

But what makes me wonder is the time spent doing it…is this time spent with God as it were. Or is this your own special private time, something perhaps closed off and separate from your ongoing conversation with God. Are you discerning how you spend you time with this with God? How is this activity helping others, preparing to help you help others, allowing you to give God glory, preparing you to give God Glory.

Gardening may appear harmless, but it can become, over time some form of an attachment, something too personal, too closed off. The flowers grown are no longer given away to nursing homes, photos of them no longer posted to the enjoyment of others. The garden is in the backyard, no longer visibile and enjoyable by passersby. You’re no longer teaching or showing others how to garden. All activities should be sanctifiable in some manner.

Does that make sense?

 

[Deb_H]

Might be worth some time with a priest in some spiritual direction, non-confession time. Might be more than meets the eye, or more off-shoots on the way. It’s wonderful that you’re being sincere and candid about it.

But what makes me wonder is the time spent doing it…is this time spent with God as it were. Or is this your own special private time, something perhaps closed off and separate from your ongoing conversation with God. Are you discerning how you spend you time with this with God? How is this activity helping others, preparing to help you help others, allowing you to give God glory, preparing you to give God Glory.

Gardening may appear harmless, but it can become, over time some form of an attachment, something too personal, too closed off. The flowers grown are no longer given away to nursing homes, photos of them no longer posted to the enjoyment of others. The garden is in the backyard, no longer visibile and enjoyable by passersby. You’re no longer teaching or showing others how to garden. All activities should be sanctifiable in some manner.

Does that make sense?

Wow!! Thank you for this post ! It makes much sense to me and I hope to the OP . I had not thought of it in this way before … You have just changed my views . Thanks again