Is this what Scruples is like?

[Waterfront]

Hello, I’m a convert, who was raised Protestant.

So I’ve always struggled with OCD and intrusive thoughts before I was Catholic, thought I had those things beaten, but apparently not.

I’ve been to confession more times this year than ever before because I truly want to follow the teachings of being truly forgiven of my sins!

Ever since I started confession I’ve had OCD anxiety attacks about past sins and If I made good confessions, doubt in my mind is endless, sometimes when I wake up in the morning and until I finally get a break when I go to bed at night. It’s exhausting.

Anyway so on to the meat of the problem, I made what I thought was a complete and full confession, now a couple days later I have thoughts telling me I forgot to name the number of the sin, when I know I named the number, or maybe I don’t know for sure, my mind is bouncing back and forth but now doubt is creeping back in and feel like I have to recon fess the ones my mind decided I didn’t number at all. Even though I’m sure I numbered them and the priest never asked any questions…or maybe I’m not sure, my mind is spiraling…

Is this scruples? Should I reconfess the ones my mind is saying I didn’t number or am I going down a path of hurt?

Thanks

 

[MeganCecilia]

Yes this is scruples. Do not reconfess. Get a spiritual director and a counselor. If the priest needed more information he would have asked. Relax your mind. You got absolution you were FORGIVEN. 100% no doubt about it. These feeling are not coming from God. It is your OCD and scruples. You need to get professional treatment for these issues

 

[Waterfront]

Thanks for your advice! I think I was in denial all those years as a teen when I used to wash my hands 100 times a day, I think I had truly beaten it but confession caused a flare up in my mind, and that makes me sad because I want to be the best catholic I can for my wife and kids, I can’t give up, any more words of wisdom from anyone who dealt with this is welcome to help!

Edit: going to bed to get some peace from this for at least the night, after some prayer, Ill check in later

 

[MeganCecilia]

that makes me sad because I want to be the best catholic I can for my wife and kids, I can’t give up

Do not let this make you sad. There have been many saints who dealt with scruples actually. You care so much and that is obvious. I know you will not give up and I know you are a great Catholic for your family (Despite how you may feel). Your anxieties will not change that.

I am so sorry you have this cross to bear. Many others deal with this too. Definitely make an appointment with a therapist. Don’t be disappointed that you are feeling this OCD again. It does not mean your previous progress is lost.

I recommend seeing the same confessor repeatedly. Do not switch it up. Keep going to the same priest, trusting his advice. He will guide you. Jesus works THROUGH him so please please believe what he tells you.

Also remember the difference between feelings and facts. You can’t control your feelings but you can go against them through your intellect. Ex “I didn’t confess the right way!!” Back it up with your intellect: “I was contrite and my sins were forgiven. Absolved completely and if I did not go into enough detail, the priest would’ve asked me more questions.”

Just try to combat any negative thought at all with a positive one!

You can pray the divine mercy chaplet it is very helpful for me.

You will be ok. God bless you

 

[stuartbrianhenlis]

Waterfront,

OCD is a debilitating mental illness that only gets worse if untreated. I urge you to seek therapy. A good therapist and medication will help to ease the symptoms. Believe me, I know what it’s like.

 

[FiveLinden]

It is not at all uncommon for OCD to follow someone around as they go through various belief systems. An atheist who becomes a Muslim who becomes a Catholic may well find they have intrusive thoughts first about harming others, then about fasting, and then about confessing sins. The problem is OCD and not its particular manifestation in Catholics as ‘scruples’. If you were a kitchen worker you could worry about contamination and do the washing thing.

Please get professional advice. Both talking and drug therapy is helpful in many cases, according to peer-reviewed literature. I am not giving you advice to go for either one - but I am giving you advice to get advice. Some priests are trained in referral of people to appropriate professionals while some are not. You don’t need to see a priest before a professional who deals with matters of mental health, or the other way around. One knows about your religion. The other knows about electrochemical processes in the physical organ in your head.